


The Sound of You

by mysterioustrumpet



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Asexual Hunk (Voltron), Bands, Battle of the Bands, Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Bisexual Lotor (Voltron), Gay Keith (Voltron), Light-Hearted, M/M, Music, Nonbinary Pidge (Voltron), POV Third Person, Romance, Sexuality Crisis, Slow Burn Keith/Lance (Voltron), band au, klance, light Adashi, musician au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-02
Updated: 2019-03-31
Packaged: 2019-10-20 21:14:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 58,952
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17629823
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mysterioustrumpet/pseuds/mysterioustrumpet
Summary: Lance McClain's life could probably be summed up in one word: music. But becoming a famous musician is harder than he first thought. He feels like he's at a standstill until his band mate, Allura, proposes they enter a battle-of-the-bands. Lance is immediately on board, with the prize being $5000 and the chance to open for the rising band Marmora Blade. With his band members Allura, Pidge, and Hunk, he thinks they have a shot at winning first.That is, until he hears Keith Kogane play. Keith takes up the entire stage when he plays, and Lance finds himself determined to surpass him. But Lance didn't think having a simple rivalry with someone meant thinking about them all day. Or thinking about how good they look. Or how amazing they were on stage. Lance is going to need a lot more than talent to survive this band competition.





	1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

“WHAT’S UP, NERDS!” Lance yells. He plopped on the ground and slipped his shoes off. Ohhhhh, that felt much better. After a long day of standing at work, there was nothing better than taking his shoes off to stretch his toes.

“Hey, Lance,” Pidge shouted back. He could hear them clacking away at their keyboard while the more muffled sounds of video game music came from the TV. Lance walked into the living room to see Hunk leaning forward in his chair with a super intense expression on his face.

Lance glanced at the game he was playing. “Dude, it’s just Mario Kart. Why the intense face?”

Hunk veered the controller to the right, along with his body. “Oh, hey, Lance. I’m in a tournament so I gotta’ get first place.”

Lance smiled. “Oh, really?”

“Yeah.”

Lance started walking toward him, but instead of walking around the couch he walked in front of the TV. It  _ totally  _ wasn’t on purpose though.

“Dude!” Hunk cried, leaning to the left to see around him. “Seriously? I’m trying to win, here!”

Pidge snickered, and Lance smiled wider. “Of course, of course. I just needed to get something from over here that I could only get by walking in front of the TV. I absolutely, one hundred percent couldn’t have gotten it any other way.”

“AAARRGGGHHH!! I’ll kill you, Luigi!” Hunk yelled, spamming the L button. The race ended and he groaned, throwing the controller to the other side of the couch. “Great. Thanks, Lance. Fifth place ‘cuz of you and Luigi.”

Pidge cracked up. “Oh my god, have you seen that slow motion video of Luigi?”

“Yeah!” Lance said. “The one where Luigi, like, glares at the other characters when he passes them?”

Pidge started laughing until they snorted, and Lance laughed too.

“Not funny, guys,” Hunk grumbled, folding his arms across his chest. “Luigi hit me with a red shell and I lost my first place.”

“It’s okay, Hunk,” Pidge said. “It’s not like you were gonna’ get first place to begin with.”

“Hey!”

Pidge and Lance burst out laughing again, and once Lance was starting to calm down he walked over to Hunk and patted him on the shoulder. “Don’t worry, buddy. You’ll get that dastardly Luigi next time.”

“Hmph.” Hunk sank into the couch. “Whatever.” 

The sound of the door opening had Lance peering around the corner. And of course his heart started racing like it always did whenever he saw her. Allura closed the door behind her and a smile lit up her face. “Hello, everyone! I ended work early and I came straight over.” Lance ran over to her and leaned against the wall, putting on his best “lover-boy” face as she took her shoes off. She looked up at him and rolled her eyes. “Yes, hello to you too, Lance.”

Lance’s heart did a slow roll in his chest. Ever since he first met Allura he’d had the biggest crush on her. She was pretty and smart and amazing, and even though Allura thought it was just a school-boy crush on his part, Lance was certain that it was more than that. “Why, hello there, Allura. Why did you come straight here after work?

She smiled. “Give me a tic.” Lance smiled back. He loved her British accent. She bent down and rummaged through her bag, tucking her long white hair behind her ear. “Ah, here!” She stood up with a rolled up poster in her hand and headed around the corner into the living room.

“Hey, you two,” Allura said.

“Hey, Allura,” Pidge and Hunk replied at the same time.

“I don’t mean to interrupt what you’re doing, but I think you’ll want to hear what I have to say.” Pidge and Hunk swung their heads around to look over at her, and she unfurled the poster in her hands. Lance leaned over to see what was on it.

“Ta-da!” Allura presented. The poster was hot pink with a guitar taking up most of the page, and in big, black letters it said, ‘ _ Battle of the Bands!’ _

Lance blinked and glanced up at Allura. “A band contest?”

She nodded in excitement. “Yes! Wouldn’t it be amazing to try it? The winning band gets a five-thousand cash prize  _ and _ gets to open for Marmora Blade!”

Lance’s jaw dropped. “No. Way. Marmora Blade is one of the best bands ever!”

Pidge leaped out of their chair and Allura handed them the poster. Pidge squinted at it and adjusted their glasses. “Let me check out their website.” They returned to their desk and furiously tapped at the keyboard.

“Do you really think we’re good enough to compete?” Hunk asked, resting his chin on the couch top. “I mean, Marmora Blade is  _ really _ good. Could we even get there?”

“Okay.” Pidge cleared their throat. “It says here, ‘Battle of the Bands is a statewide contest that travels from state to state looking for new talent. We’re looking for bands that think out of the box and aren’t afraid to try something different. Winners receive a five-thousand cash prize, as well as the chance to open for rising band  _ Marmora Blade _ . Keep reading to see the rules and how to sign up.”

Lance’s brain took over, and he was immediately transported into a fantasy. He could see it now: their band going through the contest. Winning first place. Opening for Marmora Blade, gaining recognition, and signing a record deal. They’d record their own music, go on tour, and become nationally recognized musicians. Not to mention, he’d have tons of girls around him. That was the  _ dream _ . 

A huge smile lit up Lance’s face. “Guys, we have to do it.”

Hunk frowned thoughtfully. “Are you sure? We might not be that good for it.”

“What are you talking about?” Lance asked, walking in front of Hunk and grabbing him by the shoulders. “Of course we’re good enough! And if we aren’t, we just have to  _ become _ good enough!”

“Lance is right,” Allura said, smiling broadly. “Even if we’re not good enough yet, we know what to do to become better. And even if we don’t win, it would be practice for us. Come on, guys. Isn’t this what we’ve been talking about for a while?”

It was true. Their band,  _ The Paladins _ , was started when Lance met Pidge and Hunk at school. They’d been missing a fourth member, but after meeting Allura at another band’s concert they’d finally formed their band. With Lance on lead guitar and vocals, Allura on rhythm guitar and backup vocals, Hunk on bass, and Pidge on drums, they were a solid band that melded well together. They’d been trying to gain more recognition recently, since the four of them weren’t satisfied with just playing open mic nights. 

Pidge stood up from their desk. “Yeah! I’m in!”

Hunk grinned. “Alright, I’m in too.”

“Yeah!” Lance cheered. “We’re gonna’ be awesome, guys!” 

They all cheered together, and Lance felt his heart dance in his chest. There’d be no stopping them now!

* * *

The first part of the contest would start in the summer before the next school year started, which was fine by Lance. Having to take general education classes at his community college was like torture, especially when he had no interest in most of the other subjects. The first part would have three rounds in three weeks, with each band performing once per round. That meant they had to write three different songs to perform during each round. They wouldn't be told they're scores until the end of the third round.

Lance puffed out a quick breath. He could feel the motivation giving him intense energy, and he couldn’t stop a smile from spreading on his face. They were  _ totally _ gonna’ win this thing. 

The next few weeks were spent practicing, practicing, and practicing. Writing the songs was usually a collaborative thing, but Lance came up with most of the lyrics. He was sitting at his desk going over lyrics for one of the songs when his phone buzzed next to him. 

He picked it up and smiled to see Allura’s icon. “Hey. What’s up?”

“Hey,” Allura responded. “I’m just getting off of work and I wanted to ask about the songs before I officially pass out in my dorm.”

Lance laughed. “Aw, you’re not even gonna’ stop by to see my beautiful face?”

Allura sighed lightly. “Nope. Not today. I’ve got sleep to catch up on. How’s the writing coming along?”

“I’ve got most of the lyrics done, but this last song keeps tripping me up.”

“I’m sure you’ll get it eventually.” 

“Thanks,” Lance said, breaking into a yawn of his own. “Woah, I think your sleepiness is contagious.”

“I’m almost to my car anyway. See you tomorrow for practice?” Allura said.

Lance nodded. “Yep. See you tomorrow.” 

“Bye.”

They hung up and Lance stretched as he yawned again. Tomorrow was another day of writing and practicing. He’d better get some sleep.

* * *

“Pidge, maybe the rhythm should be different at this part?” Lance suggested, going over to Pidge and notating on their score. “I feel like it should be different.”

The four of them were in Lance’s garage, practicing the first song on their set list. It was the week before the first part of the contest started, and Lance was getting increasingly excited and nervous. Their songs were almost ready, but there were a few things left he wanted to tweak.

“I know what you mean,” Pidge said. They set down their drumsticks and erased the previous rhythm. “Maybe we could space it out more? Should it be more syncopated?”

Lance nodded. “Something like that. Let’s try it.”

They practiced that section with the rhythm change, and Lance felt immediately better about it. “Perfect. That works a lot better.”

Pidge scribbled a note on their score and Lance wrote it down on his as well.

“Okay, everyone,” Lance said, “let’s take a break. We’ve been going for a while.”

The four of them had sheens of sweat on their faces, and Lance could feel his own clammy heat. He loved the way practicing music made him feel. He set his guitar down in its stand and walked over to Allura. 

She took a drink from her water bottle and smiled at him. “How’re you feeling about the set list?”

“Pretty good,” Lance replied. “Would you be mad at me if I tried to hug you right now?”

Allura rolled her eyes in good nature. “I’m already sweaty enough. I don’t need yours added to mine.”

Lance grinned. “Just checking.”

“Hey, guys,” Hunk said from his seat, “what do we know about the competition?”

“I’m glad you asked, Hunk.” Pidge pushed their glasses up, a self-satisfied smirk on their face. “I’ve actually been doing research into the other bands to see what they’re like.”

“Okay, go on then,” Allura said.

Pidge cleared their throat. “Well. There’s a few bands that I can see being a problem for us. One is called Jungle Planet, and they’ve been kind of prolific in their performances so far. Nothing specifically noteworthy, but still they have a bit of a following on social media.” 

“Heh,” Lance snickered. “ _ Note _ worthy.”

Hunk snorted. “Nice.”

Pidge rolled their eyes despite their smile. “Next, there’s Galra Nation, who’ve been slowly building a reputation as having killer guitar and drum solos, as well as specializing in jazz.”

“Okay. So we’ve got to work on our jazz style,” Allura noted, half to herself. 

“Finally there’s The Legendary Defenders, and they’re probably the band we’re gonna’ have the most trouble with. They’ve opened for a few lesser known bands before, and their main member, Keith Kogane, has quite a big fan base already.”

Lance squinted. “Keith Kogane? Where have I heard that name before?”

Pidge shrugged. “You might have seen him in the local news or something.”

“Nah, I don’t watch the news.”

“Then, I dunno’.”

Hunk said something to Allura and she replied, but Lance was in his own world now. Those three bands had followings already, meanwhile their band barely had three people who knew about them. Hard cold resolve formed in Lance’s gut, and he squared his stance. 

“Okay, guys,” he said. “We’re gonna’ win this thing no matter what. Who cares about those other bands? We’ve got our band, and our band is the  _ bomb _ . We’re gonna’ blow everyone else out of the water, and then we’ll win first place!”

“Yeah!” the other three cheered. 

Lance just hoped he could feel as confident as he acted.

* * *

The four of them were standing in the wings of the venue, waiting for their turn on stage. The venue was not as big as Lance had thought it would be, but that was to be expected for the first round of a band contest. The final performances were usually more popular anyway.

Lance let out a deep breath and turned to his friends. “Okay. Dress rehearsal. We don’t have to give it 100%, but let’s give enough to intimidate the other bands. So, like, 85%.”

Pidge rolled their eyes in good nature. “Sure, 85%. Got it.” 

Hunk stretched out his hands, rolling his wrists back and forth. “So, just a practice run?”

“Yep,” Lance replied.

“Don’t worry about this one too much, either,” Allura said quietly. “Just remember that we’ve practiced our songs enough times to have it be muscle memory. Our bodies know what to do.”

Lance smiled at her. Allura always knew what to say. “Right. Let’s give it our 85%, y’all.”

“Yeah!” they whisper-cheered. 

“Next up, The Legendary Defenders,” the MC said, his voice muffled from his place in front of the closed curtain. “Their members are Keith Kogane on guitar and vocals, Takashi Shirogane on bass, Adam Westley on drums, and Shay Balmera on keyboard.” 

“This is them,” Allura whispered to Lance, leaning in to him. “The band that Pidge warned us about.”

Lance nodded, and he felt his gut clench in anticipation. He wanted to hear what this so-called “good” band sounded like. “Yeah. Let’s see how they do.”

He watched from the wings as The Legendary Defenders set up their instruments in a blue-out. A blackout would be too dark for the musicians to set up things properly, so the lighting designers opted for blue-outs during transitions. The only problem was, Lance could still hardly see what the other band looked like. 

They were still setting up when Lance felt a tap on his shoulder. He turned to see a stagehand dressed in all black and with a clipboard around their neck. “The Paladins, right? You guys are up next?”

Lance nodded. “Yeah.”

“Come with me, please.”

Lance gestured to his friends and they followed the stagehand through a door that led them to another part of the backstage, one that wasn’t open to the stage. The door closed behind him and Lance had to hide his disappointment. They’d barely be able to hear The Legendary Defenders now. 

The stagehand gave them a quick smile. “While The Legendary Defenders are getting ready you guys will have to prepare your instruments to be moved on next. We’ll go through a quick practice session right now, but tomorrow you can move your instruments into place as soon as the band before you starts to move.”

The stagehand led the four of them through the movements of moving their instruments into place, which ended up taking a bit longer than anticipated. Disappointment churned in Lance’s gut. He’d have to wait until tomorrow to hear them. 

Finally they finished moving, and Lance went as quickly as he could to the wings to see if he could catch them performing. He opened the door to the wings and heard them play the last chord in their last song, and Lance pouted. Great. 

The curtain closed, and the MC went on to announce Lance’s band next. Allura came up next to him. “You ready?”

Lance looked over at her and smiled. He wasn’t nervous right now, since this was just a rehearsal. “Yeah. We’ve got this.”

Once The Legendary Defenders had finished moving their instruments to the other side of the stage, Lance and his band moved theirs on. It didn’t take long this time, and Lance was proud with how efficiently they’d set everything up. 

The curtains opened, and Lance took a deep breath. This was just a rehearsal. Tomorrow. Tomorrow was the real deal.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i was originally going to update this once a week, but i just kept writing the chapters and getting excited about it so i'm gonna update two times a week instead. enjoy!

“Sorry we didn’t get to hear your rival band, Lance,” Allura said.

Lance sighed as he adjusted the phone in his hand. “That’s okay. We’ll be able to hear them tomorrow, ‘cuz I have a secret plan.”

Allura chuckled. “Oh, really? And what might that be?”

“We’re gonna’ prepare our instruments a band ahead of time. So the band before Kogane’s band will be playing, and we’ll get our instruments ready.”

“Is that really so secret?”

“Yeah, well, you know I’m a drama queen.”

Allura laughed. “Of course, how could I forget. Okay, that sounds good. Make sure you let Pidge and Hunk know as well.”

“Yep.”

“Anyway, I’ve got to sleep now. I’ll see you tomorrow,” Allura said.

Lance grinned. “Mmkay, see you tomorrow.” 

As he hung up the phone he smiled wider to himself. Damn, he really liked Allura. She was awesome in every way, with practically no flaws, and he couldn’t wait to play alongside her tomorrow. Maybe after all this was over he could finally find the courage to tell her how he felt. Lance yawned and stretched in his seat. He should probably get to sleep now too. They had a big day tomorrow.

* * *

The four of them stopped outside the venue. People were slowly trickling in, stopping every now and then to talk to someone else. Lance glanced around to see if he could spot anyone he knew, but so far they were just strangers. Strangers were easier to perform in front of. That way even if he sucked they’d forget about it in a few days.

“Alright, guys, “ Lance said to his band mates. “This is the day of the performance, and I just wanted to say that you guys are frickin’ awesome and we’re gonna’ nail this performance.”

“You bet!” Pidge cheered, slapping their hand on Lance’s back as they grinned broadly. “Not to mention we’ve got an awesome leader.”

“Yeah, this is awesome, Lance,” Hunk agreed. “As soon as we finish this round I’ll bake everyone a huge meal to celebrate.”

“We’re going to do amazing, everyone,” Allura said.

“Let’s head inside,” Lance turned and headed for the back of the venue where they’d be waiting backstage until it was their turn. But luckily for them Lance had his secret plan. He smiled to himself. He’d finally be able to hear Kogane’s band play, and then he’d decide what he was up against.

The backstage was packed with the other band members, several of them carrying their guitars or basses with them to go over their parts before they performed. Lance could feel his heart rate starting to speed up and his stomach start to turn. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. He’d be fine. He’d performed in front of crowds before. Not as many times as he’d have liked to, but something was better than nothing.

The backstage contained a hallway that connected the two wing entrances and two rehearsal rooms that everyone was just using as rooms to hang out in before they went on stage. The dressing room  was at the end of the hallway, which looked more like a fitting room in a clothing store. The four of them went into one of the rehearsal rooms to find a few other bands milling around as well. A lot of people were mingling and chatting together already.

Pidge gasped next to him. “Is that a guy with an Alan Turing t-shirt?!”

Hunk stood up straighter. “What? Where?”

Pidge grabbed Hunk’s arm and started dragging him towards the guy. “Let’s go ask him about complicated science stuff!”

Allura chuckled. “Well, looks like they’re off on their own thing. I saw a friend of mine earlier go into the other rehearsal room, so I’m going to go say hi to her. I’ll see you in a bit.”

Lance nodded. “Yep. See ya’ later.”

Allura left the rehearsal room and, suddenly by himself, Lance started to feel a bit self-conscious. He shook his head. Nah, what was he talking about? Lance was great at socializing! He’d prove it.

He glanced around the room to see if there was anyone he could talk with, then he spotted him. A guy standing by himself in the corner of the room, taking a sip from a thermos and glancing around the room with a lazy expression. The first thing Lance noticed was that the guy was good-looking, like an actor or some TV personality. But then he noticed that the guy’s black hair was longer in the back than it was in the front, and Lance rolled his eyes. Really? Who wears a mullet anymore?

But the guy was also wearing a Nirvana t-shirt and Lance had to be an idiot not to talk to him. Lance made his way over and put on his most confident smile. 

He slid up next to the guy as his head was turned the other way. “So, Nirvana, huh? What’s your favorite album? Mine has got to be Nevermind.”

The guy looked over at him and blinked. “Nirvana? Who’s that?”

Lance glanced at Mullet’s shirt. Nope. He wasn’t hallucinating. It was definitely a Nirvana t-shirt. “Uh, you know, the shirt you’re wearing?”

Mullet raised an eyebrow at Lance like he didn’t know what he was talking about. “Huh?”

Lance felt his whole face heat up and tried to back track. “Uh, well, you know, I thought you would know them ‘cuz you were wearing their shirt and, uh, well, they were such an influential band, and, um . . .”

Mullet broke into a grin and started chuckling. Lance blinked. “Did I miss something?”

The guy shook his head, still chuckling. “No, no, no. I was just jokin’ with ya’. Of course I know who Nirvana is. But the look on your face was too good to ruin.”

Lance folded his arms across his chest. “So, you think you can just play a prank on any random stranger, now do ya?”

Mullet shrugged his shoulders. “Eh, I call ‘em like I see ‘em. You liked like the kinda guy to take a joke so I thought, ‘Why not’?”

Lance gave him a broad grin. “Well, lucky for you, Mullet-Head, I can take a joke. What would you have done if I couldn’t?”

The guy squinted at him with a smirk of disbelief. “‘Mullet-Head’? So you’ve decided to mock my haircut, now?”

Lance gave a shrug of his own. “I figured if you can dish it out, you must be able to take it, right?”

Mullet sighed. “I guess I have no choice. But now I need a snappy name for you too. How ‘bout . . .”

The guy was still thinking of a nickname when Lance heard his name. He turned to see Allura walking towards him. “Lance, my friend wants to meet you. I told her I’d come get you.”

“Coming!” He turned back to Mullet and felt strangely bad about leaving. He’d been starting to enjoy their banter. “Sorry, Mullet-Head. Gotta’ go.”

Mullet rolled his eyes with a good-natured chuckle. “I guess I’m stuck with that now. See ya’ later, then.”

Lance followed Allura out of the room to go meet her friend, and as he walked away he wondered why he was feeling bad about leaving someone he’d only just met. He could feel the guy’s gaze following him out of the room, and it gave Lance a peculiar feeling, one he couldn’t place. 

* * *

“Up next is Attempted Facade,” the MC announced. Lance looked over at the small monitor hooked up in the rehearsal room to see the MC standing in front of the closed curtain.

“This is the band before Kogane’s,” Lance said. He turned to Allura. “Allura, we should find Pidge and Hunk and start getting ready if we want to hear Kogane’s performance.”

Allura’s friend, Romelle, smiled widely. “You’re talking about The Legendary Defenders, aren’t you?”

Lance turned to her. “Yeah, do you know them?”

Romelle gasped. “Know them? How can I not? They’re an awesome band!”

Lance cleared his throat.

Romelle blinked. “Oh, um, I mean, I’m sure you guys will do just as well. Go Allura!”

Allura chuckled. “That’s alright, Romelle.”

“Give it up for Attempted Facade!” the MC said.

Lance glanced at the small monitor to see the curtains pull open. “Allura, we should go now.”

Allura nodded. “Right. I’ll talk to you later, Romelle.”

“Break a leg, guys,” Romelle said, giving them both a thumbs up.

Lance and Allura found Pidge and Hunk in the other rehearsal room still talking to the guy with Alan Turing t-shirt, and Lance quickly looked around for Mullet, surprised to feel a bit disappointed when he wasn’t there. The four of them went to the instrument room and started bringing their instruments to the stage-right wings so they could get ready.

Once they’d put their instruments in place where they could access them quickly, they waited backstage for the current band to finish so they could pull their instruments on at the same time Kogane’s band was setting up.

Attempted Facade finished their song and Hunk opened the door to peer inside. “They’re setting up now. Let’s go!”

The four of them pulled their instruments into the wings and set them up in the proper area just as Kogane’s band was setting theirs up behind the closed curtain. Lance grinned to himself. Now he’d be able to hear them perform the song without interruptions. He was honestly a genius.

“Ready?” Allura said, coming up next to him.

Lance nodded. “Definitely.”

The MC finished announcing Kogane’s band. “Let’s give a warm welcome to The Legendary Defenders!”

The audience erupted into applause and cheers, and Lance frowned. Was Kogane’s band really that well known? Lance swallowed back his jealousy and turned so he could see the stage. He’d make his own decision.

The curtain pulled back and the stage flooded with light. Lance blinked. Once. Twice. Then his jaw dropped. Standing on stage with a sunburst Les Paul Gibson guitar was none other than Mullet-Head himself.

Lance turned to Allura and whispered rapidly, “That’s the guy I was talking to earlier! The guy with the mullet!”

Allura shushed him. “They’re starting!”

Lance turned his gaze so he could see Kogane standing on stage. He was turned so his back was to the audience, gazing at his band mates with a confident smile. He made eye contact with each of them, nodded, and faced the audience again.

Then he started singing.

_ Facing the crowd, you turn to me _

_ I see your smile written there _

_ Almost as if you don’t want me to see _

_ The pain that you cannot bare _

The bass line picked up, playing a fast four-bar phrase to backup Kogane’s words. After a few more measures the other instruments burst in, and the stage was filled with movement. Kogane continued to sing into the mic, glancing at the guitar neck every now and then to assure his movements. He moved into the chorus, and the bassist and the keyboard player joined in singing harmonies that sent chills running across Lance’s skin.

Lance couldn’t blink. He couldn’t move. He couldn’t think. He watched Kogane as if in a trance, and the rest of the world became blurry to him. He could only see Kogane on stage, singing his heart out to a crowd that no longer existed to Lance. Light bounced off Kogane’s hair, his arms, his guitar, his body. It was like he was moving in slow motion. Lance could capture every movement, every detail in this one moment. And most of all, he felt an emotion in his chest that he’d never felt before, something he couldn’t identify.

“He’s . . . amazing,” Lance whispered, barely feeling the words leave his lips.

Then he blinked, and the song was over. The crowd was going wild, and Lance couldn’t believe what had just happened. How had they been so good?

“Lance, are you ready?” Allura said, placing a hand on his shoulder. Lance started and turned to see her with a concerned expression.

His mind went blank for a second before he forced himself to smile. “Yeah. I’m ready. Let’s do our best.”

The curtains closed and the blue out came on behind them, signaling to Lance that it was their turn to move. Kogane started moving his things off stage, and as Lance turned to grab his own guitar he felt something calm down inside him. He was almost always nervous before a big performance, but for some reason he felt totally calm. With his guitar in one hand and his amp in the other he walked on stage, looking at the markers on the ground to make sure he was in the right place.

He pulled his guitar over his head and set his amp down before walking over to help Pidge move their drums on stage. Everything was set up just as quickly as yesterday, but in the dim light he could see the worry on his band mates faces. The MC was still talking, so he gathered them into a small circle.

“Guys, we’re going to do this. We’re an amazing band, and we’re all amazing musicians. We can do this,” Lance said, trying to project his calm and confidence to his friends.

Hunk wavered. “But The Legendary Defenders were so good.”

“And so are we,” Allura added, catching Lance’s attitude. “We haven’t worked this hard for the past few months for nothing, have we?”

“No,” Pidge responded, an excited smile on their face. “We came here to win.”

“And that’s what we’ll do,” Lance said, pulling away. “We’ve got this, guys.”

Lance faced the curtain just in time to hear the MC say, “Please welcome, The Paladins!”

The curtain opened and Lance gazed out at the crowd of people clapping for them. There were probably only a few people in the audience who actually knew of them and their music, but Lance didn’t care at that moment. All he cared about was putting on a fantastic performance. One like Kogane had just done.

The thought of Kogane’s performance calmed Lance down again, and he let out a slow breath. He glanced at Allura to see her give a quick smile. He looked at Pidge and Hunk behind him to see them give nods of encouragement. Lance cheated out a bit so he could see all three of them, and he nodded his head to the quick tempo while mouthing, “One, two, one two three four—”

The four of them started perfectly on time together, and Lance faced the audience as he played the opening chords. He could feel the beat from Pidge’s drums pounding in his stomach, and a wave of adrenaline went through him. It was strange to feel that adrenaline mix with the sense of calm he’d had earlier, but it just made him more pumped to play. Lance stepped up to the mic to start the first verse.

_ The crowd shouts to me that I’ve got it wrong _

_ But I say to them that I know my song _

_ Every tune has got its peace of mind _

_ Don’t ask me if you know what to find _

Another instrumental break for a few measure before Lance jumped back in with the second verse. He could feel his heart pounding in time to the beat, and a smile spread across his face. Lance couldn’t help it. He loved playing.

As he was performing he felt his mind wander, which wasn’t necessarily the best thing for him if he wanted to focus on the song. But Lance’s mind wandered in the direction of Keith Kogane, and the performance he and his band had put on earlier. How had he done it? How had Kogane made Lance feel like he’d been the only person in the audience?

A fire built in Lance’s stomach, and he pulled himself back to the stage. The only thing he should be focusing on right now is giving this audience the performance of a lifetime. Not how good Kogane had looked on stage, or how his clothes had clung to his body as he’d started to sweat.  _ Come on, Lance, get your head out of the gutter! _

Lance sang the last part of the song and finished the riff on his guitar that signaled the end of the song. They cut off and faced the audience, and a chorus of cheers reached his ears. People whooping and cheering for them, and Lance felt a huge smile bloom on his face. This was what all their hard work had been for. This feeling right here.

The curtain closed in front of them and the four of them stood up to move their stuff off stage as quickly as they can, all the while shooting each other broad smiles and exhilarated expressions.

After moving their instruments off stage and setting his guitar down, Lance lunged toward Hunk and enveloped him in a tight embrace. Hunk laughed quietly, squeezing him right back, and Lance moved from him so he could do the same to Pidge and Allura. Pidge protested a bit but eventually relented, and Lance was happy to give them both huge hugs. 

“That was awesome, guys,” Lance said, still breathless from their performance.

“I’ll say.”

Lance turned around to see the faint outline of Kogane in the blue light, a smirk on his ridiculously handsome face. He came up to them and folded his arms across his chest. “You guys have some serious talent. You were amazing on stage.”

The compliment from Kogane made Lance warm from head to toe, and he puffed out his chest to try and mask how happy Kogane’s words had made him. “Yeah, w-well, you guys were pretty good too.”

“Thanks.” Kogane shifted his gaze to Lance. “I still have to come up with a snappy nickname for you, though. Maybe during the second round.” He winked and moved past them to join his band, and Lance felt something giddy turn in his stomach.

“Uh, did that just happen?” Hunk asked, his eyes wide.

“I think we just got complimented by Keith Kogane,” Pidge whispered, their mouth slack-jawed with awe.

Allura chuckled. “So that was ‘Mullet-Head’, I think you called him?”

Heat traveled up Lance’s neck and covered his face, and he coughed into his fist. “Yeah, well, I didn’t know who he was. Can you blame me?”

Allura smiled. “No. Now let’s get our stuff out of here, shall we?”


	3. Chapter 3

Lance couldn’t sleep. And when Lance couldn’t sleep, it was usually because he couldn’t stop thinking about something. Usually it was song ideas or cool things he’d seen in movies. Sometimes it was Allura. He’d think about something cute she’d said that day or he’d imagine what it would be like to be together. Tonight’s theme: Keith Kogane.

Lance sighed and turned over. Why couldn’t he stop thinking about him? Ever since he’d seen Kogane’s performance he’d been playing it over and over in his mind. Lance closed his eyes and replayed it again. Was it crazy to think he remembered every detail? He remembered everything about it. The way he’d looked, the way he’d sounded, the way the light had bounced off the sweat on Kogane’s skin. Lance sighed again. There was definitely something weird going on.

And it wasn’t just the fact that Lance couldn’t stop thinking about him. It was that whenever Lance thought about him there was this . . . feeling in his chest. He couldn’t describe it, exactly, and the fact that he couldn’t place it annoyed him. He thought it felt kind of similar to when he’d had intense crushes on girls before.

Lance blinked at that and sat up in bed. Then he laughed. There was no way what he was feeling was like a crush. He was straight, for crying out loud. Lance shook his head and laughed at the thought. Him, having a crush on Keith Kogane. What a ridiculous idea. Lance thought it was more like . . . admiration? Yeah, that was the word. And maybe a bit of jealousy. Lance admired Kogane in a way that he’d never felt before. It was probably because Kogane was such a great musician. Yeah, that was probably why.

Thinking about Kogane’s talent made Lance motivated to play. Actually, it made him motivated to outdo him. Lance wanted to play on stage and have people say he was better than Kogane. He wanted to stand side by side and have people choose him over Kogane.

“Okay!” Lance declared, shooting his fists up into the air. “Keith Kogane, from now on I am your rival and you are mine! From now on it’s a battle of the bands!”

Nobody replied.

Lance felt heat paint his cheeks as he slid down in bed. Of course nobody replied because there was nobody else here. He sighed. He should really get some sleep. And stop thinking about Keith Kogane.

* * *

“Tall cappuccino for Terry!” Lance called out. He set the drink down and didn’t wait to see if the customer picked it up before moving back to the station to make the next order. Working at a coffee shop was generally just pulling levers, pressing buttons, and doing things that had Lance’s eyes glazing over at the end of his shift.

Today was one of those days where Lance was a little foggy. He’d had a weird dream that he couldn’t fully remember, and he was paying the price for his lack of sleep. He’d already been yelled at once today, and he was determined for that to be the last time.

“Hey, Brent says you can go on break in ten minutes,” Grant said, coming from the back door.

Lance nodded. He and Grant were work friends, and they got along pretty well. “Okay.”

The bell over the door rung to indicate a new customer and Lance glanced over. Then he did a double take. Like, an actual double take. Lance blinked and tried to tell if he was dreaming. Nope. He was actually here. Keith Kogane was actually in the cafe that Lance was working at right this second.

“Oh crap,” Lance said.

“You okay there, buddy?” Grant asked, coming up behind him.

“Um, uh, ah, er,” Lance stammered, barely able to form a coherent sentence. His heart was beating wildly in his chest, and the butterflies in his stomach were having a rave or some kind of party where everyone head-bangs until they pass out.

Grant glanced over his shoulder and made a sound of approval. “Who is that?”

Lance shook his head. This made no sense. Just ‘cuz he admired Kogane and had declared him his rival didn’t mean Lance had to become a blubbering mess as soon as he saw him. _Keep it together, Lance._

Kogane walked up to the counter, his eyes on his phone. He looked up and recognition passed across his features. “Well, look who it is. I didn’t know you were gonna’ be here, McClain.”

Lance could feel his heart doing a tap dance, which irritated him. “Uh, y-yeah. I work here. Didn’t you know that, Mullet-head?”

Kogane sighed. “I’m never going to live that down, am I?”

Lance shook his head, feeling a little more comfortable. “Nope. Not until you come up with something as well, remember?”

Kogane nodded. “Right, I remember. Are you ready for round two?”

“You bet.”

“Well, I’ll be sure to meet you in the wings.” Kogane winked, and Lance could have sworn he’d just suffered from some kind of brain injury. All coherent thoughts left Lance’s mind, and he had no idea what to say except hrghasdlfkahhg.

“U-um, f-for sure,” he stammered. _Think, Lance!_ “Uh, by the way! I’m your rival now!” Lance forced himself to say something, anything, and what came out of his mouth was definitely not his brightest moment.

Kogane raised an eyebrow at him. “Oh, really? So we’re gonna’ go head to head?”

Lance nodded furiously, crossing his arms in an exaggerated gesture. “Yep! So you’d, uh, better get used to it!”

Kogane looked like he was trying hard to stifle a laugh, and not only did Lance feel his entire face heat up, he also felt like he wanted to be anywhere else but here at this moment. “Well, I look forward to doing battle with you in the future. But for now if I could get a large latte that’d be great.”

Yep. Lance definitely didn’t want to be here right now. He could feel the steam rising from his face as he rang Kogane up. Lance got to work making his order, ignoring the way Grant was staring at him like he’d fallen from another planet.

When he finished the order he placed it on the counter top, muttering, “Grande latte for Keith,” in the grumbliest voice Lance could manage.

Kogane, who had been standing next to the counter, picked up his drink and raised it at Lance. “I’ll see you around, McClain.”

As soon as the door closed behind Kogane, Lance planted his face on the counter and let out a groan. He felt a hand on his shoulder and turned to see Grant looking at him with a mixture of concern and amusement. “You okay there, bud? What the hell happened just now?”

Lance went back to facing the granite surface. “I don’t wanna’ talk about it. He’s just someone I’m up against in a band competition, and he’s, like, one of the best musicians I’ve ever seen. So that’s great.”

Grant hummed in surprise. “Really? Just a competitor?”

Lance looked over at him again. “Yeah. And my self-proclaimed ‘rival’ I guess. God, I can’t believe I said that.”

Grant folded his arms across his chest and gave Lance a curious look. “Huh. That looked more like a crush than a rivalry.”

Lance immediately pulled away from the counter, taking a step away from Grant. “What?! Dude, that’s crazy! There’s no way I have a crush on Keith Kogane!”

Grant blinked and held up his hands, one side of his mouth coming up in a grin. “Dude, relax. I’m not saying it’s a bad thing. You know that I’m gay, right?”

“Wait, what?”

Grant laughed. “I never mentioned it ‘cuz it never came up in conversation, but yeah. I’m gay, dude. And I’m saying that _that_ , right there, that just happened? That looked like you trying desperately to hide the fact that you’re crazy attracted to that guy. Not that I’d blame you, of course. He _was_ gorgeous.”

The thought of Grant finding Kogane attractive sent discomfort rolling through Lance’s stomach. Which was weird, because Lance had never and _didn’t_ have a problem with LGBT+ people. Hell, two of his band members were part of that group and he didn’t think twice about it. So why were Grant’s words sending such an uncomfortable sensation through him?

Lance folded his arms in front of him and frowned. “Well, I’m not into him. I have a crush on someone else, anyway.”

Grant raised an eyebrow. “Oh, really? Well, good luck with him.”

“It’s a girl,” Lance grit out.

Grant placed a hand on Lance’s shoulder. “Whoever it is, I hope your ‘rivalry’ with that guy goes well.”

He went back to his station chuckling, leaving Lance to go on break. Lance sighed heavily. He didn’t know why he’d such an intense reaction to Kogane. But he was one-hundred-and-ten percent certain it wasn’t a crush.

* * *

“Lance. Lance? Lance!”

Lance blinked and snapped out his thoughts. He looked over to see Pidge looking at him with a quizzical expression on their face. They adjusted their glasses. “Are we gonna’ practice the song again or not?”

“Yeah,” Lance said, shaking his head. “A few more times and we can take a break.”

Lance, Pidge, Hunk, and Allura were gathered in Lance’s garage practicing their song for the second round. They started the song, and Lance concentrated on playing the riffs correctly. He wanted to be better. No, he needed to be better. Better than Kogane. Lance mentally stopped himself from going there. He couldn’t think about Kogane right now, or about what Grant had said earlier. He needed to focus on practicing.

A particularly challenging riff was coming up and Lance poured all his attention on the fret board. He managed to pull the riff off perfectly, and recognized himself getting into his flow. He played the rest of the song perfectly as well, and when the song finished he was breathing heavily.

What would Kogane say if he saw Lance play that song? Would he be impressed? Would he brush it off? Would he compliment Lance again? Lance wondered what his reaction would be. Then he chastised himself for wondering about that.

“Lance, are you listening?” Allura asked him.

Lance glanced over at her. “Uh, what?”

“We were just saying that this was probably our best run of the song yet,” Hunk filled him in. “You nailed that guitar solo as well.”

Lance nodded with a small smile. “Yeah, I thought so too. About the group, I mean, not just about me. Uh, we can all take a break now if you guys want.”

Pidge shrugged. “Sounds good to me.”

Allura checked her watch. “Oh, I’ve got to get going. I have a meeting with the counselor from school to talk about my classes next quarter.” She hastily packed up her stuff and headed for the door leading back to the house. “Bye, everyone.”

“Bye!” Hunk and Pidge said together.

“See ya,” Lance said, and turned back to looking at his guitar. He plunked a few notes of the earlier riff slowly, getting his fingers to take their time so he could fully memorize the feeling.

He suddenly realized it was weirdly silent, and he looked back to see Pidge and Hunk staring at him, their eyes squinted in suspicion. “Uhhhh. Why are you guys staring at me?”

“Something’s different,” Pidge muttered.

Hunk nodded. “Yep. Something’s definitely different.”

Lance forced an awkward laugh. “Yeah, right. Nothing’s different, guys.”

“No, there’s something different,” Pidge repeated. “You’ve been basically absent the entire rehearsal except when you’re playing, you don’t respond until we call you for the fifth time, and to top it all off, you haven’t hit on Allura once today. Do you still have a crush on her?”

Lance felt a blush paint his cheeks, and a bit of irritation swirled in his gut. “What are talking about? Of course I do! She’s beautiful, kind, and smart. Of course I still have a crush on her.”

Hunk raised an eyebrow. “Okay, whatever you say. You just seemed a bit off today. Are you worried about the second round?”

“Maybe he’s worried about going up against Keith Kogane again,” Pidge said, turning to Hunk.

Lance stood up. “Nononono, no, there’s no way. I’m perfectly capable of standing up to Kogane. There’s absolutely no way thinking about him could mess me up. Nope.”

Now Pidge and Hunk were definitely looking at him weird. “There were a lot of ‘no’s there, buddy,” Hunk said. “You’ve been worried about him, haven’t you?”

Lance felt his entire face heat up at the thought of Kogane. Then Grant’s comment from work rang in his ears, and he couldn’t stop his gut from churning. “I-I haven’t been! Absolutely not! And, and besides. Why would I be worried about st-stupid Keith Kogane? You know he actually pisses me off! With, with that stupid mullet, acting like he’s better than everyone else. Who does he think he is? J-just ‘cuz he’s good at guitar and singing and performing doesn’t mean he’s a good person. I told him I declared myself his rival, and he just laughed it off! What an asshole!”

Pidge and Hunk were staring at him wide-eyed and open-mouthed. Lance’s incoherent rambling finally sunk in to him, and he could swear he was as bright as a tomato right about now. He sent a silent prayer that his skin tone would hide most of the blush.

“A-anyway, what I’m trying to say is that I’m not worried about him at all,” Lance finished lamely, crossing his arms.

Pidge and Hunk exchanged a bewildered glance before looking back at Lance. Hunk looked like he was trying hard not to laugh and Pidge was smiling when they shrugged. “Okay, Lance. Whatever you say.”

Lance groaned. “Ugh. Whatever. Let’s just end rehearsal here.” He took his guitar off and placed it back on its stand before heading into the house and up to the bathroom to shower.

* * *

Lance couldn’t sleep. And when Lance couldn’t sleep, it was usually because he couldn’t stop thinking about something. Tonight’s theme, for the second night in a row, was Keith bloody Kogane.

Lance couldn’t believe he was still thinking of that mullet-wearing idiot. But Grant had gotten in Lance’s head. Lance didn’t want Grant to think he was gay. He wasn’t gay. Was he?

“No, Lance,” he spoke aloud. “Don’t go down roads that are only going to lead to more confusion. You’ve been straight your entire life, there’s no reason you’d be gay now.”

Lance rolled over and tried to get the image of Kogane out of his head so he could finally get some sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello friends, here's chapter 3! just a note that comments are really appreciated and i would love to hear any feedback you have! it helps me know whether you're interested or not c: hope you liked it!


	4. Chapter 4

“Everyone packed in?” Hunk asked, turning in the front seat to look back at everyone. Lance responded with everyone else that they were good to go, and Hunk pulled the van out of the driveway. 

The four of them were headed to the venue to set up for the second round. They’d all agreed to get there early so that they could squeeze in some extra practice and make sure they were ready. Lance felt pretty confident about their second song, but a little more practice couldn’t hurt. He knew his band members felt the same. 

They reached the venue and started unpacking their instruments, bringing them in through the door that led to the rehearsal room hallway. There was barely anyone in the venue with them, just a few stagehands preparing some extra things. Lance helped Pidge with their drums into one of the rehearsal rooms that he was pleased to find empty. They set up the drums, plugged their amps into the walls, and were all set to go. 

“Okay, guys,” Lance said. “Let’s start from the bridge before the last chorus. We can start around the part where Hunk has his solo.”

Hunk nodded and Pidge timed them in. They started off a little out of sync, but Lance didn’t mind since they were starting in the middle of the song. They quickly got into their rhythm and played through until the end of the song, and when they finished Lance was assured that they were ready.

“This is great, guys,” Lance said, sitting in a nearby chair. “We’ll nail this performance as well.”

“Well, it would help if we knew where we stood after each round,” Pidge commented, slouching on their stool. “They don’t tell us if we pass or not until after all three rounds are over.”

“I like the way it is now,” Hunk replied. “I mean, I wouldn’t want to work on three songs if we only got to perform one of them, ya know?”

Allura nodded. “That’s true.”

Lance stood up from his chair and stretched, setting his guitar down after. “I’m gonna’ head to the bathroom. Be right back.”

He headed into the hallway and to the bathroom, taking his time since he knew they weren’t in a rush. When he came out he turned the corner back into the hallway, but stopped in his tracks when he saw another band coming in from the entrance. But not just any band.  _ Keith Kogane’s _ band. 

Lance swallowed and his gut twisted into a bundle of nerves. A part of his mind that wasn’t freaking out was questioning why he’d reacted like this both times he’d seen Kogane. Come to think of it, ever since he met Kogane he’d started reacting weirdly to him. But Lance didn’t have time to think about that right now.  Kogane was talking to another band member, a tall man with short black hair and a tuft of white hair in the front, but when he spotted Lance he stopped. He said something to his friend and walked over towards Lance, who was mentally preparing himself for the exchange. 

“Hey, McClain,” Kogane said. “What are you doing here so early?” 

“N-none of your business, Mullet-Head,” Lance stammered. “My band and I came here to . . . to practice a bit before we perform.” Lance blinked and took in the way Kogane looked, and he felt that weird feeling in his chest again. Kogane’s hair was tied back in a small ponytail, and the red jacket he was wearing looked good on him. Like,  _ really _ good. Woah. Why did Lance think he was so good-looking?

Kogane folded his arms. “If it’s none of my business, why did you just tell me what you were doing?”

Crap. Lance swallowed again. “Uhhhhh, ‘cuz I-I, um. Whatever! I’m gonna’ go practice, do you wanna' come with me or not?”

_ What was he doing?! _ Lance didn’t want Kogane in the same  _ building _ as him, let alone the same room. Having Kogane in the same room as him would only serve to make him pissed off and nervous, and he couldn’t focus on playing his best like this. 

Kogane looked surprised. “I thought I was your rival. Now you want to practice in the same room?”

Lance could’ve smacked himself. “O-of course not! Well, it’s not like, you know, I’m telling what you can and can’t do, and of course being your rival doesn’t necessarily mean we can’t be in the same room, but then again being your rival probably means that we shouldn’t be in the same room because then we would hear each other play and then—”

“Woah, woah,” Kogane stopped him, holding up his hands in surrender. He looked amused and Lance cursed his rambling mouth. “It’s fine. There’s other people showing up around this time, anyway, so it’s better to rehearse around someone you can actually tolerate, right?”

Keith walked over to the closest practice room and Lance blinked. He turned around. “Wait, what?”

Keith chuckled and opened the door, gesturing for his band mates to follow suit. Lance turned back around to see the other members of his band walking over. The guy with the white tuft of hair stopped in front of him while the others continued. 

“I’m Shiro,” he said, extending his hand. Lance, kind of in a daze, took it. “Keith’s told me a lot about you. He said you’re probably his biggest competition here.”

Lance’s brain blanked. “Uhhhhhhhh.”

Shiro laughed. “It’s that surprising, huh?”

Lance shook his head. “No. Well, yes, but mostly because I thought Kogane would be way above my level.”

Shiro gestured towards the door. “That’s not what  _ he  _ thinks. Let’s just have fun before we perform, shall we?”

Lance followed Shiro in through the door to see his band mates already chatting with Kogane’s. Pidge and Hunk were talking with Kogane and the keyboard player, Shay. Allura was already getting along with the tall guy with glasses, and Lance waited for the jealousy that usually accompanied seeing Allura talking to other guys. Except it didn’t. Before Lance could process that he saw Pidge wave him over, and he shook his head to clear his mind before joining them.

“Look, look!” Pidge cried. “It’s The Legendary Defenders!”

Lance rolled his eyes, pointing his thumb to where Kogane was sitting. “Yeah, I know. I’d recognize that mullet anywhere.”

“Hey, my hair’s in a ponytail today,” Kogane protested, folding his arms across his chest.

Lance scoffed, feeling more comfortable around his friends. “Psh, doesn’t mean you don’t have a mullet.”

“I have got to find a name for you or I’ll be stuck without a retort,” Kogane complained. 

“How ‘bout ‘Lover-boy Lance’?” Pidge piped up.

Lance whipped around. “Shut up about that, Pidge!”

Hunk snickered. “Heh. I remember that.”

Lance glared at him, feeling his embarrassment creeping up his face. “Hunk, I swear on my guitar I will strangle you.”

Kogane let out a short laugh, and Lance turned to see him struggling to hold back a smile. “‘Lover-boy Lance’? Where did that come from?”

“Lance was practicing one-liners so he could ask Allura out and Pidge caught him saying that to himself in the mirror,” Hunk told him, trailing off into a giggle.

A brief flash of surprise passed over Kogane’s face before he looked over with an expression Lance couldn’t identify. “You and Allura?”

Before Lance could reply Pidge chimed in with, “Yeah, he’s had the hots for her ever since they met.”

“But we’re not together,” Lance added, to his own surprise. He met Kogane’s gaze and swallowed. 

Kogane held Lance’s gaze for a second, but Lance swore it felt like a year. A small smirk pulled at Kogane’s mouth. “Good to know. Guess I’ll start calling you Lover-Boy from now on.”

“Please don’t,” Lance said.

“Too late. It’s happening.”

“Come on, dude.”

“Nope. If you can call me Mullet-Head, I reserve the right to call you Lover-Boy. Or is that going to be a problem for you?”

It was very much a problem for Lance, whose patience was reaching its end. “Kogane, don’t you dare.”

A muscle in Kogane’s jaw twitched and he stood up. Lance felt his stomach bunch as he realized Kogane was mad. “What’re you gonna’ do, McClain? Practice cussing me out in front of a mirror?”

Anger burned in Lance’s chest and he took a step forward. “Not a chance, Mullet-Head! I’m gonna . . . gonna . . .”  _ Come up with something, quick! _ “I’m gonna challenge you to a riff off!”

Hunk and Pidge, who’d been watching the exchange with wide eyes, said together, “Huh?”

Kogane blinked. Clearly he hadn’t been expecting that response. “What?”

Okay, Lance had let his big mouth run. Now he had to back it up. “You heard what I said. I told you, we’re rivals. So, uh, if you want to call me Lover-Boy so badly, you’ve got to beat me in a riff off. Otherwise I’m gonna’ call you Mullet-Head until I’m blue in the face!” 

Kogane’s eyes narrowed. “Fine. Let’s battle it out, then.” Kogane left to get his guitar and Lance walked over to his with Hunk and Pidge on his heels. 

“Dude, what do you think you’re doing?!” Hunk hissed. “That’s Keith Kogane, dude. Keith Kogane!”

“I know who he is!” Lance snapped. It wasn’t fair to take out his irritation on Hunk, but he didn’t care. Kogane was getting on his nerves. “And I don’t care.” 

Pidge sighed. “Let him go, Hunk. You know how stubborn he is.”

Pidge’s words were fuel to Lance’s fire, and as he brought his guitar back to where Kogane was standing Lance wondered why he was getting so fired up. He wondered why  _ Kogane _ was so fired up. He had seemed fine when Lance had called him Mullet-Head before, but maybe Lance had been wrong. Maybe he’d misjudged Kogane’s tolerance of that nickname. Oh, crap, what if he’d been wrong this entire time?

But Lance couldn’t dwell on those thoughts when Kogane was waiting for him to start the battle. Guitar riff offs generally had one rule: play until you make a mistake. It was a mix of improvisation and playing from memory, and seeing Kogane’s intense expression just made Lance more determined. Lance plugged his guitar in to the amp, took a deep breath, and started playing.

He started off with something easy. A simple melody that anyone could play, but wasn’t boring. Lance played a few repeats of it with some simple variations, and Kogane readied his pick to play. Kogane bounced off of Lance’s idea, adding some more complex variations and techniques as Lance played his version. 

“Come on, Lover-Boy,” Kogane said, his eyes fixed on Lance’s. “What else can you do?”

Those words sent a jolt of electricity through Lance, and his skin tingled with energy. He ramped up his playing, building off of Kogane’s riff by making it more impressive. He started adding chords to his melody, basing it purely off of instinct and muscle memory of his guitar. A few cheers went up around him, and a quick glance told Lance they’d attracted a bit of a crowd. 

But Lance’s gaze quickly settled back on Kogane. Kogane’s eyes narrowed and he swallowed. As Lance continued playing chords Kogane sent his fingers flying across the fret board, moving his pick perfectly in time. The harmony from Lance’s chords and Kogane’s lead sent shivers through Lance, hot and cold at the same time. 

“Whoo!” Pidge yelled. “Go Lance!” 

“You’ve got this, Keith,” Shiro cheered.

Lance’s eyes were still locked on Kogane’s. And as they continued to play and up their game one after the other, Lance found that the rest of the world was falling away. He didn’t know what was going on around him, and he didn’t care. The only thing he could see, the only thing he could hear was Kogane. The only thing he could hear was  _ Keith _ . 

Lance could feel them nearing the end of the phrase. He shredded out some higher chords in the hopes that Keith would see where he was going, and Keith changed his playing to let them reach the end. They ended at the same time with the same chord an octave apart, with the two of them breathing heavily and somehow only a few feet apart. 

Cheers erupted around them, reminding Lance of the outside world, but Lance was noticing little details about Keith’s face that he hadn’t before. Like a small scar above one eyebrow. Or how his eyes weren’t brown like Lance had originally thought, but a dark grey. Wow, he was attractive. Keith’s lips were slightly parted as he caught his breath, and his gaze flitted across Lance’s face. Lance’s stomach fluttered and swirled and he felt like his skin was on fire, but more than anything he felt an intense desire to be closer to Keith. 

Reality slammed into Lance and he blinked, breaking the illusion. He took a step back and swallowed. People were still cheering them on from the crowd but Lance felt like he’d been slapped in the face. What had just happened? 

Pidge ran up to him and flung themself at him, wrapping him in a tight hug. “Lance, that was awesome! Where did you learn to do that?”

Hunk came up to them and hugged the two of them. “That was so frickin’ cool, dude!”

Allura walked up to him next, her eyes wide and a huge smile on her face. “I’d have to agree. That was quite the spectacle, Lance. Seriously impressive.”

A week ago a compliment like that from Allura would have had Lance jumping in the air and whooping with joy. But right now the only thing he was feeling was confusion, and a strange mix of desire and panic. 

He glanced back at Keith, who was receiving similar praise from his own band members and others who’d come to talk to him. Had Lance imagined that earlier? That feeling of being the only two people in the world? Keith smiled at something Adam said, but the smile seemed forced. Keith caught Lance’s gaze and Lance immediately looked away. The burning sensation in his gut was too much. He didn’t understand what was happening to him. 

A sound horn suddenly went off in the room and everyone jumped. Lance looked towards the door to see a stagehand holding a clipboard. “Places for the top of the show, please! We start in ten!” 

Lance excused himself from his band to go to the bathroom and try and calm himself down. He knew he wouldn’t be able to sort through his torrent of emotions right now, but he also knew he’d have to address them sooner or later. What the hell was going on with Keith Kogane?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> quickly posting this before i go to class. i'm sick and i feel like death :))


	5. Chapter 5

The second round progressed just as smoothly as the first one. Better, Lance thought. Lance’s friends had been pumped up after the riff off and had released all their energy into the performance. Lance barely remembered how he’d performed, but it had apparently been good. He’d watched Keith’s performance again and it had filled him with energy. He simply remembered the desire to be better than Keith before Lance had gone on stage.

Now Lance was sitting in the back seat of the van staring at a spot on the floor. He’d hardly said anything since they’d packed up their stuff and left. Lance didn’t think he could accurately describe what he was feeling. There were so many things going through his mind, most of them about Keith, and Lance didn’t know what to think of any of them. But one thing he did know was that he dreaded going home. Because once he got home, he knew he’d be alone with his thoughts. 

“Lance?” Allura said quietly. Hunk and Pidge were chattering amongst themselves in the front, paying them no mind.

Lance looked up from the floor. “Yeah?”

“Are you alright? You’ve been kind of . . . silent since our performance.”

A bolt of panic flashed through him, leaving his heart pounding. “Uh, y-yeah. I’m fine.”

Allura looked more concerned. “Are you sure?”

Lance forced a smile. “Yep. Just tired, I guess.”

Allura didn’t press it further, and soon the four of them were at the house. They unloaded the instruments into the garage, and Lance told his friends that he was gonna’ go to bed early. 

Every step up the stairs felt like an eternity, and Lance was getting increasingly nervous. His heart sank into his stomach, and Lance swallowed to get rid of the dry feeling in his throat. He shouldn’t be this nervous right now. He sat at his desk and opened his computer.

“Okay, first thing’s first, Lance,” he muttered to himself. “Let’s make a list.”

This was one of the things that helped Lance the most to figure out his own emotions. He’d sit at his computer and type out a list of things he knew he was feeling, ask himself questions about where he thought those feelings were coming from, and then write down possible answers. Lance would slowly narrow it down until he felt like he understood himself better.

Lance opened a new doc and started typing. 

 

  * __Whenever Kogane’s around I feel nervous__


  * _Whenever Kogane’s around I feel pissed_


  * _I can’t stop thinking about him?_


  * _Kogane is actually really good-looking?_


  * _During the riff off I felt . . ._



 

Lance stopped typing. He couldn’t bring himself to type out what he was thinking in his head. Because if Lance was right about what he was thinking, then that meant a conclusion that Lance  _ rrreeeaaalllyyyy _ didn’t want to acknowledge. Because the most logical conclusion for why he was feelings these things was. . . Lance took a deep breath and opened his web browser.

There it was. The Google homepage. Truly, a magnificent search engine. The best one out there, actually. Who even uses Yahoo or Bing these days?

Lance sighed. He knew what he needed to search up, and he was just stalling by contemplating the many different types of internet search engines. He steeled himself against his racing heart, swallowed, and started typing with shaking hands.

_ How do i know if i like a guy when i am a guy _

Over a billion search results popped up, and Lance’s eyes widened as he took it all in. Where would he even start? A quiz? Yeah, like that would tell him anything. Those kinds of quizzes were almost always things like, “do you like guys or girls?”, and that was the whole thing Lance was trying to figure out.

He settled for clicking on the wikipedia page for the LGBT group. As he was reading through it his eye caught on the term “kinsey scale”. So he did a search for that and was more satisfied with the results that time around. He clicked on the first link and ended up at a site where he could see where he’d place on the kinsey scale.

Before he looked at the first question, Lance paused. Was this really what he wanted to be doing? Did he really want to know the answer to that question? If he was . . . what Lance thought he was, what would that mean for him? He would have to come out to his friends, his family, and pretty much everyone who knew him and would come to know him. His stomach churned with panic at the thought of even telling his friends.

Lance knew they would accept him. With Pidge being non-binary and Hunk being asexual, it’s not like they were strangers to those kinds of things. But Lance was still anxious about it. He didn’t like the fact that people’s perception of him would change. 

But at the same time, Lance didn’t know if what he felt for Keith was attraction or not. Okay, well Lance was attracted to Keith, in the broadest sense of the term. He felt a pull towards Keith that he couldn’t understand or describe. There was just something about him. He wanted to be near him. And that annoyed him to all hell and back.

Lance blinked as something dawned on him. How did he know he was attracted to Keith  _ romanticall y _ _?_ How did he know it wasn’t just friendship? Lance chuckled to himself, and that chuckle soon turned into laughter. God, he was such an idiot! He’d assumed this entire time that he’d had a crush on Keith when he  _ obviously _ just wanted to be friends with him! 

Lance let himself calm down from laughing and took in a deep breath. He’d been worried over nothing this whole time. Of course he wasn’t gay. He still had a crush on Allura, after all. He’d start by being friends with Keith, and he’d forget this whole sexuality crisis ever happened. 

* * *

With the second round done with, they only had one more round to go through and see if they made it to the next part. During rehearsal that day Pidge reminded them that the next part of the contest would be a battle royale. They’d be pitted against one band after another, and whoever performed better would advance until there were six bands left.

“So, how many songs would we have to write if we make it through?” Hunk asked. 

“Three,” Pidge replied. “The remaining bands will be separated into two blocks, and there’s three rounds. If we win every round, we go to the finals.” 

“So every band needs to prepare three songs,” Allura said.

Pidge nodded. “Yep. Everyone wants to win.”

Lance stood up from where he was sitting. “Gotcha. We’ll just need to become even better by then.”

“Not you, mister ‘I had a riff off with Keith Kogane and won’,” Hunk teased, waggling his eyebrows at him. 

Lance rolled his eyes. “Yeah, right. We tied, at best. It was never even decided who won.”

“What’s this?” Allura asked, squinting at him with a cheeky smile. “Lance McClain doesn’t want to boast over something? Who are you and what have you done with Lance?”

Pidge and Hunk laughed, and Lance chuckled. It was weird. He didn’t feel like there’d been a clear winner in that battle. Well, he definitely looked up to Keith. He’d come to terms with that last night. But in that riff off, he’d felt on equal terms with him. 

Lance shook his head. “Alright, guys. Let’s do one more round and then I’ll go out and get everyone pizza.”

“Pizza!” Pidge cheered. 

“Oh, actually Lance,” Hunk started, “could you pick up some strap buttons at Guitar Center for me? I think mine are coming a bit loose.”

Lance nodded. “Sure.” They practiced their song with a few bumps, but nothing that couldn’t be fixed during the week. Lance put his guitar away and went up for a quick shower before getting in his car and heading to Guitar Center. He’d pick up the strap buttons before getting the pizza. The pizza would take a while to make anyway. 

He entered the store and stood for a second, taking it in. He loved going to the music store. Guitars and basses covered the wall to his right floor to ceiling. There was a section for keyboards, orchestra, mixing and producing, drums, microphones, pretty much anything. It was a musician’s paradise. Lance smiled to himself and went over to the guitar section. 

As he was browsing the aisles trying to find the strap buttons, he didn’t look where he was going and bumped into someone. Lance stumbled back a step. “Oh, sorry.”

Then his eyes widened as he recognized who was standing in front of him. “Kei—, I mean, Kogane?”

Keith looked at him with a surprised expression. “McClain. I, uh, wasn’t expecting to see you here.”

The usual nervousness that Lance experienced around Keith started swirling in his belly. But this time he knew it was just because he just admired him.  _ Remember, Lance. Let’s try to be friends with him _ . “Yeah, uh, I’m just getting some extra strap buttons for Hunk. I mean, my bassist.” 

Keith nodded. “I remember. He had that really good solo in your second song.”

It was Lance’s turn to be surprised. “You stayed to listen to my song?”

Keith raised an eyebrow. “Of course. You guys are good.”

Keith’s praise had Lance filling with happiness, and he tried to keep his smile in check. “Th-thanks.” 

The two of them held each other’s gaze for a second. Then two. Lance was wondering why Keith wasn’t saying anything, but he seemed to be contemplating something.

“McClain, about the other day,” Keith began.

“Do you want to join me for pizza?” Lance blurted. Wow. He hadn’t expected to say that. He hadn’t even planned that. It was like Lance had felt the impulse for a split second and his brain had said, ‘screw it’, and had gone with it.

Keith blinked. Then looked confused. “What?”

“I mean, my band and I are having pizza tonight,” Lance back-tracked. “I’m actually going to pick it up right now, and I was wondering if you wanted to join us? You don’t have to, obviously, but I just felt bad about the other day, and I—”

“Wait,” Keith stopped him. “You felt bad about the other day?”

Lance nodded sheepishly and rubbed the back of his neck. “Yeah. I felt like I was an ass to you when I didn’t have to be. I won’t call you Mullet-Head if you don’t want me to.”

Keith’s expression was unreadable, but after a second he chuckled. “That’s okay. And you don’t have to apologize.” He averted his gaze, looking embarrassed. “I was an ass, too. I got a little . . . jealous. And I overreacted. Sorry, McClain.”

Jealous? What did Keith have to be jealous over? Whatever. Lance grinned and extended his hand. “Let’s start over then. I’m Lance McClain, but just ‘Lance’ is fine. Do you wanna’ be friends?”

Keith eyed his hand and grinned back. “I’m Keith Kogane, but you can call me Keith. And being friends sounds good.” 

He took Lance’s hand and Lance felt a sensation go through his body that was gone almost instantly. They shook hands while looking at each other and Lance’s chest tightened with an exhilarating feeling. It made him want to run and jump and whoop with joy. Is that what being friends with someone he admired felt like? Lance didn’t want to leave this feeling.

Keith retracted his hand, though. “And yes, by the way. I think I’ll join you for pizza. If we’re being friends now.”

Lance’s face lit up with a smile. “Great! I’ll just go check out and we can go over to the pizza place and then I’ll show you the way home.”

“Why don’t you just text me your address?” Keith suggested. “I’ll meet you there. I still have some stuff to do here.”

“Oh. Sure.”

Lance brought out his phone and exchanged numbers with Keith, hoping to hide the fact that his hands were quivering. As he left the store with Hunk’s strap buttons, Lance felt lighter than air. He felt like he could run a hundred miles without stopping. Lance couldn’t remember the last time he’d felt this happy to be friends with someone. 

A huge smile bloomed on his face as he thought about that again. Lance was friends with Keith Kogane. And Keith was friends with him. Lance got in his car and blasted his music through the speakers, singing along to it with all his heart. 

* * *

Lance pulled up in his driveway to see Keith leaned against his car parked on the curb. He stood up when he saw Lance, and Lance got out of his car with the pizza in tow.

“Ready?” Lance asked, a ridiculous smile on his face. His heart was beating like crazy and he was still nervous, but it was the kind of nervous he felt before he performed. A mixture of excitement and adrenaline. 

Keith gave his usual light smile and nodded, following Lance to the front door. “Whenever you are, Lance.”

Damn. Why did hearing Keith say his name feel so good? Lance faced the doorway and gripped his chest for a second before opening the door. He was seriously happy they were friends. 

“I’m home, guys!” Lance yelled. He took his shoes off in the entrance and Keith followed suit. “And I brought pizza! And something else!” 

“Pizza!” he heard Pidge yell.

“And something else!” Hunk added. Keith chuckled behind him, and Lance glanced back at him with a grin. 

“Are you roommates with all your band members?” Keith asked as they headed towards the living room. 

“Just Pidge and Hunk,” Lance replied. “Allura lives in the dorms.”

The two of them rounded the corner into the living room where Pidge, Hunk, and Allura were chilling on the couch. They looked over when they heard Lance come in and he felt kinda good to see the look of surprise on their faces. 

“This is the something else,” Lance said. 

“Keith!” Hunk cried, jumping up from the couch. “What are you doing here? Ohmygod I’m totally wearing pajama pants right now.”

Keith chuckled. “I ran into Lance at Guitar Center and he invited me to have pizza with you guys. I hope I’m not intruding?”

“Not at all,” Allura said, though she looked a bit wary. “I wish we’d had some heads up, but it’s not a problem.”

Lance laughed sheepishly. “Hehe. I thought it would be a fun surprise.”

Pidge got up from their seat and rounded the couch, grabbing the box of pizza from Lance with a teasing grin. “Well, it’ll be more fun once we have some food.” 

“I’ll get the plates,” Hunk said, rushing into the kitchen.

Lance took his keys and wallet out of his pockets and set them on the coffee table before sinking into the far right side of the couch. He watched Keith do the same and move to sit on his left, glancing at Allura before he did. 

“So, Keith,” Allura started, “what made you accept Lance’s invitation?”

Keith glanced at Lance with a knowing smirk and Lance’s felt his face heat up. Sitting this close to Keith was making him buzz with energy, and Lance gave Keith a goofy smile in response. Keith gave a quick laugh before turning back to Allura. “We became friends.”

Allura smiled back, but it didn’t reach her eyes. “I see.”

“Got the plates!” Pidge said, sliding on the hardwood floors with their fuzzy socks. They set the plates down quickly and opened the pizza box for everyone to grab their own share. Lance immediately grabbed two pieces and started digging into one of them. He hadn’t realized how hungry he was until now.

“So, how did you and Lance become friends?” Allura asked after a bit.

Hunk coughed. “You guys are friends? Since when?”

Pidge snorted. “Yeah, Lance. I thought you said you hated Keith’s stupid mullet.”

Lance reddened and he looked over at Keith with wide eyes. “Um, er, well, duuuh. Who wears a mullet these days? But I, uh, only said that ‘cuz I was embarrassed.” 

Keith raised an eyebrow at him, an amused expression on his face. “Embarrassed, huh? About what?”

Lance’s face couldn’t  _ possibly _ get any hotter, could it? “U-uh, um, I-I, uh,” he stammered. “It, it was the day you got coffee, and I . . . made an absolute fool out of myself.”

Keith threw his head back and laughed, and the sound of it filled Lance’s chest with a warm feeling. He liked Keith’s laugh a lot.

“Wait, when did Keith show up for coffee?” Allura asked, setting her plate down. 

“Yeah, and what happened?” Pidge added, their eyes wide with interest and a smug smile on their face.

Lance groaned. “Can we not talk about it? I don’t want to relive that moment.”

Keith placed his hand on Lance’s arm, and Lance felt a shiver go across his skin. “Please, like I wouldn’t pass up this chance to embarrass you.”

Lance turned to him with an expression of dismay. “Dude!”

Keith laughed again, causing Pidge and Hunk to laugh, and Lance couldn’t help but join in. They five of them were having fun. Lance enjoyed Keith’s presence, and as the night went on and they continued talking, it felt more and more like Keith was a natural part of the group. Which Lance liked. He wanted Keith to come around more often. He wanted to spend more time with Keith in general. 

“Get outta the way, McClain,” Keith said, bumping Lance with his shoulder. They’d switched to playing Mario Kart after finishing the pizza, and Keith and Lance were neck-in-neck for first place.

Lance scoffed. “Hah! Not as long as you’re playing Bowser, Kogane.”

He bumped Keith back, and soon the two of them were pushing against each other as they fought to reach the finish line first. Then the part of Lance’s mind that wasn’t focused on the game was processing just how much of Keith’s body he could feel against his own, and Lance started losing his concentration. Especially since Keith had a really nice body. 

Lance’s heart started speeding up, and as the two of them rounded the last corner of the race Keith quickly pulled away from Lance, making Lance’s side crash into Keith’s leg. Keith won the race, and he pumped his fists in the air.

“Whoo! I win!” Keith cheered.

Pidge and Hunk applauded for him while teasing Lance at the same time, but Lance wasn’t paying attention because his face was suddenly much too close to Keith’s thighs. Lance pulled back and pushed Keith away from him with his hands as a laugh bubbled up from his chest. 

“Whatever, dude!” Lance said, still giggling. “I’ll win next time!” 

Their gazes locked and a blush heated up Lance’s face again. Could Keith tell? Lance really hoped he couldn’t. He didn’t know it was possible to blush so much around someone he was friends with, but this was the first time Lance had been friends with someone like Keith. He was sure it was just because he was excited.

Keith grinned at Lance. “I’m sure you will.” 

* * *

The end of the night arrived too fast for Lance, and Keith gathered his stuff and said goodbye to everyone. Lance had offered to walk Keith to his car, and the two of them walked to the front door to grab their shoes. Lance opened the door and allowed Keith to exit first.

“Tonight was really fun, Lance,” Keith said once Lance closed the door. 

“Really?” Lance said. “I mean, o-of course it was! You’re hanging out with  _ me _ , after all!”

Keith chuckled. “Yeah, it  _ was _ because of you.”

Uhhhhhhhhhh. Lance didn’t know what to say to that. “Uh, well, I had fun because of you too.” 

“You know I’ve never really had friends like that,” Keith said quietly. 

“What do you mean?”

“Like Pidge and Hunk and Allura. You guys are all friends, and you understand one another.”

“What about your band mates? Don’t you guys hang out?”

Keith shook his head. “I go out with Shiro sometimes, but since he moved in with his boyfriend I haven’t been able to see him as often.” 

Lance stopped. “Boyfriend?” 

Keith looked back at him. “Yeah. Adam Westley? The guy with the glasses?” 

Lance suddenly felt so stupid. “I’m an idiot.”

Keith tilted his head. “Why?”

Lance sighed, suddenly reluctant to tell Keith this. “Before we had the riff off I saw Allura talking to Adam, and I thought Allura was interested in him. I thought I would be jealous.”

Keith was quiet for a moment. “Because of your crush on Allura?”

Lance nodded. “Yeah.”

“But you weren’t jealous?”

Lance shook his head. “No, I . . . I guess I wasn’t. I usually am when it comes to her talking to good-looking guys, but . . . I wasn’t.” Huh. It had only just dawned on Lance that he really hadn’t been jealous seeing Allura and Adam talking together. “I wonder why.”

Keith looked at Lance for a long time, a kind of neutral expression on his face. Then a half smile. “Well, I hope it goes well for you two.” Somehow, hearing Keith say that made Lance feel . . . weird. He wasn’t sure how to describe the feeling. It was an uncomfortable feeling in Lance’s chest. He didn’t like it. 

They continued walking. “Are you . . . seeing anyone?” Lance wondered why that question filled him with so much trepidation. 

Keith glanced at him with a grin. “Not currently. Why, are you interested?”

Lance felt his heart skip a beat and he laughed. “Yeah, right. I’m totally gay for you, dude.”

Keith chuckled along with him, averting his gaze.  “Right. Well, I’m gonna’ head home now.” They’d reached his car. He opened the door and sat down. 

“Do you wanna’ hang out again sometime?” Lance asked, feeling weirdly disappointed to see him go. 

Keith smiled. “Of course. Do you even have to ask?”

Lance’s stomach swirled with butterflies, and his heart started beating overtime in his chest. “Hahah, uh, yeah, I guess not. I’ll text you?”

Keith nodded. “I look forward to it. Bye, Lance.”

“Bye, Keith.”

Keith closed the door and started his car up, pulling away from the curb with one last wave in Lance’s direction. Lance waved back, the butterflies in his stomach still there even after Keith’s car disappeared around the corner. He started walking back to his house, but before he knew it Lance was jumping in the air, feeling like a million bucks.

“Whoo-hoo!!” he yelled. “I’m friends with Keith Kogane!” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ;')))))))))


	6. Chapter 6

The rest of the week leading up to the third round was uneventful and went by faster than Lance expected. He practiced with his band members every day and by the time the third round arrived, he was as confident in their performance as ever. 

Lance had also been texting Keith. Which was weird to Lance, because he could talk to Keith over text easier than he could in person. He would still be excited to text Keith, but it wasn’t as overbearing as it was when Lance saw him face to face. So far they’d been texting almost every day, and Lance had come to really enjoy talking with him. They’d talk about video games or TV shows or music, pretty much anything at all. Lance would also send Keith memes, which Keith seemed to like a lot because he didn’t look at memes very often. Lance liked finding ridiculous pictures to send to him. 

The day of the third round arrived, and Lance and his friends headed over to the venue. This would be the last chance they had to show their stuff, and then they’d know if they would pass on to the next round. After getting to the site and unloading everything, Lance headed to the rehearsal room to see if Keith was there. He couldn’t wait to see him again. Lance opened the door and spotted him immediately. He was talking with Shiro and Adam, and he was wearing that red jacket that Lance thought looked criminally good on him. 

Lance ran over to him. “Hey, Keith!” He stopped in front of him, unsure of how to greet him. For a crazy second Lance had been about to hug him, but Lance didn’t think that would be okay. He didn’t know what kind of boundaries Keith had. 

Keith’s face lit up when he saw Lance. “Lance. Hey.” 

Lance’s heart danced at the sight of Keith’s smile. “Uh, hi.” He suddenly realized he should greet the other two people standing next to him. “Um, hey, Shiro. And Adam.”

“I don’t think we’ve met,” Adam said, extending his hand. “Lance, right? You did the riff off with Keith last time.”

Lance shook Adam’s hand and gave an awkward laugh. “Haha, y-yeah. That was me.” 

“You were really impressive,” Adam said. “Now I know why Keith doesn’t shut up about you.”

Lance glanced at Keith to see him averting his gaze. His ears grew redder as Lance stared at him. Was Keith . . . ? Was Keith  _ blushing _ ? That made Lance weirdly happy. “Really? He doesn’t shut up about me?”

“We never hear the end of it,” Shiro said, smiling broadly. 

“Can we not talk about this right now?” Keith asked, folding his arms in front of his chest. 

Shiro reached over and tousled Keith’s hair. “Whatever you say, Mullet-Head.”

“Hey!”

Shiro and Adam laughed, and Lance found himself smiling so hard his cheeks hurt. Keith talked about him to Shiro and Adam. His stomach flip-flopped, and Lance wondered again why it made him so happy. Lance started giggling too, and Keith’s mouth pulled up in a grin.

“Are you ready for the last round?” Shiro asked.

Lance nodded. “Totally.”

“I look forward to hearing your last song,” Keith said, his eyes on Lance’s.

Lance’s face warmed up. “Me too. I-I mean, about you. I’m looking forward to hearing your song. Not mine. I’ve already heard mine. A bunch of times.”

Keith chuckled. “I bet.” 

The stagehand came in to announce places, and Lance sighed. He’d wanted to spend more time with Keith. 

“Well, looks like we’ve gotta go,” Shiro said, taking Adam’s hand. “Don’t be late, you two.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Keith demanded, his face reddening again. Shiro chuckled in reply as he walked away, and Keith sighed roughly. “I’m gonna’ take off too. Do you want to meet up after the show?” 

Lance nodded. “Yeah. I think they’re releasing the results tomorrow night.”

Keith thought for a moment. “In that case, let’s meet up tomorrow. We can wait for the results together, if that’s okay with you.”

“Yes!” Lance blurted. “It’s more than okay! You should come over! Well, at least if that’s what  _ you _ want. Not that I’d have a problem with what you want to do, but it’s just that, uh, I don’t wanna’ inconvenience you or something, I dunno.”

Keith chuckled at Lance’s attempt to form a coherent sentence. “Sounds good. I’ll text you later, okay?”

Lance nodded furiously as Keith gave him a wave and headed off to join his band members. He’d been trying not to think too much about Shiro’s comment. Now that he’d assured himself he was straight, he was determined not to go down that rabbit hole again. He knew what he felt for Keith was just friendship, and he knew it wouldn’t progress past that. 

He did have to admit to himself that his friendship with Keith was unlike any friendship he’d ever had with another guy. No, scratch that, it was unlike any friendship Lance’d ever had  _ period.  _ If Lance even  _ thought _ about Keith—and he found himself doing that a lot lately—he got these crazy butterflies in his stomach for a split second. It was even more intense when Lance was around Keith in person. Lance felt so, so,  _ so _ happy to be around Keith and talk with him. He’d realized a couple nights ago just how much he cherished his friendship with Keith.

It was surprising to him, and a little scary. Lance had never felt this for someone before. He wondered if Keith was becoming something of a best friend to him. Lance had never really had a best friend. 

“Best friend,” he whispered to himself.

Lance immediately blushed and, unable to keep the swelling of emotion in his chest in, he crouched on the ground and buried his head in his arms. He couldn’t stop smiling, and if someone saw his face right now they’d think he was crazy. 

“Lance?”

Lance glanced up to see Allura looking at him with a confused expression. “Are you alright?”

Lance jumped to his feet. “I’m fine! I’m better than fine, actually. I’m super good right now!”

Allura gave a hesitant laugh. “Ooo-kay. Well, everyone else is in the other rehearsal room so I thought to come and get you.”

Lance nodded. “Alright. I’m coming.”

* * *

Lance and his friends were waiting in the wings as Keith’s band set up. They’d gone with Lance’s “secret plan” all three rounds, and Lance was so glad he’d come up with it. If it meant they got to watch Keith’s band play, Lance would get here three hours early.

Keith and his band set things up pretty quickly, and soon they were just waiting for the MC to announce them. In the dim blue light Lance could sort of make out Keith’s figure, and he watched Keith stretch his arms. 

The curtains pulled back, and Adam started them off with a pretty fast tempo. After a measure the other members came in perfectly in sync, and Lance watched as the stage flooded with color. Keith stepped up to the mic and started singing, and Lance shivered as chills washed over him. He couldn’t stop staring. He didn’t want to stop staring. Keith was . . . radiant. There was no other way to describe him. He filled the stage with his voice, his presence. Everything about him made Lance want to keep watching. Lance couldn’t believe he was friends with someone like that.

Something tightened in Lance’s chest, and a warm feeling spread in his gut. For some reason, Lance wanted nothing more than to walk on stage and hug Keith as close to him as possible. No, he  _ needed _ to be close to Keith. Lance had to get closer to him, but he didn’t know how. It was like he had a huge amount of built-up energy but no idea how to release it, so it just fizzed inside Lance and made him restless. More than that, it made him realize that he really  _ did _ consider Keith to be his closest friend. It hadn’t been more than a week since the two of them had started talking, but Lance already felt a crazy strong connection. Was that normal? Or was Lance just imagining things? 

Keith’s turn was over, and Lance cheered from the wings. The curtains closed and the blue-out took over, prompting Lance to start moving their things on stage. Once they’d gotten set up he looked over to the stage left wings to see if he could spot Keith. Then he shook his head. Lance had to focus on performing right now. He rubbed his pick between his fingers, a tick he did for good luck. He had this. He’d be able to talk to Keith later.

* * *

“Okay, guys, Keith is coming over!” Lance announced to the group. It was the day after the third round, and Keith had confirmed in a text that he’d be heading over to view the results with Lance. Since they hadn’t been able to meet up after the show yesterday, Lance was itching to see him.

“Guys, I’m so nervous,” Hunk said, chewing on his fingernails. “What if we don’t pass? I don’t think I could handle that.”

“Well, I listened to the other bands’ songs,” Pidge said. “They’re all posted on the website.”

“What?!” Lance whipped around. “Even ours?”

“Yes, Lance, even ours,” Pidge replied. Even they looked nervous, which wasn’t usual for them. “Most of them were good. A lot of them were good, actually. There were only a few where it was obvious they didn’t have much experience.”

“Well, that’s good, isn’t it?” Allura said. “They only eliminate a few bands during the first round. That gives us a better chance of making it.”

“Yeah, but there were so many other good bands,” Hunk protested. “And music is mostly subjective, so how do we know the judges liked our stuff?”

“Aren’t there clear cut categories?” Lance said, glancing at his phone to see if Keith had sent him anything.

Pidge nodded. “Yeah. They judge us based on individual skill, overall skill, and songwriting ability. Skill is pretty objective, but it’s up to the judges’ personal tastes to see if they liked our songs or not.”

Allura let out a shaky breath. “Well, all we can do is hope they did like it. After all, we put everything into those songs.”

The doorbell rang and Lance’s heart dropped to the floor. “Keith’s here. Ohmygod.” He ran to the door, slipping on the wood in his socks, and opened it to see Keith wearing a black t-shirt that was a little on the tight side. And it made Lance forget all of what he was about to say. 

“Uhhhhhhhh,” he blanked.

Keith grinned at him. “Hello to you, too.”

“Keith, get in here!” Pidge yelled from inside. “Hunk is having a breakdown!”

Keith raised his eyebrows. “Sounds serious. Can I come in?”

“Uh, y-yeah, of course!” Lance said, scrambling to recover. He opened the door the wider and gestured for Keith to come in as the words “I’m straight” repeated over and over in Lance’s head. 

Hunk was sitting on the floor with his head on Pidge’s shoulder as they gently rubbed his back. “I’ve never been this nervous before, guys. Not even before we went on stage.”

Lance sat down next to Keith on the couch and pulled Pidge’s laptop towards him on the coffee table. He leaned forward to click to the round one results and Keith pressed closer to him to take a look.  _ I’m straight, I’m straight, I’m straight, I’m straight. _

“How are you feeling about the results, Keith?” Allura asked. Lance glanced over at her to see her staring at Keith with an expression that wasn’t hostile, but definitely wasn’t friendly. Which was weird. Lance knew Allura to be really friendly. It was one of the things he liked most about her.

Keith shrugged, his shoulder brushing against Lance’s. “I’m a little nervous. Of course I want to make it through, but if I don’t it’s not the end of the world.”

“Dude, can you pass me some of that energy?” Hunk said, a miserable expression on his face. “I could really use it right now.”

Keith chuckled. “It’ll be fine, Hunk. You guys are all amazing musicians. I’m sure you made it through.”

“I just hope you’re right,” Lance said. He’d been trying to keep it together for his friends’ sakes, but on the inside he was just as nervous as Hunk was. His stomach was twisted into knots, and it wasn’t just because he could feel every slight movement Keith made beside him. He was genuinely scared they wouldn’t make it through. 

He started tapping his foot on the ground, another nervous habit of his. Lance was one of those people who could never really sit still. His nervous ticks got more pronounced the more emotional he got. Lance needed an outlet for his energy. He refreshed the website again and let out a shaky breath.

“Lance,” Keith said. He placed a hand on Lance’s knee, and a flash of tingling spread across Lance’s body. “It’ll be fine. You’ve got this.”

Lance looked at Keith to see that first, his face was entirely too close, and second, Keith was serious. The tingling was still going through Lance in waves, and while he didn’t understand it he knew he didn’t want it to stop. Lance swallowed and let out in a dry voice, “Thanks, Keith.”

Lance refreshed the page again and his heart nearly stopped to see the words ROUND ONE RESULTS pasted across the top. “They’re up.”

The tension in the room was palpable as Lance scrolled down to see the band list. The Legendary Defenders had made it. When Keith saw his band’s name his hand slightly tightened on Lance’s knee, making a fresh wave of tingling go through his body. Lance continued scrolling and he froze.

“We made it.”

Hunk shot to his feet and let out a huge cry. “YEEEEEESSS!!!”

“We made it!” Pidge yelled, jumping up and cheering. “We made it, guys!” 

They ran over to fling themself at Allura in a hug, and she started laughing. “I can’t believe it!”

Lance met Keith’s gaze and couldn’t move. He could see his own relief and joy reflected in Keith’s face, and before Lance could think he wrapped his arms around Keith and squeezed him in a tight embrace. Keith froze for a second before slowly reciprocating, and Lance’s heart hammered in his chest. He could feel Keith’s heartbeat as well, and it was beating just as quickly as Lance’s was. He must have been nervous about the results as well. 

Common sense came back to Lance though, and he quickly pulled away from Keith. Lance was certain his face was red as a beet. “S-sorry!”

Keith looked a little flustered too, with wide eyes and red cheeks. “U-um, it’s fine.”

Then Pidge tackled Lance into the couch, and in a split second Lance’s face was smushed into the cushion. “We made it, we made it, we made it, we made it!!”

“Urf,” Lance muttered. 

“Alright, everyone,” Lance heard Hunk say, “I’m gonna make a huge meal tonight. We have to celebrate!” 

Pidge pushed off of Lance and stood on the couch, still jumping up and down as they cheered. “Whoo!! Big meal!!”

Lance straightened and glanced at Keith, who looked like he was trying really hard not to laugh. Seeing Keith’s expression made a euphoric feeling bubble up in Lance’s chest, and in no time he was laughing. Keith started laughing as well, and soon the two of them were laughing at everything until their stomachs hurt. The hilarity of the situation and the relief that they’d felt from making it through, and in that moment Lance thought he felt the happiest he’d ever been. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i think i got 3(?) hours of sleep last night? very cool. also please comment! i love hearing your thoughts! it fills me with joy!!!


	7. Chapter 7

“I don’t wanna’ go back to school,” Pidge complained. They were laying upside down on the couch, with their feet on the top and their head hanging off the edge of the seat. “It’s just gonna’ be boring like always.”

“Tell me about it,” Lance agreed, in the same position as Pidge. Hunk walked over from the kitchen and handed the two of them popsicles. “Thanks.” The three of them started their second year of community college in less than a week, and Lance wasn’t ready for it at all.

“Think of it this way, guys,” Hunk said, unwrapping his popsicle. “This is our last year at this community college, and then we’ll get to transfer. Or something like that, I don’t really know the details.”

Lance enjoyed the cherry flavor from his popsicle as he thought about what Hunk said. They’d be transferring in a year’s time. Technically they should be applying to universities as soon as possible, but Lance had no idea where he wanted to go, or even what he wanted to study. He just knew he liked music.

He heard the door open and glanced towards it. A few seconds later an upside down version of Allura came into sight, and Lance took his popsicle out of his mouth to sit up. “Hey, Allura.”

Allura sighed as she sat down in the single chair across from them. “I swear I hate school sometimes.”

“We were just talking about that,” Pidge said. “None of us want to go back to school.”

In Allura’s case it was different, though. Lance knew she was studying to be a doctor, which meant a crazy amount of classes and complicated science and math stuff that Lance had no desire to learn about. Allura sighed again. “I completely agree. My counselor is basically incompetent. He could barely tell me about which schools would be good for me to transfer to, didn’t believe me when I said I wanted to be a doctor, and I spent the entire meeting wanting to tell him off.”

“You should have,” Hunk said. “He’d probably get scared and run.”

Allura still looked troubled. “Actually, guys, there’s something I need to tell you.” Pidge sat up straight, and the three of them waited. “Because of the number of courses I’m taking this quarter, I won’t be around for rehearsal as much. It should be fine, but I’ll be doing more practice at home than I thought.”

Pidge and Hunk were silent, and Lance frowned as he processed that. Allura was an essential part of their band, and they had to be on their best game if they were going to beat any of the other bands who’d made it. Especially since they only had a month to write, memorize, and perfect three new songs.

Lance nodded. “Okay. We can still make it work. I’ll send you the PDFs of the scores for the new songs, and I’ll record Pidge, Hunk, and I when we practice. That way you can still follow along.”

Allura nodded. “Okay. Thanks, Lance. I appreciate it.” 

“No problem,” he replied. 

Pidge added a comment about how Allura could practice the most efficiently and Hunk joined in, but Lance was stuck on something. It was weird. For a while now any time Allura would say something nice to him Lance reacted with . . . nothing. He felt good about it, but it felt like it did when Pidge or Hunk complimented him. Like it was no big deal. 

Lance glanced over at Allura and found that while he still thought she was beautiful, she no longer looked different to him. Did he even still want to date her? Lance’s brain immediately reacted with “yes”, but the more he thought about it the more Lance was certain he didn’t feel that way anymore. Lance blinked. When had he stopped liking Allura like that? He hadn’t realized it until now. 

The four of them spent the rest of the afternoon talking and complaining about the various aspects of school, and when it was time for Lance to go to bed he opened his phone to see a message from Keith. He sat down on his bed and pressed it. 

_ Hey, can i call you later? _ He said.

Lance smiled to himself as he typed out a response.  _ You can call me now if you want?? _

A few seconds later Lance’s phone started ringing in his hand, with Keith’s caller ID on the screen. Lance’s heart picked up its pace and he let out a shaky breath before he answered. “Yellow?”

“Yellow?” Keith said, and Lance closed his eyes at the sound of his voice. “Is that a new greeting that I don’t know about?”

“Uh, just-just forget it,” Lance stammered. “What’s up?”

“I was wondering if you wanted to hang out this Friday.”

Lance’s stomach flipped. “Yeah, definitely! What do you wanna’ do?”

“Um, I was hoping you could suggest something, actually,” Keith said. “Don’t tell anyone else this, but I’m kind of bad at planning these kinds of things.”

Lance laughed. “Your secret is safe with me.” He thought for a moment. “Uh, how about . . . laser tag?”

As soon as he said it Lance wanted to hit himself. Why would Keith be interested in laser tag?! It was a game for little kids,  _ of course _ he wouldn’t wanna’ go. Lance winced as he waited for Keith’s response.

“Laser tag? Sure,” Keith replied. “I’ve never gone, though. I might not be very good.” Lance jumped off his bed and pumped his fist into the air. He did that for a few seconds before he heard his name coming from the phone. “Lance? Hello?”

“Yeah, hey!” Lance said, a little breathless. “That’s fine, dude, you’ll be fine.”

Keith chuckled. “Okay, sounds good. What time do you wanna’ go?”

They spent a few minutes setting up what time they’d meet and whose car they’d take, and by the time they hung up Lance was practically over the moon. He’d be hanging out with Keith this Friday! That was only a few days from now. He could wait until then.

“No, I can’t!!!” he cried, grabbing his pillow and rolling back and forth on the bed. Lance couldn’t take how happy and excited and nervous he was, and all of those emotions were battling in Lance’s chest. Finally, he stood up from his bed and went over to his desk, feeling the need to start writing lyrics for a new song.

* * *

Lance spent the days up until Friday writing three new songs for the next round, going to work, and anxiously awaiting his hang-out with Keith. Lance’d never been this nervous to hang out with a friend before, and he kept having to remind himself to calm down. It was just Keith. But it was also  _ Keith. _ Lance could feel his heart hammering at the thought of him.

Friday rolled up and Lance jumped in his car to head to Keith’s apartment. From his GPS he could see he’d be a few minutes early, but it wasn’t a big deal. Lance couldn’t stop smiling as he drove over, and he was humming to himself the entire time. He wondered if Keith would be any good at laser tag. Lance wanted to beat him. They’d decided to do one round together and one round against each other. It was going to be awesome.

Lance pulled into the parking lot to Keith’s apartment complex. It was quite a nice complex, and Lance looked around as he walked over. He entered the building and into the elevator. Lance quickly used the mirror in the elevator to make sure he looked alright, brushing a few strands of hair away from his face. He grinned to himself. Perfect.

He strolled over to Keith’s apartment, having already memorized the number, and pressed the doorbell. Lance let out a deep breath to calm his nerves. He didn’t need to be so nervous. 

The door opened and Lance was ready to greet Keith, but instead he saw someone else. “Shiro?”

Shiro looked surprised. “Lance? What are you doing here?”

Lance blinked. “I, um. I’m supposed to be hanging out with Keith today?”

Shiro frowned, a worried expression on his face. “I’m sorry, Lance, I don’t think Keith’ll be able to go. He’s got a really bad fever.”

Lance’s eyes widened. “What?”

Without waiting for Shiro’s answer Lance pushed past him, not bothering to look around Keith’s apartment. He rounded a corner into a hallway and saw two closed doors. He picked the one on his left, hoping it was the bedroom. Lance opened the door to see Keith looking bad. Really bad. His face had lost its color, and his forehead was covered with a fever patch. His bangs were matted with sweat.

“Keith,” Lance said. 

Keith’s eyes fluttered open and it took a second for him to focus on Lance. “Lance.”

Lance’s chest tightened painfully, and an awful feeling twisted in his gut. He swallowed against a dry throat. “Keith, I—”

“Sorry, Keith,” Shiro said, squeezing past Lance to get into the room. He sat in a chair at Keith’s bedside. “I didn’t mean to let him in. I didn’t know you two had something planned.”

Keith closed his eyes. “No, it’s my fault. I . . . I didn’t tell Lance that I could . . . couldn’t make it.” He opened his eyes and looked at Lance with half-closed eyes. “I’m sorry, Lance.”

Lance’s heart clenched and he shook his head, coming over to stand next to Shiro. “No, don’t be sorry. Don’t be sorry at all. I-I should’ve checked in with you, or something.”

Keith swallowed. “Shiro, can you make me some soup please?”

Shiro glanced at Lance before standing up. “Sure. I’ll be back in a bit.”

Shiro left the room and closed the door behind him, leaving Lance to hesitantly take his seat. His eyes met Keith’s and he didn’t know what to say, or even what to do. What  _ could _ he do in a situation like this?

“Are you going to be okay?” Lance asked. “W-well, what I mean is, do you think you’ll need to go to the hospital?”

“I don’t know,” Keith said quietly. “Shiro is monitoring my temperature, so if it doesn’t go down he’ll take me there.”

Lance felt an intense lurch of jealousy in his stomach. Wait, jealousy? Why would Lance be jealous of Shiro? There was no reason for him to be, and especially in a situation like this. Lance swallowed. “I hope you get better soon. I know that’s what everyone says, but I . . . I don’t know what else to do.” 

Before Keith could respond an idea popped into Lance’s head. “Wait, I do, actually. Do you have an acoustic guitar?” 

Keith nodded slowly. “In the living room.”

Lance leaped from his chair and rushed to the living room, glancing around wildly to find the guitar. He ignored Shiro’s curious gaze, grabbed the acoustic guitar from its stand, and went back to Keith’s room. Lance settled back into the chair and tried to slow his racing heart.

He fumbled for the tuning pegs with shaking hands. Keith was watching what he was doing without saying anything, and Lance swallowed again. He was trying to remember the chords of the song, and he played a few of them to get familiarized. He took a deep breath and started singing.

_ Arrorró mi niño, _

_ Arrorró mi amor _

_ Arrorró pedazo _

_ De mi corazón. _

 

_ Este niño lindo _

_ Que nació de día _

_ Quiere que lo lleven _

_ A la dulcería. _

 

_ Este niño lindo _

_ Que nació de noche _

_ Quiere que lo lleven _

_ A pasear en coche. _

 

_ Duérmete mi niño _

_ Duérmete mi amor _

_ Duérmete pedazo _

_ De mi corazón. _

He finished the lullaby and looked up from the guitar to see Keith with his eyes closed. His breathing was labored, and every breath sounded painful to Lance. Lance felt that horrible feeling in his gut again, kind of like getting the wind knocked out of him. He wanted to yell or hit something or do  _ anything _ to get rid of this awful feeling.

Lance got up from the chair as quietly as he could, but as he moved towards the door he glanced back to see that Keith’s eyes had opened again. “Oh, sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you up.”

“I wasn’t sleeping,” Keith croaked. “What song is that?”

“It’s a Cuban lullaby,” Lance replied. “My, uh, mom used to sing it to me when I was sick. I just thought of doing it, I dunno’.”

“It was beautiful,” Keith said, and Lance’s stomach swirled. “What does it mean?”

Heat filled Lance’s face. “Uhhhhh. It’s about a . . . baby. Who wants to get candy and go for a stroller ride.” Lance didn’t know how much Spanish Keith knew, but there was no way Lance was going to say the words “mi amor” in English.

The corner of Keith’s mouth pulled up in a small smile. “Thank you, Lance.” He was silent for a moment. “Can I tell you something?”

Lance’s pulse quickened, and he nodded as he sat back down. “Yeah, sure.”

Keith swallowed. “Lance, I . . . I know I’ve only known you for a short time, but I-I feel really . . . connected to you. Or with you. Do you know what I mean?”

Quivers went through Lance, and he couldn’t stop his body from shaking. “Y-yeah. I do. I was, um, actually thinking the other day that I, I consider you to be my best friend. Isn’t that insane?”

“Best friend.” A brief expression passed over Keith’s face, gone so fast that Lance couldn’t tell what it was. “I’ve never had a best friend before.”

Lance gave an awkward laugh. “Yeah, haha. Neither have I. Are all best friendships supposed to feel like this?”

Keith’s eyebrows lifted slightly. “Like what?”

Lance was sure he’d never been more nervous than he was then. “Um, well, ya’ know. Like, like . . . Like I wanna’ talk with you and spend time with you. All the time. And when you’re sick, I . . .”

“What?” Keith whispered.

Lance swallowed. “I feel like I’m going crazy.”

Keith closed his eyes and turned so he was facing the ceiling. “No one’s ever said that to me.” Oh, crap. Had Lance screwed up? But when Keith opened his eyes he gave Lance a smile Lance’d never seen before. “I guess having a best friend has its perks.”

And somehow, seeing Keith with that expression on his face, something in Lance unraveled. A flood of emotions washed over him, and he wanted nothing more than to be close to Keith. As close as physically possible. He wanted to hug him and hold hands with him and be next to him. And he wondered if this was really something best friends felt for each other. 

Lance quirked a hesitant smile. “Haha. Yeah. But you owe me a laser tag game when you get better, okay?”

Keith gave a weary chuckle. “Alright, Lover-Boy Lance.”

“Hey, I thought that nickname was done.”

“Nope. I’m bringing it back.”

“If you weren’t sick right now, I’d kick-box you.”

“Go ahead. I’ll bet I can beat you like this anyway.”

“Oh, really?”

They continued talking about nothing and everything until Keith fell asleep, which ended up being about ten minutes later. Lance felt like he should leave. He should leave, right? But Lance couldn’t help but look at Keith’s sleeping face. It was really . . . cute. And Lance couldn’t believe he was thinking that, but it was really the only word to describe him. With a grin, Lance took out his phone and quickly snapped a picture. He’d use it to tease Keith later. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter!! was!! difficult!! to write!!!!! poor keith baby :((  
> also i wanted to make Lance sing a Cuban lullaby and i literally just looked up Cuban lullabies on google, so i have no idea if it's accurate to real life or not. if someone who speaks spanish could tell me that would be fantastic! anyway, enjoy!


	8. Chapter 8

Lance gently closed the door behind him, the acoustic guitar in his hand. He walked as quietly as he could to the living room and set the guitar back in its stand. Lance could feel Shiro’s gaze on him from where he was cooking, and Lance took a deep breath before turning around. 

“You know he really cares about you,” Shiro said. He had a serious expression on his face. “Maybe it’s not my place to tell you that, but I thought you should know.”

_ Keith cares about me. _ Lance closed his eyes at the thought, letting out a shaky breath. “Yeah.” He opened his eyes and faced Shiro. “I . . . He’s my best friend.”

Shiro raised an eyebrow. “Best friend, huh?” He turned his gaze to the soup and stirred it for a few beats without saying anything. Lance swallowed. Was Shiro gonna’ say more? 

Lance cleared his throat and headed for the door. “Well, I’m gonna’ go. Can you keep me posted? Keith has my number.” 

Shiro nodded absently, still looking at the soup. Lance opened the door and was ready to leave when he heard his name. “Lance?”

Lance stepped back into the apartment to look at Shiro. “Yeah?”

Shiro stared at him for a moment. “Keith is like a brother to me. Don’t hurt him, okay?”

Lance blinked. “Okay.”

“I’ll keep you posted.”

Lance closed the door behind him. What had Shiro meant by that? Keith was Lance’s best friend, of course he wouldn’t hurt him. Shiro must have thought that Lance’s feelings weren’t genuine, or something, because Lance had no intention of ever hurting Keith. He sighed and walked to the elevator. It was time to get home.

* * *

The first few days of school, to put it mildly, bored Lance to death. He could barely focus in any of his classes. At least he could text Keith in the ten-minute break he had between them. Keith was feeling better, thank goodness, and Lance found it a nice respite from going over class syllabi all day. That first week of school was also tough because Allura hadn’t been present at any of their rehearsals. They’d opted to do Mondays, Wednesdays, and weekends for a couple hours longer than their old rehearsal schedule. If they were going to learn three songs in a month they had to do it as quickly as they could.

“Lance, I’m having some trouble with this rhythm,” Hunk said. 

Lance walked over to see Hunk’s score. “Yeah, I knew it was weird when I wrote it. But I wasn’t sure what else to write for this section. Pidge, what do you think?”

That weekend the three of them were in Lance’s garage practicing one of the new songs. Lance had tried to write the songs a little differently than how he usually wrote them, and he’d had a suspicion the weird rhythms would be a point of contention. 

Pidge got off their stool and glanced over Hunk’s section. “Hm. Definitely weird. But I agree, it’s probably what’ll sound best. Hold on, lemme’ see if I can tap it out for you, Hunk.” If anyone could do it, Pidge could. They were a fantastic drummer and had a sense for rhythm that the other members of the band didn’t. 

Lance checked his phone for the tenth time since they’d started practice. “Where is Allura? She said she’d be here.”

Pidge shook their head. “I haven’t heard from her all day. Do you think she’s sick?”

Lance paused. “I don’t know. If she was sick I wish she’d tell us about it.”

Just as he said that Lance heard the front door slam, and a few seconds later a harried-looking Allura came into the garage a little out of breath. “Hi, everyone. I’m sorry I’m late.”

“Where were you?” Hunk asked.

Allura sighed roughly. “I had a lab with one of my science classes. All the other lab times conflicted with my other classes, so my only option was to do Saturdays.”

Lance wished Allura had told him about that. At least he would’ve known where she was. He shook his head. Whatever. Allura was here now, and that’s all that mattered. “Okay. Let’s work through the first half of this song, then.” 

Allura nodded and brought out her guitar and sheet music, and the rest of them set up for the beginning of the song. They’d go slowly at first, then speed up when they were ready. Lance set the metronome to a slower tempo. “One, two, three.”

They started on time together, which was a good sign. The instrumental leading up to the first verse wasn’t bad, and Lance made a mental note to up the speed on that section. He started blocking the lyrics, just making sure the rest of the band could sync their playing to what he was singing. Allura’s guitar was lagging behind, and Lance glanced at her to see a frustrated expression on her face. Lance wondered if this was the first time Allura had looked at the score since getting it. But he knew it wasn’t fair to think that. Allura was trying her best.

They stumbled through the first half of the song, with Allura cutting out towards the end. Lance didn’t say anything, and neither did Pidge or Hunk. None of them wanted to call Allura out or make her feel bad, especially when she must have been feeling bad about it already.

“I know, guys,” she sighed. “I know I’m not there yet. But I promise I will be by the time our next performance comes around. I just have to budget my time better.”

“We’re on your side, Allura,” Hunk said. “We want to help you if you’re having trouble.”

Allura gave him a  hesitant smile. “Thanks, Hunk. Anyway, let’s just continue practicing. I’ll get the hang of it eventually.”

The four of them practiced like that until the end of the evening. Allura was a good sight reader, so it’s not like Lance was particularly worried during rehearsal. It was more so if she continued to practice on her own.  _ Just trust her, Lance _ , he told himself.  _ Allura knows what she’s doing. _

Once rehearsal was over and everything was put away, Lance headed upstairs to take a shower and get a headstart on the math homework he had due next week. He was just finishing it at his desk and about ready to go to bed when he got a text from Keith.

_ Hey you wanna hang out? _

Lance chuckled.  _ Right now? Dude it’s late _

_ I know _ , Keith replied.  _ You wanna hang out anyway? _

A big smile spread on Lance’s face.  _ Hell yeah _

Lance grabbed a jacket, rushed downstairs, and put on his shoes as he waited to hear back from Keith. Lance put the address from Keith’s text in his GPS, surprised to see the name of a local park show up. What did Keith want to do at a park this late? Lance smiled to himself as he imagined Keith selling and buying drugs. As if. He got in his car and headed over. When he reached the park Lance walked over to the playground, where he could already see Keith’s figure leaning against the swingset. 

“So, what drugs do you have for me today, Keith?” Lance said loudly as he walked up to Keith.

Keith looked confused. “What? You thought I was gonna’ sell you drugs?”

Lance couldn’t help but laugh at Keith’s expression. “No, no, not at all! I was just thinking about that in the car and I thought it was funny. Imagine:  _ you _ , buying and selling and drugs. Hah! Yeah, right.”

Keith crossed his arms. “Oh, really? And here I thought I could thank you for being there for me when I was sick, and I had this whole heartfelt thing planned out, but noooo. Lance ‘Lover-Boy’ McClain has drugs on his mind instead.”

Chagrin rose to Lance’s face. “Dude. I thought we agreed.”

Keith chuckled. “I know, I know. Just a little teasing, that’s all.”

Then Keith’s words registered with Lance and he took a suspicious step back. “Wait. What heartfelt thing?”

It was Keith’s turn to look embarrassed. “Oh, uh, nothing. I just . . . really appreciated you staying with me last week. It helped.”

If it was possible for Lance to get happier around Keith, he did. “It wasn’t a problem. I wanted to.”

They stared at each other for a beat. Then two. Then three. Neither of them said anything, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. It was nice, actually. Just looking at Keith. Maybe it was Lance’s imagination, or maybe he couldn’t see clearly because it was dark, but Lance could’ve sworn Keith’s gaze softened. And Lance was starting to feel that need to be close to Keith again. Lance wanted to . . . he didn’t even know. He couldn’t put a specific word to it. He just wanted to be physically closer to Keith. 

Then Lance realized how silly that was. So he blurted the first thing that came to mind. “So, uh, did you know this playground is haunted?”

Keith blinked a few times as if waking up from a nap. “Uh, what?”

“Y-yeah,” Lance said. “Apparently if you come here on the night of the new moon, the swings will start moving on their own. Or something like that.” God, Lance couldn’t believe how idiotic he sounded.

But Keith was nodding along. “You know I’ve actually seen a ghost before.”

Wait. Huh? “You can’t be serious,” Lance said.

But Keith looked serious. “I have. I was taking a walk by my old house at night. I was a kid, I think eleven or twelve. And I saw this tall figure in woods nearby.” Keith’s voice dropped, and Lance had to lean in to hear him better. “At first I thought it was a tree or something. ‘Cuz no human could be that tall, right? But I walked closer and I saw it wasn’t.”

Lance swallowed. His skin crawled, and he had to resist the urge to check over his shoulder. “What was it?”

“It was this tall man with white skin,” Keith whispered, “and he was wearing a black suit. But when I got closer I realized something.”

Lance didn’t dare to breathe. Their faces were really close now, and Lance’s gut was a mix of dread and the usual fluttery feelings he got around Keith. “What did you realize?”

“He didn’t have a face.” Keith still looked dead serious. His gaze focused on something over Lance’s shoulder and his eyes widened in fear. “Oh my god.”

Lance whipped around. “WHO’S THERE?!”

“Bah!” Keith grabbed Lance’s shoulders, and Lance shrieked as he crouched into a ball on the ground. But a second later something from Keith’s story clicked in Lance’s head.

“Wait a second,” Lance said. He stood up and faced Keith, who was covering his mouth with his hand and trying to stifle his snickers. “Wait a goshdarn minute!” Lance walked up to Keith and pulled him in by the shirt collar. “That’s Slenderman, you liar!”

Keith burst out laughing, causing Lance to release his hold on Keith’s shirt. “I’m, I’m sorry! I . . . I couldn’t help it!” Keith slumped against the swing pole, his hand clutching his stomach. “You-you, you just looked so serious!”

Keith dissolved into more laughter and Lance, unable to stay mad at him, started laughing too. Keith’s laugh was incredibly contagious, and the harder Keith laughed the harder Lance did too. Soon the two of them were slumped on the tanbark, laughing until they had tears in their eyes. 

“S-stop!” Lance pleaded. “My, my st-stomach!!” 

Keith gripped Lance’s arm as he tried to calm down, inhaling as deeply as he could while struggling not to laugh anymore. Seeing Keith like that sent Lance into another round of hysterics, and Keith moaned. “Laaannce. I’m gonna’ die, dude!”

After a few more rounds of laughing, crying, and groaning, they were finally able to calm down. They laid on their backs, still coming down off of their high, and stared at the stars together. Neither one said anything for a while, and Lance liked the feeling of just . . . being next to Keith. He liked that he didn’t feel pressure to start a conversation or like he had to fill the silence. Lance liked that he could just  _ be _ . 

“I’m worried about Allura,” Lance said after a bit. 

“Why?” Keith responded. 

Lance sighed. “She’s taking a lot of classes this quarter, and it’s cutting into our rehearsal time. I’m worried she won’t be able to keep up with us.”

“Have you talked to her about her schedule?”

Lance nodded. “Yeah. She says she’ll be fine, but . . . I dunno’. I guess I’m just worried for nothing.”

Lance heard the tanbark shift, and he looked over to see Keith propped up on one elbow looking down at him. “That’s not nothing, Lance. You want to win. It’s natural to be worried.”

Their gazes met for the second time that night, and Lance felt his body warm from head to toe. He  _ really _ wanted to be closer to Keith. Which frightened him a little. So Lance broke his gaze. “Sometimes I forget I’m competing against you.”

Keith was silent for a bit. Lance could still feel Keith’s gaze on him. “Is that a bad thing?”

Lance wondered how he should answer that. “Maybe? I mean, we’re competing, right? So eventually one of us will win and one of us won’t. Someone’s bound to get upset.”

Keith went back to lying down. “I think I’d be upset for a little while. It’d be nice to get money and open for a popular band. But at the end of the day, this is a method of getting better. If my music can improve from this, then winning or losing won’t matter to me.”

Lance looked over at Keith. His expression was determined, but not in an intense kind of way. It was more . . . subtle. Like Keith knew he’d get there eventually if he kept trying. “That’s . . . a really good way of looking at things.” 

Keith turned so they were looking at each other again. And this time Lance found his gaze darting around Keith’s face. He glanced at Keith’s eyes, his hair, his lips. Wait. Keith’s lips. Which were very nice, as far as lips go. Lance swallowed and refocused on Keith’s eyes, and then on the scar above Keith’s eyebrow. 

“How’d you get that scar?” Lance asked, mortified to hear how raw his voice was.  _ What the hell, Lance? _

Keith swallowed. He looked almost as nervous as Lance felt. “I ran into a tree branch when I was little.”

Lance smiled. “A tree branch?”

The corner of Keith’s mouth curved in a grin. “Yeah. I was a wild kid.”

“I bet.” Lance suddenly couldn’t bear to be in the same space as Keith and not touch him, which definitely scared Lance more than he wanted to admit. He quickly stood up and brushed off the seat of his pants. “Well, I should probably be heading home. It’s late, and all.”

“Probably,” Keith agreed, standing up as well. “I hope things with Allura work out.” He hesitated like he didn’t want to know the answer to his next question. “How’s your . . . crush going?”

Why did it irritate Lance to hear that question come from Keith? “Um, actually I don’t think I have a crush on her anymore?”

Keith looked surprised. “You don’t?”

Lance put his hands in his pockets and started heading to the parking lot. Keith followed suit. “Yeah, uh, I guess not. I kind of recently realized that I didn’t like her like that anymore. Which is weird, because I’ve basically been crushing on her since I first met her.”

Keith was silent for a moment. “Was it serious?”

“Not at first. But I . . . started to like her more and more.” Lance felt oddly vulnerable about telling Keith about this. Like he shouldn’t be telling Keith. It wasn’t like it was that big of a secret. But Lance felt like . . . like he didn’t want Keith to hear about this. “It’s not like I was in love with her, or anything.”

The two of them reached Lance’s car, but Lance didn’t want to go just yet. He leaned against his door and Keith mirrored him. “What made you stop liking her?”

Lance didn’t know how to answer that. He didn’t fully know himself. He’d just . . . stopped liking her as more than a friend. “I’m not sure. I liked her at the beginning of the band competition, that’s for sure. I’m not sure what changed.”

Keith tilted his gaze away from Lance. “I’m sorry. I know you liked her a lot.”

“Dude, you don’t have anything to be sorry for,” Lance said. “If anything, you—” Lance stopped himself. There’s no way he could say that out loud.

But now Keith was intrigued. He shifted his stance against the car so he was leaning in closer to Lance. “I, what?”

“Uh, erm, ppf, um.” All Keith had to do was get closer and Lance turned into a sputtering mess. “Um, I was going to say . . .”

Keith raised an eyebrow. “Yes?”

_ Fuck. _ “I was going to say, ‘If anything you helped me realize I didn’t think of her that way anymore’,” Lance muttered, pouting and glancing away from Keith. After Keith didn’t respond Lance looked back to see him with an smug grin, and Lance couldn’t stop the blush from covering his face if he tried. “I dunno’, dude! Is it weird to say that?”

Keith laughed and pulled away. “Glad I’m putting my match-making skills to use.”

Lance bumped Keith’s shoulder with his fist. “Whatever. I’m gonna’ go home now. I’ll talk to you later.”

Keith nodded as he stepped away from the car, that same cocky smile on his face. “Alright. See ya’ later, Lover-Boy.”

“For fuck’s sake, Keith!” Lance yelled, more out of embarrassment than actual anger.

Keith let out another laugh and headed in the opposite direction, raising one hand in a wave. Lance let out a rough sigh and got in his car, taking a moment to sit at the wheel. Why  _ had _ his feelings for Allura disappeared? Allura was amazing in so many ways it was hard not to like her. But for Lance he couldn’t conjure up the butterflies or excited nervousness he would feel when he used to think about her. And he knew he had felt those things ‘cuz he used to think about her a lot. The thing he thought about most days now was . . . 

Wait. Lance squinted. The  _ person _ he thought about most days now was  _ Keith. _ Well, that made sense, he was Lance’s best friend after all. It didn’t explain why Lance kept getting nervous and flustered around him. Or why he thought Keith was so good-looking. Or why he felt this pull towards Keith that he couldn’t explain. Lance sighed. He knew he was straight. He knew he’d never have feelings for Keith like that. Surely he could just admire Keith’s looks without being gay, right? And to top it all off, Lance had never had a best friend before. For all he knew these feelings could be completely normal. Lance nodded to himself. These were just feelings of friendship. He was sure of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh, lance. will you ever realize your own feelings?


	9. Chapter 9

The month before the next round started was . . . chaotic. Lance had classes almost every day of the week, and when he wasn’t doing homework he was rehearsing with Hunk and Pidge. It barely gave him time to hang out with Keith, which was a disappointment. Allura was at the first few rehearsals, but as the weeks went by she showed up less and less. Lance tried reaching out to her more than once, and was met with silence or one-word answers. Pidge and Hunk expressed similar worries, especially since when Allura  _ was _ around to practice, she wasn’t as far along in the songs as the rest of them were. Finally, the night before the first round of part two was upon them. And Lance was freaking out.

“We need to work this section again,” Lance said. “We’re not in sync.”

Hunk sighed. “Sorry, Lance. This rhythm is still really hard.”

“Have you tried putting the tempo way down and then speeding up until you’ve got it?” Pidge asked. “That’s what I do when I’m stuck.”

“I tried that, but it’s still frustrating me.” Hunk looked over at Lance. “Can’t I simplify it? Our performance is tomorrow.”

Lance frowned. “I wrote this rhythm because of the way it would make the song sound. You should have asked me at the beginning to simplify it if it was this difficult for you.”

Hunk opened his mouth like he was going to argue, but closed it. “Okay.”

The sound of the front door slamming got their attention, and a moment later Allura was coming through the door. “I’m here.”

“Finally,” Pidge muttered.

If Allura heard them she didn’t show it, and she was quickly ready with her guitar and sheet music. Lance felt his heart sink. “You still need your sheet music?”

Allura glanced at him. “Just to remind myself what I’m doing. I’ll be fine.”

Lance didn’t have the energy to argue. “Fine. Let’s go from the top.”

The beginning of this song started with a phrase from the rhythm guitar by itself. Allura plugged her guitar in, glanced at the sheet music, and started the phrase. It sounded pretty good, and Lance breathed a sigh of relief. After a few measures everyone else joined in, and they were off. Lance played his part as he waited for the first verse to start. He took a breath and started singing.

The four of them were good until about halfway through the song. But after they finished the second chorus it started falling apart. The instrumental between the second chorus and the bridge featured a bit from each member of the band, and Lance struggled to keep in time with everyone else. He played his mini solo and he could hear the other three getting out of sync with him and each other. Pidge tried their best to keep the drums going and Hunk, while he fumbled a bit at first, pulled off his part. Allura’s part came next and she lagged behind when trying to switch between chords. The four of them kept trying to catch up to each other, to the point where it didn’t even sound like they were on the same measure.

Lance clenched his jaw. He played his part a little bit louder so his bandmates could hear him, and within a few measures they were back together. They ended the song, and Lance could see his own frustration and disappointment reflected in his friends’ faces.

“We perform tomorrow, guys,” Lance said. “We need to be on top of this  _ tonight _ .”

“We’re trying, Lance,” Pidge said. They sighed and took off their glasses to rub their eyes. “It’s just frustrating when we can’t all be here to practice together.”

“So it’s my fault now, is it?” Allura snapped. 

Pidge averted their gaze. “I didn’t say that. But it would help if you were around more often.”

“You know I’m doing the best that I can,” Allura said, her voice rising.

“Are you?” Lance cut in, his own temper rising to the surface. “You’re never here to practice with us. It’s no wonder we don’t sound good.”

Allura’s hands curled into fists by her side. “Lance, you know I couldn’t be there for those practices. I have to study for every class I’m taking this quarter so I can transfer at the end of the year. It’s not my fault you guys don’t sound good.”

“Excuse me?” Lance said. “You’re the one holding us back!”

“Guys, maybe let’s . . . not do this right now?” Hunk suggested.

Lance ignored him. “We can practice all we like just the three of us, but when you don’t practice with us we can’t perfect it as a group. You don’t even sound like you know the music you’re playing. You still need your sheet music!”

“Don’t turn this on me, Lance,” Allura growled. “I’ve been doing the best I can.”

“Are you saying  _ this _ is the best you can do?”

“Of course not. But you’re worried about nothing. I told you I’ll be fine for the performance, and I will be.”

“But you’re not!”

“Why can’t you just trust that I know what I’m doing?!”

“Because you’re not showing us that we can trust you!”

“ _ Fine! _ ” Allura yelled. She took off her guitar and started packing up, putting her sheet music into her bag. Her face was crumpled in anger, and she barely gave Lance another look. She put her guitar in its case and stood up to face Pidge and Hunk. “And? Am I letting you two down, too?”

Pidge exchanged a glance with Hunk before speaking. “Well, it  _ is _ difficult to keep time when you’re lagging behind.”

“You haven’t been here for any of the rehearsals,” Hunk said quietly. “We don’t know how to play the song with you yet.”

Allura stiffened. She bent down to pick up her guitar and her bag, and without saying another word she stormed out the door. The resulting room was thick with tension. Lance let out a heavy sigh as he sat down in a nearby chair.

“Well, that went well,” Pidge commented dryly.

“I’m sorry, guys,” Lance said. Now that Allura was gone all the fight was drained out of him. “I just want us to be good.”

“Do you think Allura will show up tomorrow?” Hunk asked.

Lance blinked. He hadn’t even considered that Allura might not show up to their performance tomorrow. If she didn’t, they’d have to withdraw from the competition. His stomach twisted at the thought of that. They’d already made it to this point. Lance didn’t want all their hard work to go to waste.

“We’ll have to see,” he responded finally. “I know you guys might not be up for it, but let’s just keep practicing. We’ll work through the wrinkles one by one.”

Pidge and Hunk nodded reluctantly. Lance stood up, resumed his position, and the three of them started the song over again. They worked through the wrinkles like promised, slowing down where necessary and going over tricky rhythms or sections. By the end of the night Hunk said he felt better about his part, which Lance appreciated. Lance just hoped it would be enough for the day after. He also hoped Allura hadn’t decided to quit.

* * *

Lance, Pidge, and Hunk arrived at the venue at their usual time. Allura hadn’t been at the house, and Hunk had suggested heading to the venue to see if she would be there instead. After getting their instruments situated Lance took a tour of the backstage. It was bigger than the first round’s venue. There were more rehearsal rooms and dressing rooms, and there were a set of lockers by the entrance where people could leave their things. There were even a set of singing booths, fully equipped with foam panels and other soundproofing material. He scoured the whole area, but he couldn’t find Allura anywhere.

“She’s not here, guys,” Lance said, walking up to Pidge and Hunk in one of the rehearsal rooms. 

Hunk fiddled with the bottom of his shirt. “I can’t believe it. What if we get disqualified?”

Pidge put their hand on his shoulder. “We’ll be fine. Allura will show up. Probably. Maybe.”

“Lance.”

Lance turned around to see Keith walking up to him, and the amount of relief and happiness Lance felt at seeing his best friend surprised him. “Keith! What are you doing here? Aren’t you in the other block?” Lance’s band was in Block A, and Keith’s band was in Block B. Lance had been glad that he wouldn't have to face Keith until the finals. That is, if The Paladins made it that far.

“I came to watch you perform.” Keith looked at the three of them. “Is something wrong? You guys don’t look so good.”

“Allura got mad at us yesterday,” Pidge explained. “She walked out on our rehearsal, and we don’t know if she’s gonna’ come today.”

Keith turned his gaze to Lance. “Was it about her classes?”

Lance nodded. “She didn’t have the song ready, and I . . . I don’t know if we’ll be able to perform.”

Keith held Lance’s gaze for a beat. “Are you okay?”

Lance could feel his face warming up. “U-um, yeah. Yeah, I’ll be fine.”

Keith frowned and looked like he wanted to say something, but the stagehand came in and announced places for the top of the show. Lance exchanged a dismayed look with Pidge and Hunk as panic started filling his chest. Allura wasn’t coming. They were going to be disqualified. 

“She’s really not coming,” Pidge said. They looked like they couldn’t believe it.

“Oh my god,” Lance murmured. “Ohmygod, ohmygod. What do we do?”

“Lance,” Keith said. He put his hands on Lance’s shoulders and forced Lance to look him in the eye. “Breathe.”

“Keith, I—,” Lance broke off and swallowed. “I don’t if I can.”

“You can,” Keith insisted. “Close your eyes.” Lance did so. “Now breathe in for four counts, hold it for seven, and release for eight.” Keith counted out the beats and Lance followed the best he could. They repeated that a couple of times and Lance found that while his nervousness wasn’t gone, his heart had calmed down enough so as not to give him a panic attack. 

Lance opened his eyes to see Keith looking at him. “How do you feel?”

Lance focused on Keith’s eyes and for a second felt like he could drown in them. Their grey depths were pulling him in, inviting him to let go of anything and everything that was holding him back. Lance swallowed. “I—”

“Allura!” Hunk said. 

Lance whipped around to see Allura walking into the rehearsal room with her guitar over her shoulder. Hunk and Pidge immediately ran to her, and Lance couldn’t believe she was actually here. He glanced at Keith to see his own surprise reflected there. 

Keith removed his hands from Lance’s shoulders. “Go. I’ll meet you after the show. Break a leg.”

Keith gave him a small smile and headed out of the room, leaving Lance to wonder how he was going to approach Allura now. Lance walked up to her, feeling tentative. Hunk and Pidge were firing questions at her one after the other, and her expression was a mix of frustration and guilt. 

When she saw Lance she swallowed. “Lance, I—” Her voice broke. “I’m sorry.”

Lance wanted to make up with Allura. He wanted to be friends with her again. He hated this tense atmosphere, and how Allura couldn’t seem to meet his gaze. More than anything he wanted her to know he was sorry as well. “Me too. But I think we have more to talk about than just apologies. Are you performing with us?”

Allura nodded. “I took a cab here.”

“Then let’s talk after the show,” Lance suggested.

Allura met his gaze and nodded again. “Alright.”

“We should probably get in places now, though,” Pidge reminded them. “We’re second on the list, so we need to get ready, like, now.”

The rest of them agreed, and they moved to start getting their instruments in place. Once their instruments were set up in the wings Lance gathered his friends in a small circle. “I know we’re not all one-hundred percent confident on this song, but let’s give it our best shot today.”

“Yeah,” they agreed. 

The band before them finished and the curtain closed. The blue-out came on and Lance and his band members hurried to get their instruments on stage. They made it with plenty of time, and before the MC finished talking Lance closed his eyes. He needed to focus. They had to beat this band if they wanted to move on. He had to remind himself why he was here today.

Keith’s face flashed in Lance’s mind, and Lance opened his eyes. That’s right, Keith would be in the audience today. Lance swallowed as he fully realized the fact that Keith had come out to watch him play, even if he wasn’t playing today. Why? Did Keith really want to see Lance play? Lance clenched his jaw and his grip tightened on his pick. If Keith was here to watch Lance, Lance would make sure he got what he came for.

The MC introduced them and the curtain opened. Lance took a deep breath and let it out as he gazed out into the crowd. He couldn’t see individual faces, but just knowing that Keith was there was enough. Lance turned to Allura and she gave him a firm nod. She started playing. 

As soon as she started playing Lance noticed that she’d improved. She was more confident in her strokes, and when everyone else joined in Lance felt himself fill with energy. He played the melody leading up to the first verse and started singing. He sang about not fitting in, about doubting his own abilities and what he could do. He sang about overcoming that doubt and realizing he could do just about anything. And as Lance sang he felt his chest swell with emotion. 

They came up on the bridge and anxiety tightened Lance’s stomach. The four of them played through their mini solos, and while it wasn’t as coherent as Lance would’ve liked it to be, it wasn’t as bad as it had been yesterday. They pulled it off and finished the song strong, the four of them sweating and breathing hard. 

The crowd cheered for them, and Lance’s eyes searched for Keith even though he knew he couldn’t see him. Lance closed his eyes and just listened, and he could’ve sworn he heard Keith’s voice among the crowd. The curtain closed and the four of them brought their instruments off stage. Once they were in the wings they all smiled at each other.

“Great job, guys,” Lance said. “Thanks for sticking through it.”

“Even if we don’t progress, I’m glad to have performed with everyone,” Hunk said, before his face crumpled and he burst into tears.

“Oh, Hunk,” Pidge said, rubbing his back. “It’s alright, man.”

Allura smiled. “We should get our instruments back to the van. We’re done for today, after all.”

They took their instruments back to their van, and Lance’s face lit up at the sight of Keith waiting for them. He jogged ahead of his friends to get to Keith faster.

“Keith!” Lance said, coming to a stop in front of him. 

“Hey, Lance,” Keith said, giving him a smile. “You guys did great. It was so good to watch you perform from the audience, for once. You looked really good up there, Lance.”

Oh, crap. Lance’s heart squeezed and he swallowed.  _ Remember, Lance. Your feelings are not romantic, they’re just friendly. _ Lance tried for a goofy smile. “Really? I bet I looked better than you.”

Keith raised an eyebrow as his cheeks reddened. “So, you’re saying I look good normally?”

“No!” Lance protested. “Well, yeah, but I looked way better than you!”

“Hey, Keith!” Hunk said, coming up behind them. “Thanks for coming to watch us.”

Keith gave Lance a smirk before turning to Hunk. “No problem. I enjoyed it.”

“Do you wanna’ come back to the house with us?” Pidge asked. “They’re releasing the results as the rounds happen this time.”

Keith shook his head. “Thanks, but I have to get going.”

Pidge carried on the conversation, but Lance stopped listening when he caught sight of Allura’s expression. Her gaze was fixed on her shoes, and her hands were clenched in front of her. She looked like she felt out of place, and guilt twisted Lance’s stomach. He needed to fix things with her. 

“I’m gonna head out now,” Keith said. He looked at Lance. “Good job today. I hope you make it through.”

“Yeah. Me too,” Lance replied. He watched Keith head back inside the venue before turning to his friends. “Alright, everyone. Let’s head back. If we beat the other band we’ll need to have our other two songs ready.”

The four of them piled into the van, and the drive back was awkward, to say the least. Allura barely made eye contact with any of them, and Lance felt himself growing increasingly nervous as they got near the house. Lance wasn’t good with honest conversations. His stomach tied itself in knots at the thought of confronting Allura about their argument yesterday. He knew Pidge and Hunk would want to say something too, but Lance had been the one to say the worst things to her. He felt awful about them. But he also didn’t know what to say.

Lance took out his phone and started texting Keith.  _ Hey can I ask you about something _

_ Anything,  _ Keith said.

_ How do i make up with allura?  _

The three dots in the corner of the screen lingered for a while before Keith’s response popped up.  _ Just hear her out. She probably hasn’t told you everything yet. And ask yourself which one you want more: this contest or her friendship. Be honest with yourself and her. It’ll work itself out _

Lance sighed.  _ I’m so nervous _

_ You’ll be fine,  _ Keith said.  _ I’m here for you Lance _

Lance closed his eyes as the weight of Keith’s words washed over him. God, he didn’t know what he’d do without Keith’s friendship. It was surreal how quickly the two of them had bonded, and how close Lance felt to him now. He felt like he could tell Keith anything and everything. And he wanted to, which was kind of intimidating. Being best friends with Keith was like the whole world to Lance, and he’d never felt this strong of a connection to someone before.

They arrived at the house and unpacked their instruments into the garage. The four of them then gathered around the coffee table in the living room, and Lance could feel the tension in the air. Hunk was the first to speak.

“Can we talk about this, guys?” he said. “I really hate arguing and feeling like this, ‘cuz you guys know that I love you and we’re never going to get past this if we don’t talk about it, and I feel like we should because I love being in a band with everyone and I don’t want us to break up and . . . yeah.”

“Thank you, Hunk,” Pidge said dryly. “But I agree. We should address the elephant in the room.”

Allura sighed. “I’m sorry guys. I know I was lagging behind. And it wasn’t just that I had a lot of homework and classes. I . . . I overestimated myself. I thought I’d been fine with school and the contest, but I wasn’t. I basically stayed up all last night so I could be somewhat ready for today’s performance. I’m really sorry everyone.”

“We’re sorry too,” Lance said. He swallowed. “We didn’t _ —I  _ didn’t _ — _ consider the amount of time you’d have to put in for classes. And I’m sorry that I didn’t trust you to pull through.”

“You were right not to trust me, though,” Allura replied. Her chin wobbled and she clenched her hands together in her lap. “I should have told you from the beginning.”

“You did what you thought you had to,” Hunk said. “We get that. We’re just glad you’re here with us now.”

Pidge nodded. “And we hope that you’ll stay with us until the end.”

“Yes, me too.” Allura gave them a shaky smile.

Even though their words had been exchanged and the topic had been addressed, Lance felt like there was still something missing. He thought back to what Keith had said. Lance needed to be open and honest, and he needed to decide which one he wanted more: Allura or the contest. 

His jaw set, Lance turned to Allura. “Actually, Allura, I wanted to speak to you privately. Sorry, Pidge and Hunk.”

Pidge gave Lance a smug look. “Huh. I wonder what that could be about. Good luck, Lance.”

Lance rolled his eyes as Pidge and Hunk got up and left the room. He knew Pidge was referring to his “crush” on Allura, but Lance’s feelings were different now. He turned so he was fully facing Allura and took a deep breath. “I know I said sorry earlier, but I wanted to say it again. I’m really sorry for not believing in you. And for getting upset at you.”

Allura nodded. “Me too. I felt  _ awful _ after I left yesterday. It doesn’t feel right to fight with you.”

Lance knew how she felt. “I don’t like fighting with you either. You’re one of my closest friends, Allura. And . . . I don’t want to ruin that. So if being in this contest is too stressful for you then it’s totally okay for you to say so. We can drop out. We don’t have to continue doing this if it’s too much for you, and I’d rather be friends with you than win a stupid band contest.”

Allura shook her head as tears spilled onto her cheeks. “No, no. It’s not stupid, Lance. I love being in this band, and I wouldn’t change that for anything. I stressed myself out too much this quarter, and put too much on my plate when I didn’t have to. I want to do this contest.”

“Are you sure?” Lance asked. “You don’t have to.”

Allura nodded and tried for a smile. “I’m sure. I’ll work something out.”

Lance smiled back, and Allura leaned forward to wrap her arms around him. Lance hugged her back, closing his eyes as he did. He really loved Allura, even if it was just as a friend. He was grateful to have her in his life, and Lance wouldn’t want it any other way. 

The two pulled away and Allura wiped away her tears with the back of her hand. “By the way, can I ask you something?”

“Sure,” Lance replied.

“Forgive me if I’m wrong, but . . . didn’t you used to have a crush on me?”

Lance’s face reddened and he instantly started coughing. It took him a while to be able to answer. “What?! Who told you that?”

Allura laughed. “Nobody had to tell me, Lance. It was easy enough to see for myself.” She paused. “But that’s not true anymore, is it?”

Lance relaxed and the heat in his face faded. “No. I don’t have feelings for you anymore.”

“I thought so.” Allura looked him in the eye before she gave him a small, sad smile. “You know, if we’re being honest, I . . . didn’t really mind you having a crush on me. I always assumed it was a schoolboy crush so I didn’t mind.”

“You knew since the beginning?”

“Like I said, it was easy enough to tell. But . . . I think it was cruel of me to let you go on for so long thinking I was oblivious. Especially since I got jealous when you started showing affection for someone else,” she said.

Lance blinked. “Jealous? Of who?”

Allura gave him a pointed look. “Really? You’re telling me you don’t know?”

Lance shook his head, fully serious. “I don’t have feelings for anyone else. At least, I don’t think I do. Who are you talking about?”

Allura eyed him for a moment. “Hm. Well, if you yourself don’t know, then I suppose it’s not fair for me to influence you.” 

She got up from the couch and started heading towards the door. Lance turned around in his seat. “Wait, Allura?! You can’t just leave me with that! Who is it?!”

Allura chuckled. “Nope, I’m not telling! I’ll just cheer you on from the sidelines.” She sat down to put her shoes on. “I’ll text you tomorrow to talk about scheduling and rehearsal, okay?”

“Are you serious?” Lance gaped. The door opened. “You’d better text me tomorrow!”

The door closed and Lance sighed as he sank into the couch. When had Lance been showing affection for someone else? Was he really that obvious when it came to his crushes? And more importantly, who the hell had Allura been talking about? For a second Keith’s face flashed in Lance’s mind. He chuckled to himself. Yeah, right. How many times did Lance have to assure himself he was straight? There was absolutely no way he had feelings for Keith Kogane.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> not too much keith stuff in this chapter cuz i wanted to focus a bit more on the actual band contest and music stuff. enjoy! :D


	10. Chapter 10

Lance grabbed his keys and wallet and headed downstairs. He was gonna’ go watch Keith’s performance today since Keith had been at Lance’s yesterday. He reached the bottom of the stairs and stopped when he saw Pidge and Hunk standing before him.

“And where do you think you’re going?” Pidge asked as a broad grin spread across their face.

Lance felt his face heat up, but he was determined not to get flustered. “I’m going to watch Keith. He came to see us yesterday, so I thought I’d do the same.”

“And you didn’t think to ask us?” Hunk asked, propping his hands on his hips. “We’re Keith’s friends, too!”

Lance blinked. “Sorry, dude. Did you wanna’ come?”

“Of course!” Hunk said. “But I’ll forgive you if you buy me some candy later.”

Lance rolled his eyes as he smiled. “Sure, sure. Let’s just head to the venue, okay?”

Lance drove the three of them to the venue, using the visitor’s parking this time. They walked around to the back of the building and headed inside. Lance went to the rehearsal room they’d been in yesterday, but a quick peek told him Keith wasn’t there. They checked a few more rehearsal rooms before finding the one Keith and his bandmates were in, and Lance immediately smiled at the sight of him.

“Keith!” Lance jogged over to him. “Surprise!”

Keith’s eyes were wide. “Lance! Pidge, and Hunk. What are you doing here?”

“We came to watch you guys!” Hunk answered. 

“Duh,” Pidge added. “Adam, I actually wanted to ask you about your drumming technique during your single stroke rolls.”

Adam smiled. “Sure, I’d be glad to, Pidge. What did you have questions about?”

Lance let the two of them chat, and Hunk walked over to Shay to talk with her about something. Lance faced Keith with a grin. “You didn’t think I’d pass up an opportunity like this, did you?”

Keith quirked an eyebrow. “And what opportunity would that be?”

“Uhhh,” Lance blanked. “The opportunity to see how good you are on stage?”

Keith averted his gaze as he gave a shy smile. “Well, alright. I guess that’s a pretty good opportunity.”

Lance grinned wildly at the sight of Keith’s shyness. It was pretty fun to see.

“Oh, by the way,” Keith said, “how did your talk with Allura go last night?”

“Good, I guess,” Lance replied. “But Allura said something to me that was kinda confusing.”

Keith opened his mouth to say something but before he could the stagehand announced places. Keith frowned. “Why do I feel like the stagehand always interrupts during the most important moments?”

Lance laughed. “It’s okay, dude. I’ll see you after the show for sure. But you’d better be super amazing!”

Keith grinned. “What, you mean like always?”

“Okay, Kogane, don’t get too cocky now.”

“Says the pot to the kettle.”

“Whatever! I’m going to the audience now!” Lance turned on his heel with an exaggerated harumph, Keith chuckling behind him. Lance liked making Keith laugh. It made him feel invincible, like he could do anything and everything. He smiled widely to himself and headed out the building and back to the front.

* * *

Of course, Keith was amazing. Lance continued to be impressed by Keith’s guitar technique, and watching from the audience was a different experience than watching from the wings. He could see the entire band from the front, and watching the way the four of them blended together was exhilarating. Lance watched Keith with wide eyes, but as Keith continued singing Lance closed his eyes so he could hear every facet of the song. Keith’s voice washed over him, giving him shivers and making Lance wonder how Keith was able to belt these amazing high notes and play incredible guitar riffs at the same time. Lance opened his eyes to see Keith step away from the mic and go on a breathtaking guitar solo, and another wave of goosebumps coated his body. Lance still couldn’t believe he knew someone as awesome as Keith. He cheered extra loud once their song was done.

As soon as the curtain closed Lance got up from his seat and headed outside. Pidge and Hunk had stayed to watch the other bands, but Lance didn’t care about them. He ran around the building to the backstage door again, catching Keith and his band as they were leaving the stage left wings with their instruments.

“Keith!” Lance called, running up to him. “That was frickin’ awesome, dude! You were seriously amazing!” 

Keith looked at him with a wide smile. Beads of sweat fell down the side of his face and he was a little breathless, but Lance thought he’d never looked better. “Thanks, Lance. Was I as amazing as you were yesterday?”

Lance grinned as the compliment sent his heart singing. “Heh, you managed it somehow.”

Keith lightly bumped Lance with his shoulder. “Show off. Why don’t you help me with these instruments instead of standing there boasting?”

Lance complied, helping Keith and his band to finish moving all their instruments to their van out back. After they finished packing everything up the five of them went back inside to hang out in the rehearsal room. Apparently, Shay had friends in another band that she wanted to watch, and Adam and Shiro accompanied her to the audience. Keith and Lance stayed in the rehearsal room where there were a few other bands hanging out. 

“So, what did Allura say to you that was weird?” Keith asked.

“She asked me if I had a crush on her,” Lance admitted.

Keith blinked. “What did you say?”

“I told her the truth,” Lance replied. “That I used to have a crush her but I didn’t anymore. Apparently she knew I’d had a crush on her the entire time, and that she hadn’t really minded because she’d thought it wasn’t serious.”

“Really?” Keith said. “And she never said anything?”

Lance hesitated. “I think she kinda liked the attention I was giving her. Which I can’t blame her for ‘cuz, you know, who doesn’t like getting attention? But then she told me that she felt bad about letting me like her for so long, and that she got jealous when I started ‘showing affection’ for someone else. Whatever that means.”

Keith frowned. “Showing affection for someone else? Did she say who?”

“No, she didn’t,” Lance said. “Which is weird ‘cuz I’m pretty sure I don’t have a crush on anyone else, so who would I be giving affection to? She must have been seeing things where there aren’t any.”

Keith didn’t say anything for a bit. He had a somewhat blank expression on his face, but Lance thought it looked a little sad. What was Keith thinking about? He turned to Lance with a nod. “Probably. After all, you know yourself better than anyone else does, right?”

Lance blinked. “Right.” Why did Keith saying that fill Lance with such an uncomfortable feeling? Lance felt like he’d said something wrong, but he didn’t know what that something was. He just felt like he’d upset Keith in some way.

“Well, well, well. Look who it is,” a voice sounded behind Keith. Lance peered around him to see another band standing before them with smug expressions. They were all weirdly tall, and the person in front, the only guy in the group, took a step forward. He had long white hair and slightly tanned skin, and everything about him instantly pissed Lance off. “Keith Kogane. I have to applaud your performance from earlier. You’ve really outdone yourself in terms of how outrageously horrid your songs are.”

Keith sighed. “What do you want, Lotor?” Lance glanced at Keith to see a bored and slightly annoyed expression on his face. 

The guy, Lotor, chuckled. “Oh, nothing. I’m simply here to give you a warning. You’re not going to reach the finals, and I’m going to surpass you. Isn’t it nice of me to tell you that?”

Whoever this guy was, Lance hated him immediately. He stepped forward until he was toe-to-toe with Lotor, although Lance was still shorter than him. “Hey, buzz off! If Keith’s songs are so bad, doesn’t that mean your songs are worse? You just said you’re gonna’ surpass him so if anything you’re already pretty bad!”

Lotor looked at Lance with wide eyes before throwing his head back and laughing. Chagrin rose to paint Lance’s face red, and it took a few seconds for Lotor to calm down. “Oh, man! Keith, is this your pet? He’s rather cute, isn’t he?”

Anger burned like a fire in Lance’s gut. “Shut up, I’m not anyone’s pet! I’m Lance McClain, the leader of The Paladins!”

Lotor took a step back and slowly eyed Lance up and down as he brought his hand to his chin in thought. “Lance McClain, leader of The Paladins, huh? Well, Lance McClain, why don’t you ditch Kogane’s disaster of a band and come join me? I assure you I’m better company than some guy who wears a mullet. Not to mention I’m sure you would have more fun with me than him.”

Lance frowned. “Huh?”

But before Lotor could respond Keith moved to stand in front of Lance, his arm slightly held out in front of Lance’s body. Lance looked at Keith’s face to see that the bored expression had been replaced by one that Lance could only describe as murderous. 

“Get the hell out of here, Lotor,” Keith growled. “Neither of us wants anything to do with you.”

Lotor met Keith’s gaze and for a second the two just glared at each other. Lance didn’t understand what was happening. Why had Keith gotten so angry? Yeah, Lotor had insulted his band, but Keith had looked pretty bored before. Why was he so upset now? Lotor’s gaze slid over to Lance, and Lance gave him a glare as well. He didn’t understand why Keith was so riled up, but Lance wouldn’t let anyone insult his best friend. Lotor’s eyes narrowed and he looked back at Keith.

“I see,” Lotor said. “So he really is your pet, then?”

Keith’s face turned bright red, and he grit his teeth together. “Shut. Up.” 

Lotor smirked in contempt. “Fine. I’ll leave you two be. Good luck, Keith. And I’ll see you around, Lance McClain, leader of The Paladins.”

Lotor turned and his bandmates followed. One of them, a girl with long, bright orange hair tied in a high ponytail, looked back and winked at the two of them, leaving Lance to wonder what the hell had just happened.

As soon as Lotor was out of sight Keith let out a heavy sigh. “I hate that guy.”

“Who was that?” Lance asked. “And why is he so hell-bent on beating you? And what did he mean when he said I’d have more fun with him than you?”

Keith sighed again and leaned against the wall as he crossed his arms. “That was Lotor, the leader of a band called Galra Nation.”

Lance vaguely remembered Pidge telling them about Galra Nation back when they’d first looked at the competition. “I think I’ve heard of them.”

“Yeah, well they’re a bunch of arrogant assholes,” Keith muttered, glaring at the door. “We met during a band showcase a few years ago, and for some reason he’s been obsessed with trying to be better than me. I don’t even know why. It’s not like they’re a bad band. They’re just assholes.”

Lance blinked. He’d never heard Keith badmouth someone else before. “Why did he think I’d have more fun with him than you?”

Keith glanced briefly at Lance before averting his gaze. “It was . . . nothing. He just doesn’t like me having friends, or something.”

Lance was pretty sure that’s not what Lotor meant, but Keith looked upset so he decided not to push it. Instead he assumed Lotor’s cocky stance and tried to imitate his pompous accent. “Well, I can assure you that I don’t much care for such poppycock. That man was a load of rubbish, I say, and he can kiss my bum.”

Keith shook his head as his lips curled into a smile. “Whatever. Let’s just forget about him.” 

“Gladly, old sir.”

“And maybe stop with that accent. It’s pretty bad.”

“Codswallop! I do a bloody good impression, innit!”

“Whatever you say, Lover-Boy.”

“Okay I’ll stop.”

* * *

That night the results for the first round were released. Keith made it through, which Lance was happy about. Lance also made it through, with barely more points than the band they’d been up against had received. He knew that it was because they hadn’t practiced as much, but with the new schedule he set up with Allura the four of them would be able to practice much more. They had two weeks before the next round. But something was bothering Lance. The incident with Lotor popped up in his mind every now and then, and Lance still wondered why Keith had gotten so upset when Lotor had proposed that Lance join him. And he wondered what Lotor had actually meant by that.

“Hey, Grant,” Lance said. It was a slow day at work, and the shop was currently empty. He and Grant were washing and drying dishes together, doing anything to pass the time. “Can I ask you about something?”

Grant looked up from his dish. “Sure. What’s up?”

Lance told Grant about what had happened on Sunday and what Lotor had said. “And I keep thinking about what he said. I don’t understand why Keith would’ve gotten so mad. I mean, it was obvious that I’d never be friends with Lotor, so why was Keith so upset?”

Grant stopped drying the dish in his hands and faced Lance with a doubtful expression. “Are you sure you don’t know?”

Lance nodded. “Yeah. Why?”

Grant sighed. “I swear, you are one of the most thick-headed people I’ve ever met.”

“Grant!” Lance protested. “Come on, just tell me!”

Grant looked at Lance with an amused smile. “You really wanna’ know? You might regret it.”

“Grant Middle-Name Last-Name, you tell me this second.”

Grant laughed and set down his dish. “Fine, fine. He was hitting on you, Lance.”

Wait. What? Lance shook his head adamantly. “No way. No way, dude! I’m sure he wasn’t.”

“Look, Lance,” Grant said, “I know what kind of guy this Lotor is. He’s one of those guys who thinks he’s the hottest shit, and he assumes everyone wants to sleep with him. So he shamelessly and aggressively hits on whoever he thinks is attractive. And you, my clueless friend, were one of them.”

Lance gaped. “A-are you sure?”

“Let’s look at the facts.” Grant counted them on his fingers. “He called you cute, he checked you out, and he said you’d have ‘more fun’ with him than with Keith.”

“Isn’t that just a way of being an asshole?”

“Trust me,” Grant said. “From a gay guy’s perspective, he was absolutely hitting on you. I bet Keith recognized that and that’s why he got mad.”

“But Keith isn’t gay,” Lance insisted. 

Grant squinted. “Are you sure?”

“Of course . . .” Lance trailed off. He realized he had never actually asked what Keith’s sexuality was. “Well, not entirely, but isn’t it rude to ask something like that?”

Grant shrugged. “It depends on the person. Will it change your opinion of him if he is?”

“No, not at all.”

“Then why not try asking him? You said he’s your best friend, right? He probably won’t mind.”

Lance went back to washing the dishes. He didn’t know why, but the thought of asking Keith about his sexuality didn’t sit right with him. Lance felt his stomach twist into a bundle of nerves when he thought of asking Keith that, especially since Lance wasn’t entirely sure what Keith’s answer would be. Lance blinked as he realized he didn’t know anything about Keith’s love life aside from the fact he was single. Was that something that best friends talked about? Would Keith answer Lance if he asked him? 

Lance shook his head, his jaw set. “It doesn’t matter. I don’t care about that kind of stuff. If Keith wants to tell me about his sexuality, whether he’s gay or not, that’s up to him to decide.”

Grant was silent for a bit. “You’re a good friend, Lance.”

“Shut up.”

Grant laughed. “Alright, alright. Whatever you say.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay guys!! stuffs happening a bit more, and lotor has been introduced >:)) enjoy!


	11. Chapter 11

Lance really hated Grant sometimes. It wasn’t enough for him to get in Lance’s head about Lance being gay, but now Lance couldn’t stop wondering about Keith’s sexuality. Lance was pretty sure Keith was straight, but then again Lance was historically awful when it came to reading other people. Lance sighed and shook his head. He shouldn’t be thinking about whether Keith was gay or not. And besides, it didn’t matter if he was! Did it? That was another thing that confused Lance. The thought of Keith being gay was kind of a relief to him? Or something like that, he wasn’t sure how he felt. How come Lance could be around gay guys like Grant or Shiro and not think twice about it, but when it came to Keith it was an entirely different story? And Keith probably wasn’t even gay! Lance didn’t understand it. 

The next few weeks went by in a blur. Lance’s daily life consisted of school, work, and song practice put on repeat. The last two rounds of the battle royale went by just as quickly, and The Paladins beat their opponents easily each time. The new rehearsal schedule with Allura worked much better, and the four of them were back to being on top of their game. Lance also watched each of Keith’s performances, and he continued to be impressed by Keith’s talent. He avoided Lotor like the plague whenever he went to watch Keith, which was fine because neither Keith nor Lance liked him. Lance was a little annoyed when the results for part two revealed that Lotor’s band, Galra Nation, would be one of the six finalists, but Lance was determined to ignore him. All that mattered to him was that he had made it to the finals and that Keith’s band had too. 

Lance was doing homework in his room one afternoon when he heard a knock on the door. “Come in!”

The door opened and Pidge walked in, taking a seat on Lance’s bed. “Hey, Lance, I wanted to talk to you about an idea I had.”

Lance turned in his chair to face them. “Sure. Go ahead.”

“So you know that we have a three-day weekend coming up, right?” they said.

Lance nodded. “Yeah.”

“What if we did a band retreat?” they suggested. “My family owns a lodge in the hills, and we could use this three-day weekend to write our songs for the finals. We have a month and a half before the last round, and we could spend the whole weekend writing and getting a head start on practicing. What do you say?”

“That sounds awesome!” Lance exclaimed, leaning forward in his chair. “We could make a huge dinner and play games and write music and have a ton of fun!”

Pidge smiled broadly. “Right?! Okay, I’ll go tell Hunk!” 

They got up and headed out of Lance’s room, leaving him to think about the trip. A three-day weekend with his friends doing nothing but having fun and playing music? It sounded like a dream come true! He sent a quick text to Allura to let her know. But he wouldn’t have all of his friends there, he realized. Keith wouldn’t be there. An image of spending a three-day weekend with Keith made Lance’s heart stutter in excitement, and Lance wondered if Keith would want to come with them. 

He headed over to Hunk’s room where Lance could hear him and Pidge talking. Lance knocked on the door before going inside, and the two of them looked over at him.

“Hey, Pidge,” Lance started, “do you think I could invite Keith to come with us?”

Pidge blinked in surprise. “Keith? Yeah, that would be fun! But do the other band members wanna’ come too?” 

Lance hadn’t thought of that. “I dunno’. I’ll have to ask him.” 

“Why don’t you go over now?” Hunk said.

“Good idea.” Lance took out his phone and texted Keith asking if he could come over. “I haven’t seen Keith in a while anyway.”

“Didn’t you just see him last Sunday?” Pidge asked. 

Lance felt his face heat up. “Oh, um, well, yeah. But that doesn’t mean I don’t wanna’ see him again, or anything.”

Pidge exchanged a glance with Hunk before giving Lance a knowing smile. “Alright, dude. We’ll see you in a bit.”

“Ugh,” Lance huffed. He closed Hunk’s door and headed back to his room where his phone vibrated with a text from Keith confirming Lance could come over. Lance smiled as his face heated up again, and he hummed to himself as he grabbed his keys.

* * *

“Hey, Lance,” Keith said, opening the door to his apartment.

A wide smile spread on Lance’s face. “Hey.” He followed Keith inside, and Lance realized he hadn’t been to Keith’s place since Keith had been sick. Lance looked around properly this time, and he noticed that Keith didn’t have much in the way of stuff and knick-knacks. His place was really clean, with a few plants here and there. Lance blinked as he noticed a poster hanging on the wall with Marmora Blade featured on it.

“Where did you get that poster?” Lance asked.

“I saw Marmora Blade in concert earlier this year,” Keith replied. “They were phenomenal. They’re one of my biggest inspirations.”

Lance glanced at Keith to see him gazing at the poster with a soft expression, and Lance grinned. “You really like them, huh?”

Keith looked over and his cheeks reddened. “You’d better not be making fun of me, McClain.”

Lance laughed. “No, no, I’m not! I like them a lot too. It’s cool to see you gush about something for once.”

Keith’s face grew redder and he pouted. “I-I gush about stuff all the time.”

“Oh, really?” Lance teased. “Like what?”

Keith averted his gaze. “Okay, so maybe I don’t.”

Lance laughed and patted Keith’s head. “It’s alright, dude. You wanna’ play video games or something?”

“Fine.” The two of them sat down on Keith’s couch and loaded up Smash. They started a battle, and Lance quickly found that the two of them were evenly matched. Lance went with Falco, while Keith had gone with Link. 

“Why’d you have to pick Link, dude?” Lance demanded, barely evading one of his attacks.

“‘Cuz he’s got a sword,” Keith answered. “Now get back here so I can kill you.”

“I’ll kill you first!” Lance yelled. “Don’t take that out of context!” He rolled away from one of Link’s attacks, rolled back, and went in for the smash, but before he could Link up-smashed him into oblivion. “NOOOOO!!!”

The match ended and Link’s winner screen came up. “Yes!” Keith cheered. “Take that, McClain!” 

“Ugh, I hate you,” Lance sighed, slumping down in his seat. “And you realize that Link isn’t the only character with a sword, right?”

“Yeah, but Link’s sword is the coolest,” Keith insisted. “The hilt is especially way cooler. The only one who comes close to being that cool is Roy, but I don’t like the way he handles.”

Lance squinted at Keith. “How come you know so much about swords? I don’t even know what a hilt is.”

Keith blinked and he turned so he wasn’t looking at Lance. “Um, no reason.”

Lance sat up straight. “Okay, now you  _ have _ to tell me, Kogane. You can’t just clam up after that.”

Keith sighed. “Fine. But you can’t make fun of me.”

“Why would I make fun of you?”

“Because you’re you.”

“I take offense to that.”

“What? It’s the truth.”

“Stop stalling and tell me, Keith.”

Keith was silent for a bit. “I have a knife collection, okay?”

“What?!” Lance shot to his feet. “You have a knife collection and you never told me?!”

Keith looked startled. “Uh, should I have?”

“Of course!” Lance said. “Knives are hella cool! If you don’t show me right now we’re not friends anymore.”

Keith chuckled with a lopsided grin. “Okay, okay. Follow me.”

He took Lance to his room, where he brought a large metal briefcase down from a shelf in his closet. Keith snapped it open and Lance’s mouth opened in awe of all the cool knives Keith had. They were all different shapes and designs, and some of them had intricate patterns and designs etched into the handles. One of them looked like one of those oil spills on the blacktop, or like a soap bubble. When Lance looked at it from different angles the color swirled and changed, and Lance couldn’t stop staring. 

“Can I touch them?” Lance asked.

Keith nodded. “Sure, just be careful not to cut yourself.”

Lance rolled his eyes. “I’m not a little kid, Keith.”

“Could’ve fooled me.”

Lance gave Keith a fake glare, causing him to grin. Lance grinned back and looked at the knives, picking up the color-changing one and turning it in his hands. “What is this one? It’s so cool.”

“It’s iridescent,” Keith answered. “Shiro got me that for my birthday last year.”

“When’s your birthday?” Lance asked.

“October 23rd.”

“That’s soon!” Lance said. “Okay, I’ll have to get you something super cool.”

Keith chuckled. “You don’t have to get me anything.”

“Of course I do! You’re my best friend, dummy,” Lance insisted. “Would another knife be okay? Or maybe something music related?”

Keith shook his head. “Honestly, it’ll probably be good whatever it is. I appreciate you getting me a gift at all.”

Lance smiled. “Okay. Oh, by the way, I needed to ask you something.”

“Sure.”

“Pidge, Hunk, Allura, and I are going on a band retreat this weekend,” Lance said. “Pidge’s family has a lodge in the hills so we’re gonna’ spend the long weekend there and write songs for the finals. I was wondering if you and your band wanted to come with us.”

Keith thought for a second. “I’d have to ask the rest of the band, but I think they’d be down to come. I’ll send them a text right now.” He brought out his phone and tapped a message to them. 

“Okay. In the meantime, let’s do another match of Smash. I have to beat you before I leave today.”

Keith grinned. “You’re on.” He put away his knives and followed Lance back to the living room, where they proceeded to play Smash and yell curses at each other until it was time for Lance to go home. And dammit if Lance didn’t have an amazing time.

* * *

Lance spent the rest of the week packing and getting ready for the weekend band retreat. Keith had texted him the day after they’d hung out that he and his band members would love to come along, and Lance had excitedly told his friends the news. After school ended on Friday, Lance helped pack the instruments, snacks, and other items into their van so they could get on their way.

“When is Keith getting here?” Allura asked, lifting an amp into the van.

Lance checked his watch. “He should be here soon.” They were gonna’ meet at Lance’s house first so that they could drive behind them up to the lodge.

“This weekend is gonna’ be so awesome,” Hunk said. He set his bass down in the van. “Isn’t it crazy that we’re friends with The Legendary Defenders? It’s not every day you get to say that.”

“Although we have to keep in mind that they’re our competition,” Pidge noted. “I don’t want to have hard feelings if one of us gets first place.”

“Me neither,” Lance agreed. He especially didn’t want things to get sour between him and Keith. He didn’t think it would come to that, though. Like Keith said at the park, this contest was just a method of improvement. Lance wouldn’t let something as trivial as a competition ruin their friendship.

Another van pulled up to the curb outside Lance’s driveway, and Lance’s heart did a tap dance as Keith stepped out. He was wearing a ponytail again, and when he turned around to reach into the van Lance caught sight of the back of his neck. Which sent Lance’s stomach into a frenzy of nerves and fuzzy feelings. Lance swallowed. Why did Keith’s neck look so ridiculously good?

“Keith’s here!” Pidge said, waving to them. Keith walked to the other side of the van for something and Shiro got out, caught their eye, and waved back. Lance stepped away from the van to greet them.

“Hey, thanks for coming,” Lance said, extending his hand. 

Shiro took it with a smile. “No problem. Keith really wanted us to come along, so we didn’t really have a choice.”

“I gave you a choice,” Keith retorted from the other side. “You said you wanted to go too.”

Shiro chuckled. “Of course. I think it would be a great chance to learn from each other.” 

Lance knew what he meant. The Legendary Defenders only had one guitarist, with Shay on keyboard instead. The Paladins didn’t use a keyboard in their songs, and each band’s songs had different feels to them. Lance wanted to know how he could apply some of those techniques to his own band, and to his own playing as well. He especially wanted to ask Keith about how he learned to play those awesome riffs he always did.

Adam came around from the other side, coming to stand next to Shiro and wrapping his arm around his shoulder. “Thanks for inviting us, Lance. It’s gonna’ be a lot of fun.”

Lance nodded. “Yeah, I think so too. Is everyone ready to go?”

“Yep.” Adam took out his phone. “Let me get the address from Pidge.”

Within a few minutes the eight of them were on the road, and Lance texted back and forth with Keith the majority of the drive. They played games of pool, Trivia Crack, and air hockey, and Lance won about half the time. The trip only lasted a few hours, but by the time they arrived Lance could barely sit still. Hunk pulled them into the dirt driveway (or dirtway, as Lance liked to call it), and Adam pulled up next to them. The lodge was pretty impressive, with three stories and a cool mixture of wood and stone. Once the car had stopped Lance jumped out of his seat.

“Finally!” he yelled, standing in front of the lodge and stretching his arms high into the air. “I feel like I was cooped up in there forever.”

“You’re just saying that ‘cuz your giraffe legs can’t fit in the van,” Pidge teased, stepping down from the passenger side. 

Lance sighed dramatically. “Oh, poor Pidgeon. Cursed to be short forever.”

“Pigeon?” They scowled. “That’s, like, the worst nickname you’ve ever come up with.”

“Almost as bad as ‘Mullet-Head’.” Lance turned to see Keith walking towards them with his guitar over his shoulder. “You might be stuck with ‘Pidgeon’ for a while, Pidge.”

“Can we stop stalling and head inside?” Allura asked. “I don’t know about you lot, but I’m a bit peckish.”

Shiro opened the back of their van. “I agree with Allura. We should move everything inside and then get something to eat.”

Moving the instruments inside with everyone’s help went by a lot faster than Lance had expected, and within ten minutes they were all situated. Lance took in the interior of Pidge’s lodge with wide eyes. The entrance had a little space to remove shoes, with a step up into the rest of the house. Lance walked into the living room and gaped at the sight of a large rectangle in the center of the space that was slightly lower than everything else. 

“Pidge, your lodge is amazing!” Shay said, twirling around as she looked up at the wooden beams. “Thank you so much for inviting us!”

Pidge rubbed the back of their neck as they smiled. “Oh, it’s nothing. And it was Lance’s idea to invite you.”

Shay said something in response, but Lance was too busy looking at the rest of the house. He set his guitar down on the upper level of the living room and headed into the hallway on his left. There were two rooms on his left, probably offices, and a set of stairs leading to the next floor at the end of the hall. Lance quickly walked to the stairs and took them two at a time, eager to see the upstairs. Directly across from the top of the stairs was a smaller room, most likely a bathroom, and to his right was a hallway with two bigger rooms on either side. A quick peek into each of them told him they were all bedrooms.

“Pidge’s lodge is something else, huh?” Lance turned to see Keith leaning against the stair rail. 

Lance gave him a big grin. “Definitely! I feel like I could get lost here if I’m not careful.”

Keith grinned back. “Yeah. Thanks for inviting us, Lance. Seriously.” He paused. “Why  _ did _ you invite us?”

Lance thought for a moment. “When Pidge suggested a weekend retreat, I thought it would be a lot of fun. But then I realized it would be even more fun if you came along too. So I invited you.”

“Well, I can’t promise a whole lot of fun,” Keith said, “but I’ll do my best.”

“What’re you talking about, dude? I always have fun with you.”

A small smile tilted Keith’s lips. “Me too.”

Pidge’s voice sounded downstairs, and Lance and Keith headed back downstairs together. They joined up with the others in the kitchen, which was just as spacious as the living room. Hunk, Adam, and Shay were talking about their dinner in detail by the counter, and Allura, Pidge, and Shiro sat at the island in the center of the room. 

“Hey, you two,” Shiro said as he spotted Lance and Keith. “We were just talking about the schedule for the next few days.”

“Sure.” Lance took a seat across from Pidge and Keith sat down next to him. “What’ve you got so far?”

“I think today should be about getting the nerves out of our systems,” Shiro said. “We’re all excited to be here, and it’ll be hard to focus if we’re too pumped up.”

“Then tomorrow and Sunday can be used for actually writing the songs,” Allura continued. “Pidge said the garage has been turned into more of a rehearsal studio, so we can split it in two and use it to practice.”

“That sounds good,” Lance said. “What about Monday?”

“We didn’t get that far,” Pidge replied. “There’s not much else to do besides writing and practicing the songs, right? We’ll be driving back home as well.”

“What about going over techniques?” Keith suggested.

Lance turned to him. “Like, a boot camp?”

Keith nodded. “Yeah. Shiro, you said you thought it would be good to learn from each other, right? We could exchange techniques and exercises. Both bands would benefit from it.”

Shiro smiled. “I agree. What do you think, Lance?”

“I think it’s great!” Lance said. “I’ve been meaning to ask you guys about your techniques anyway.”

“Then that’s settled,” Allura said, clapping her hands together. “We’ve got our whole weekend planned out.”

“But right now is for eating,” Hunk said, coming up to them with Shay and Adam behind him. “We’ve got a great idea for food tonight, so get ready to be amazed!”

They all pitched in to make dinner for that night. Most of them were used to making food for themselves, and the only ones who didn’t really know what they were doing were Pidge and Keith. Lance found it funny that while Keith could handle a cutting knife with skill and ease, he was clueless when it came to actually cooking something. 

“Do you know how to make  _ anything? _ ” Lance teased.

“Yes,” Keith answered, folding his arms across his chest. “Pasta.”

Lance gaped. “How do you survive?”

“He eats takeout,” Shiro said. “I end up making most of his meals since he’s incapable of doing it himself.”

“I’m not incapable!” Keith retorted. “It’s just, you know, I don’t how any of this stuff works! How do you know when to put in herbs or spices? How long do you leave food to cook? Why do people insist on salting boiling water? It doesn’t make sense to me!”

Lance put a hand on Keith’s shoulder and tried not to laugh. “It’s alright, Keith. Some things you just can’t win.”

Keith’s face burned in embarrassment. “Shut up, Lance!”

Once dinner was ready the eight of them took it to the living room, sitting down in the lowered area and talking and telling stories as they ate. Everyone was interacting well with one another, and when Pidge started doing impressions of celebrities they all lost it. Lance found himself glancing at Keith more than once during dinner, and the sight of Keith laughing and smiling had something squeeze Lance’s heart. He didn’t know what to call the emotion, but it was warm and exhilarating and took Lance’s breath away. He loved seeing Keith’s happiness. 

After dinner they moved on to party games. Pidge’s game cabinet had a ton of them: Monopoly, Twister, Clue. Pretty much everything. They even had Cards Against Humanity, which was one of Lance’s favorite games. They played through almost every game, finishing with a couple rounds of Mafia, where Lance’s role was the game’s namesake. He’d gotten to kill Keith, and seeing Keith’s reaction to who killed him had Lance sputtering with stifled laughter. Lance knew he’d pay for it later, but he didn’t care. Finally the night came to an end, and everyone was getting sleepy.

Lance yawned and leaned back against the couch. “I dunno’ about you guys, but I’m ready to hit the hay.”

“Me too,” Shay agreed. “I can barely keep my eyes open.”

“Let’s all head to bed, then,” Shiro suggested. “Pidge, what should our sleeping arrangement be?”

Pidge answered after a yawn of their own. “There’s four bedrooms, each with one double bed. So we’ll have to pair up.”

“Fine with me,” Adam said. 

“Of course it’s fine with you,” Keith retorted. “You already know who you’re going to pair up with.”

Adam shot Shiro a grin. “Do I, now?”

Shiro grinned back. “We’ll see.”

“Pidge and I will pair up,” Hunk said. “Right?” Pidge nodded in agreement, their eyes already closing.

“Then, perhaps myself and Shay?” Allura asked, looking over at her.

“Sure,” Shay agreed.

But then something occurred to Lance. “Wait a second. That just leaves me and Keith!”

“Is that a problem?” Keith asked.

“Well, uhh.” Keith was looking at him with a neutral, almost blank expression. Lance’s stomach did a slow roll. “Uh, n-no. Of course not.”

“Good,” he said, standing up. “Let’s all head to bed then. We have a long day tomorrow.”

Everyone headed upstairs, their luggage in tow. They split up into their sleeping partners, but Lance lagged behind the group a bit, giving the excuse of turning off the lights. As he went around the rooms flipping the switches, Lance was trying desperately not to think about sharing a bed with Keith. Without even thinking of anything specific Lance’s stomach dipped, and his heartbeat started acting crazy. He could feel his face heating up at the thought of it, and Lance shook his head. He was trying  _ not _ to think about it, dammit! 

Finally Lance went upstairs. Only one of the doors was ajar, which was probably meant for Lance. He pushed the door open and started to say something but immediately stopped. Because. Oh. My. God. Keith was in the middle of pulling his shirt over his head, and Lance had caught sight of his back. Which made Lance’s mouth go dry and his heart travel to the bottom of his gut.

Keith turned slightly, the shirt now in his hands. He jumped a little when he saw Lance. “Oh, it’s just you. You scared me, Lance.”

“Herm, um, er,” Lance stammered. “S-sorry, dude! Eh, heheh. Uhhhh, I sh-should have knocked or something, god that was stupid of me.”

Keith quirked an eyebrow. “Are you okay?”

Lance forced a nervous laugh. “Y-yeah, dude, totally fine! I’m just . . . uh, ready to sleep, that’s all.”

Keith looked somehow more confused. “Um, okay. Well, I’m just getting ready.”

“R-right!”

Lance took his suitcase in, going to the opposite corner of the bedroom and facing the wall as he got changed. He needed to calm down. His pulse was through the roof, and he didn’t even know why! Why had the sight of Keith’s back rattled him so much? Why was Lance’s stomach repeatedly folding in on itself? And, most importantly, why did Lance  _ really _ want to see that again? He changed as quickly as he could and turned around, inwardly sighing with relief that Keith had put a shirt on. 

“So, um, which side do you want?” Keith asked, glancing at Lance with an apprehensive expression.

“Uhhh, I don’t really care?” Lance said. “It’s up to you, dude.”

Keith eyed the bed. “Okay. I guess I’ll take the right then.”

“Okay.”

“Alright.”

“Yep.”

Oh,  _ man _ this was awkward. If it was anyone else Lance would have been fine. He’d shared a bed with Hunk and with Pidge before, and each time it had been like nothing. Sometimes it was annoying ‘cuz Pidge liked to hog the covers, but it had never been awkward like this. 

Keith climbed in the bed and Lance’s face immediately heated up. He couldn’t get the image of Keith’s back out of his head, and every time he looked at Keith he saw it again. It made his stomach twist and turn, and not because Lance was disgusted by it. It was probably because Lance thought Keith’s back looked  _ waaaaayyyyyyyy  _ too good. Not to mention whenever the image of Keith’s back showed up Lance somehow ended up imagining himself running his hands up and down it. Which was certainly not something that friends did. 

Lance got in bed as well, curling on his left side so his back was to Keith’s. He adjusted his position in the bed and accidentally bumped into Keith. He instantly pulled back. “Sorry.”

“N-no, you’re fine,” Keith said. “I’m gonna, um, sleep now.”

Lance swallowed. “Yep! Me too. Goodnight, dude.”

“Night, Lance.”

At the sound of Keith saying his name Lance felt his stomach jerk again. God, what was wrong with him? Why couldn’t he share a bed with his friend without making it weird? Lance closed his eyes and tried to relax so he could get some sleep. It came to him very choppy and disconnected, and Lance felt like he was awake more than he was asleep. At some point he woke up from a hazy dream to feel something warm around his waist. And something warm pressed against his back. What was happening? 

But then Lance remembered who was in the bed with him, and he froze. He slowly looked over his shoulder to see a sleeping Keith with his arm wrapped Lance’s waist, and his face entirely too close to Lance’s.

All rational thoughts left Lance’s brain, replaced by  _ AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!  _ What the fuck?? Keith was spooning him? Lance was being spooned by  _ Keith?? _ And for some reason, Lance was getting way too worked up about it. He felt like his heart was about to explode out of his chest. He swallowed against a dry throat and tried to shift his body so that he could scoot out from under Keith’s arm. 

But as he rolled over onto his right side, Keith stirred in his sleep. He muttered something and moved closer to Lance, his arm tightening around Lance’s waist. Lance’s face was on fire, and his heart was somewhere near his feet by now. He could feel every nerve in his skin light up, and it didn’t help that Keith’s face was even closer to Lance’s. 

_ Okay, Lance. Let’s calm down. _ Lance closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and desperately begged his heart to slow down. He was pretty sure it wasn’t healthy to have his heart beating so fast all the time. Lance opened his eyes and took in Keith’s sleeping face, and even though his heart was starting to calm down his stomach still swirled and dipped in every direction. But as Lance continued to look at Keith’s face, he was struck by how peaceful it was. With his features relaxed and his mouth slightly open, Lance found that he didn’t want to look away. Keith was good-looking even when he slept. 

“Keith,” Lance whispered. Then he blushed. Why had he just said Keith’s name out loud? What had been the purpose of that? 

Keith stirred in his sleep again, but this time when he muttered it came out as, “Lance”.

Lance froze as a burning sensation roared in his gut. It was a sensation that warmed him from head to toe, one that screamed at him that he had to get closer to Keith or he would spontaneously combust. He closed his eyes and let out an unsteady breath. What was happening to him? He had to do something about this feeling.

But then Keith shifted again, this time pressing his forehead to Lance’s. The burning sensation intensified to an almost painful degree, and Lance’s pulse hammered in his throat. He exhaled on another shaky breath and squeezed his eyes shut tighter as Keith’s nose brushed against his.  _ Holy fuck.  _ He was  _ so close  _ to Keith. Lance didn’t know what was happening to him. 

Suddenly unable to handle it anymore, Lance opened his eyes and pushed himself away from Keith, getting out of bed and heading to the bathroom. He splashed cold water on his face and looked at himself in the mirror. Bloodshot eyes stared back at him, and his face was drained of color. Lance rested his head against his arms on the bathroom counter. Why did he feel such an intense need to be close to his best friend? Lance couldn’t understand it. He wanted to be around Keith so badly it hurt. But there was no way it could be a crush because Lance wasn’t gay. He was attracted to girls. He  _ knew  _ he was. So why did his skin feel like it was scorching hot whenever he was around Keith? 

Lance sighed. Whatever was going on, it needed to stop. He couldn’t be feeling things like this around his best friend. If Keith knew that he’d spooned Lance, he’d probably be mortified. Lance knew he could never tell Keith what happened tonight. Lance took a deep breath and let it out slowly. When he returned to the bedroom Keith had rolled over to his other side. Lance climbed into bed next to him, laid down on his stomach, and tried to get back to sleep. And to get Keith’s back out of his mind once and for all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WOWOWOWOWOW so i just went full cliche and made them share one bed because why the fuck not. i enjoyed writing this very much  
> also please let me know your thoughts!!!! i thrive off of attention!!!!


	12. Chapter 12

Lance woke up that morning with a monster headache. “Uggghh.”

“Morning,” Keith muttered. Lance wanted to groan in frustration. Hearing Keith’s groggy morning-voice was already hell on Lance’s body. How was Lance going to survive an entire day like this? Lance braced himself before getting out of bed, still wincing when the headache pounded on and off. He went for his bag to get ready and heard shuffling behind him, but didn’t dare turn around. 

“You ready to write five songs?” Keith croaked. 

_ Don’t look don’t look don’t look. _ Lance cleared his throat. “Uh, yeah.”

Keith paused. “You okay?”

Lance barely glanced at him out of the corner of his eye. “Huh? Oh, yeah. I’m fine.” He finished getting dressed and headed to the bathroom to brush his teeth.

To say Lance had trouble focusing that day would be an understatement. Not only was he deliriously tired, but every time Lance caught Keith’s gaze he’d remember the previous night, causing his face to heat up like an oven. So Lance avoided Keith’s gaze as much as he could, even though he could feel Keith looking at him in confusion when Lance looked away. 

After having breakfast together the two bands headed to the garage to start working on their songs. Lance gaped as he took in Pidge’s garage. Allura had been right. It had been converted into nothing short of a recording studio, with soundproof material padding the walls and floor, and reverb panels spaced evenly along the walls. It was a huge garage, so each band had more than enough space to practice without getting in the way of each other, and there were a couple guitars and bass guitars sitting in stands in the corner.

“Pidge, I didn’t know you could also play guitar!” Shay said, her eyes wide with awe. “That’s amazing!”

Pidge blushed. “Oh, no, those aren’t mine. They’re my brother’s. He’s played guitar and bass ever since I was little.”

Pidge helped them find the right cables and outlets to plug everything in to, and within a few minutes everyone was set up. Lance gathered with his band in one half of the garage, while Keith and his band were in the other. Lance glanced over his shoulder. Keith was talking to Shiro about something. He caught Lance’s eye again, and Lance immediately looked away. No use going down that path. Lance had a funny feeling this day was going to be longer than he thought.

* * *

For the next few hours the two bands did nothing but write, play, and write. Lance would write a little bit on his sheet music, have his band members play it out to see how it sounded, and fix anything that needed to be fixed. He needed help with the lyrics this time, and Allura was more than eager to help. They were on their third song when Lance felt himself reaching the end of his concentration.

“Arggh, I can’t do it,” Lance complained, leaning back in his chair. Adam had helped Pidge set up two folding tables so that they could write on something. “I can’t do anything else.” 

“Why don’t we take a break?” Shiro suggested, walking over to them from his side. “We’re feeling pretty burnt out, too.”

“What time is it?” Lance asked. He checked his watch. “Holy crap, it’s almost lunchtime.”

“That’s my calling,” Hunk said, taking his bass off. “We should all go make lunch, then.”

“Sounds good,” Allura agreed.

The eight of them headed back to the kitchen and started preparing lunch. Throughout the preparations Lance could feel Keith’s gaze on him, and Lance was finding it increasingly difficult to avoid looking his best friend in the face. At one point Keith bumped into him on accident, and Lance received such a system shock that he yelped. Like, actually,  _ yelped. _ He’d passed it off as just some silly, random thing, but Lance was at the end of his rope. He didn’t know how long he could keep avoiding Keith. But what choice did he have? Every time he looked at his best friend he thought about how hot his skin had been with Keith’s arm around his waist. And when their faces had been so close, Lance had thought he’d been about to die. 

After lunch they went back to writing songs, and Lance was determined to focus on the writing process. He drank three cans of Coke—the sugar and caffeine helped him concentrate—and put all of his energy into finishing at least a rough draft of the five songs they could potentially perform. The sun had already gone down by the time he and his band finished them, but as soon as Lance put the last bracket in place he slammed his pencil on the table, shot to his feet, and raised his arms to the sky.

“Yeeessss!!!!” Lance cried. “Finally finished!!!”

“Dude, you’re not the only one here,” Hunk said. He turned to Keith’s band. “Sorry, guys. He’s like this sometimes.”

Adam chuckled. “No worries. We were just about finished here. Right, Keith?”

Keith looked Lance straight in the eye. “Right.” His expression was hard, like he was thinking about something unpleasant. Lance swallowed as Keith’s naked back flashed in his mind again, and he averted his gaze. Hot shame washed over him. What was he doing? Avoiding his best friend, barely making eye contact, and not speaking to him? Lance was a coward, that was for sure. What kind of a friend was he?

Luckily the others didn’t notice, and The Legendary Defenders did an unplugged stumble-through of their songs. Lance turned to his friends and did the same, slowly going over the songs with them to hear the major points and how they sounded. Lance made some quick notes on the scores, stuff he’d have to figure out tomorrow, and took his guitar off. As he lifted his guitar over his head he caught a whiff of his own sweat, and Lance cringed. He smelled like crap. 

“I need to shower,” Lance remarked.

Pidge snorted. “Yeah, you do.”

“Whatever.” Lance rolled his eyes as he grinned. “You probably do, too.”

“I think we could all use a hot bath,” Allura said, setting her guitar in its case and stretching her arms over her head. 

“Dinner first, please,” Adam called over. Lance looked over to see them finishing up as well, turning off the amps and putting their instruments away. 

They all agreed to eat something before anything else, and they went back to the kitchen to heat up the leftovers from lunch. When Lance sat down in the living room he watched as Keith headed over. Keith gave him a long look from an unreadable expression before sitting down between Adam and Allura. Lance’s heart sank. Oh, man. He’d really screwed it up. But he hadn’t expected to feel this hurt over Keith not sitting next to him. It felt like someone repeatedly punching him in the gut. Was that what Keith had been feeling all day? Damn, Lance was  _ such _ an asshole. He needed to apologize to Keith as soon as possible. But how? 

* * *

Lance finished brushing his teeth and headed back to the bedroom, taking a seat on the bed. Keith hadn’t joined him yet, which Lance took to mean  _ he _ was the one being avoided this time. Lance sighed as that same unpleasant feeling gripped his chest. Dammit, why did Lance have to go and mess things up? He should have forgotten about the spooning and gone on his merry way. How was he going to make it up to Keith?

“Hey,” Keith said, walking up to the doorway. “Do you wanna’ take a walk?”

The sight of Keith in front of him almost made Lance want to cry. He felt awful about being such a dick, and the fact that Keith still wanted to talk to him was nothing short of a miracle. Lance got to his feet. “Um, y-yeah. Sure.” 

Keith nodded and headed downstairs, leaving Lance to grab a jacket, put on some socks, and follow. The two of them went through the back door, following a thin trail that led into the woods from the back of the house. Keith used a borrowed flashlight to light the way, and its beam was strong enough that Lance could lag behind a little bit. He still wasn’t sure if Keith was mad at him, although he had every right to be.

“Um, K-Keith?” Lance started. 

Keith stopped and turned to look at Lance. And Lance felt instantly worse at the sight of the hurt on Keith’s face. “Why were you avoiding me today? Did I do something wrong?”

“Shit, no,” Lance said. “No, no you didn’t do anything. It’s all my fault. I was avoiding you because I’m an idiot.”

Keith’s hurt was still there, but now he looked confused as well. “So, then, why?”

Lance sighed and brought his hand to his face. He’d sworn to himself that he wouldn’t tell Keith about the spooning, but after seeing Keith’s face there’s no way Lance couldn’t explain why he’d been such a douchebag. “Well, actually, last night . . . um.”

Keith’s eyes widened in dismay. “Ohmygod. Did I do something to you in my sleep?”

Lance waved his hands in front of him. “N-no! Well, yes, but it’s not anything bad, trust me!”

Keith frowned. “What was it?”

“You, uh. . .” Great. Lance couldn’t even say the word without blushing. “Y-you, uh, kinda sp-spooned me? Last night?” He paused. “Which isn’t even that bad, honestly! It’s just that, uh, I wasn’t really expecting it and when you had your arm around my waist it was really hot—wait, I don’t mean  _ that _ kind of hot, I mean like the temperature. And we were a little too close for my comfort? I mean, not that I don’t like being around you, it’s just—”

“Lance,” Keith interrupted him. He looked really upset, with his eyebrows drawn in and his chin trembling as he frowned. “I’m  _ really _ sorry. I-I never meant to do anything, and if I crossed a boundary of any kind then I don’t know how to make it up to you.”

Suddenly Lance couldn’t stand it. He couldn’t stand seeing Keith with an expression like he was about to cry. Without thinking Lance stepped forward and grabbed Keith’s sleeve, pulling him to Lance in a tight embrace. Lance wrapped his arms around Keith, surprised to find he was just about the same height as him. He felt Keith let out an unsteady breath and slowly hug him back, his hands clutching Lance’s shirt.

“I’m sorry, Keith,” Lance murmured. “I was stupid to avoid you today, especially when it’s not even that big of a deal. I-I got caught up in my own head, and I didn’t know how to talk to you about it. I’m really sorry.”

Keith’s grip tightened. “I’m sorry, too. I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable.”

“I know you didn’t. Just forget about it, okay? To be fair, you’re good at being the big spoon. Now that I think about it, it was actually quite nice.”

Keith chuckled in his arms. “Thank you.”

They stayed like that for a moment longer, just hugging each other. Even though some part of Lance’s mind was telling him it was time to let go, he found that he didn’t really want to. He hadn’t been lying when he’d said he liked being around Keith. Lance closed his eyes and breathed in, noticing that something about Keith smelled kinda good. Was he wearing cologne? No, it wasn’t overpowering. It was just . . . nice. Maybe it was his shampoo. Whatever it was, Lance liked it.

Then Lance’s reasoning took over, and he cleared his throat as he pulled away from Keith. He still felt bad, especially when he caught Keith brushing at his eyes, but Lance was determined to make Keith feel better.

“Let’s head back,” Lance said. “I don’t know about you, but I’m really tired.”

Keith gave him a small smile. “Me too.”

The walk back was silent for a bit, but after a while Lance’s mind started churning again. “What were your past relationships like?”

Keith raised an eyebrow in confusion. “Huh?”

“Well, you know,” Lance said, “I was thinking that you really are good at spooning. So how did you get so good? You must have been a great boyfriend.” 

Keith gave a hesitant smile. “Oh, uh, I don’t know about that. I’m probably not the best person to judge whether I’m a good boyfriend or not.” He paused, and Lance gave him time to gather his thoughts. “My past relationships were . . . surface level.”

Lance blinked. “Surface level?”

Keith nodded. “I was never really close with any of my exes, you know? I kind of . . . held them at a distance. It was probably due to unresolved family issues I had at the time, but still. None of them were really deep connections. It was usually just because we were physically attracted to each other, or we had one or two similar hobbies. We’d break up after a few weeks.”

Lance swallowed. He didn’t know why, but he felt kind of uncomfortable hearing about Keith’s ex-girlfriends. The idea of Keith being with someone, kissing them, being intimate with them, and having sex with them . . . made Lance’s insides churn with an unpleasant feeling. He was glad Keith was single now. “What was the longest you ever stayed with someone?”

“Two months,” Keith answered. “We had more in common than usual, and for some reason it stuck longer. But it ended after those two months. We just . . . didn’t like each other like that anymore.” He paused, looking over at Lance. “What about you? What were your past relationships like?”

Lance gave a nervous laugh. “Oh, haha. You know. The usual.”

Keith gave him a look. “No, I don’t. Spill, Lover-Boy. You didn’t give yourself that nickname for nothing.”

Lance sighed. “Fine. When I was in high school I thought I was the hottest, coolest guy to ever walk the Earth. So I was a huuuuge douchebag when it came to girls. I hit on them, flirted with them, and basically assumed every girl wanted to be with me. So of course when I actually  _ did _ get girlfriends, I wasn’t very good to them. I don’t think I even liked half the girls I dated. I just dated them ‘cuz they were hot.”

Keith inhaled through his teeth. “Yikes, McClain.”

Lance felt his face grow hotter. “Don’t remind me, dude. Anyway, there were only two girls I actually had genuine feelings for. A girl in my senior year, and Allura.”

“What happened with the girl your senior year?”

“We dated for about three months, give or take a week,” Lance replied. “She moved away in the second half of senior year, and of course when you’re seventeen you don’t know what it means to be in a long distance relationship. So we broke up.”

“And you haven’t been with anyone since?”

Lance shook his head. “I was crushing on Allura the whole time. So, it never really occurred to me to date anyone else.”

Keith didn’t reply. They walked back to the lodge in silence, but it was a comfortable silence. Lance was realizing that a lot of things felt comfortable around Keith. Which Lance liked, because it meant their friendship was growing stronger. Lance hoped to be friends with Keith for a long time. They stepped inside the house, but before Lance did anything Keith turned to him with a grin. 

“You said you wanted to learn my guitar skills, right?” he asked.

Lance blinked. “Well, yeah. Duh.”

“Why don’t we do that now?”

“Uhh, because it’s like the middle of the night?”

“Perfect. There’s no one else around.”

Lance felt his own grin spreading on his face as he followed Keith to the garage. Keith turned the lights on and went for his guitar, unbuckling the snaps on the case. He brought it and pulled it over his head, and Lance gazed in awe at how beautiful it was. A sunburst Les Paul Gibson. It was probably the kind of guitar Lance wanted most. Really any kind of Les Paul Gibson, but the sunburst was especially cool. Lance went and brought out his own guitar, a red Yamaha Pacifica, and pulled it over his head. 

“Okay, come here,” Keith said. “I’ll show you the exercise that helped me the most with riffs.” He paused. “Although, if I recall, you don’t seem to have much of a problem with riffs, huh?”

Lance felt himself blush and sputtered. “Pff, y-yeah. But show me anyway.”

Keith chuckled. “Okay. Watch.” He played through the exercise slowly, which was a simple scale going from the high E string up the fretboard to the low E string. Lance played it as Keith had showed him, but Keith shook his head. “Wait, hold on.”

Keith twisted his guitar so it was resting against his back and came up behind Lance. He put his hand on Lance’s, shifting the fingers so they were in a slightly different grip than before. Lance swallowed at the tingling that spread across his skin from Keith’s touch. “Okay, try it like that.”

Lance played the scale with his fingers in the new grip, despite his racing heart, and found that it was already much easier for him to play. He started to speed it up, getting giddier the faster he went. 

“That’s it!” Keith said. “You’ve got it!”

Lance stopped playing and locked gazes with him. A wide smile spread on their faces. “That’s it? That’s all the exercise is?”

Keith nodded. “Yep. I warm up with that exercise every time. I start at around 80 bpm and go as fast as I can go. I try to go up at least one bpm every day.” 

“What’s the fastest you can play it?”

“150.”

“What?!” Lance gaped. “That’s crazy!”

Keith smirked. “Not as crazy as you might think. Anyway, now you know.” He moved to set his guitar back in its case, and Lance watched him with wide eyes. Then a thought occurred to Lance, and he hurried to put his own guitar away.

“Keith, come upstairs with me right now,” Lance said.

“Wait, why?”

“Just do it!”

He dragged Keith upstairs with him to the bedroom, remembering to turn the lights off as they went. Lance pulled him into the room and sat him on the bed before turning around to rummage through his suitcase. Where was it? Oh, there! Lance pulled out the container and grinned.

“Uh, whatcha got there?” Keith asked.

Lance faced him. “Have you ever used a face mask?”

Keith frowned. “You mean like a sleeping mask?”

Lance rolled his eyes. “No, silly. I mean like a clay face mask.”

“No, I can’t say that I have.”

“Well, you’re about to.”

Keith gave him a suspicious look. “Lance, I’m not sure about this.”

“Please,” Lance said. “Your skin needs to be nourished every now and then. Just let me put it on you and you’ll see how much softer your face will be after.”

Keith sighed and held his hands up. “Fine. I concede.”

“Alright, come with me.”

They went to the bathroom together, where Lance instructed Keith to sit on the toilet seat. Lance unscrewed the lid and popped it off, exposing the dark green paste inside. Keith still looked wary, but Lance told him to relax and started applying it. Almost as soon as Lance started doing that he realized that it might not have been the best decision for his nerves. Every time he put the paste on Keith’s face Lance felt his heart stutter and his gut swirl. He swallowed and tried to keep his reactions in check as he finished slathering Keith’s face with clay.

“Done!” Lance said. “Now just let it dry for fifteen minutes, and when you take it off your face will be as soft as a baby’s butt.”

Keith looked at himself in the mirror and sighed. “Why did I sign up for this?”

Lance grinned. “Just trust me.”

Once the fifteen minutes were up and Keith had washed the paste off, Lance could already see the effect. Without thinking he reached forward and placed his hand on Keith’s face, stroking Keith’s cheek with his thumb. He marveled at how soft it was. “See? Told ya.”

But then Lance met Keith’s gaze and realized just how close their faces were. He immediately heated up and pulled back. “Uh, sorry. Just an impulse, I guess.”

Keith looked pretty red too. “Uh, it’s f-fine. My skin does feel pretty soft now.”

Lance gave him a lopsided smile. “I knew it would.”

The two of them went back to the room and talked a bit about meaningless things until their exhaustion caught up to them. Lance was still apprehensive about sharing a bed with Keith, only because he couldn’t get rid of that burning sensation in his gut. It was like a small flame had been lit at the bottom of Lance’s stomach, and it constantly reminded him of his need to be physically closer to Keith. It never got extinguished, only dimmed, and Lance didn’t know what it meant. After today he felt like he should talk to Keith about it, but some part of him knew that this wasn’t something that friends normally felt for each other. But Lance didn’t want to delve too deeply into what it meant. He’d be fine for the time being, the feeling slowly burning inside him.

Keith got into bed first and Lance joined him, pulling the cover up to his chin. Keith shifted so he was laying on his left side facing Lance. “I’m not really sure what I’ll do in my sleep. So, sorry if I end up spooning you again. You can wake me up if you want. I won’t mind.”

Lance felt the flame grow hotter in his gut, but he blocked it out. Lance didn’t want Keith to cry again because of him. So he gave his best friend a huge smile. “Don’t worry about it, dude. If it happens I’ll just go right back to sleep. We’re friends, aren’t we?”

A soft smile curled Keith’s mouth. “Best friends.”

“Then it should be fine.”

Keith nodded and closed his eyes, still on his left side. Lance’s smile melted as he watched Keith fall asleep, and within a few minutes Lance could hear Keith’s deep and even breathing. The burning in Lance’s gut quieted. Lance was really lucky to have such a good friend. He really had been an ass to Keith today. Lance still felt bad about it, but knew that he should move past it now that they’d both apologized to each other. Lance let his gaze roam over Keith’s sleeping face, and the corner of his mouth turned up in a smile. Keith  _ was _ really peaceful when he slept. Lance gently reached forward and brushed Keith’s bangs away from his forehead. 

He smiled to himself again. “Heh. Baby-soft skin.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> don't worry friends it's coming!!!!! the next few chapters move things along!!


	13. Chapter 13

The three-day weekend proceeded normally after that. Each band finished writing their songs, and on Monday they traded tips and tricks that helped them with their instruments, or even with writing songs in general. Lance was glad he’d made up with Keith, and they texted each other on the car ride home again. The rest of the week Lance spent at school, practicing the songs, or at work. Life was back to normal. Although Lance was suddenly having a hard time getting to sleep. He found himself missing having Keith in the bed next to him, which Lance dismissed almost as soon as the thought occurred to him.

Lance had finished brushing his teeth one night when he got a text from Keith asking if he could call. Lance smiled and called him instead. “Hey. What’s up?”

“Hey, Lance,” Keith replied. Lance closed his eyes at the sound of Keith’s voice next to his ear. He hadn’t heard it in a while. “I was wondering if you wanted to hang out this Saturday.”

“I’m not free on Saturday,” Lance said.

“How about Sunday?”

Lance thought about his schedule. “Yeah, I’m free after work. My shift ends at twelve.”

“Great,” Keith said. “I was thinking we could go to Magicfair?”

Lance’s eyes widened. “The amusement park? I thought you said you weren’t good at planning stuff like this.”

Keith chuckled. “I’m making an effort, here.”

“Fine, fine,” Lance said through a smile. “Magicfair sounds good.”

“Okay, I’ll see you then.”

They worked out the details of who was driving and what time they’d leave, and when Lance hung up he closed his eyes. Yep, the flame was definitely still burning. It had been quiet this past week when he hadn’t seen or heard from Keith, but whenever he texted or called, Lance found his insides melting. They were melting now. Lance opened his eyes and sighed. Why was he still feeling this way whenever he talked with Keith? He was a friend, just like any of Lance’s other friends. And yet things still felt . . . different with him. Lance wanted to be around him all the time, and he didn’t even know why. All Lance could do was wait for Sunday to come around.

* * *

After work on Sunday Lance showered, got dressed, and headed over to Adam and Shiro’s place. Keith told him they’d be just at the end of their rehearsal by the time Lance got there, and Lance didn’t mind. Lance had even left a bit early so he might have a chance to watch Keith rehearse.

Lance got to Adam and Shiro’s place early, and he could already hear them playing in the garage. He walked to the front door, which Keith had told him was unlocked, and headed inside. He followed the sound of the band, reaching the garage door and slowly opening it. And when he looked inside, he could see Keith. Keith was wearing a tank top that was slightly bigger than him, so when Keith moved around as he played, one of the tank top straps slid down his shoulder. It was pretty hot in the garage, and from where he was standing Lance could see the sweat on Keith’s forehead. Which made Lance notice that Keith’s hair was pushed out of his face with a headband. Not just a sports headband, either, but an actual plastic headband like the kind Lance’s sister wore. And Lance thought Keith looked ridiculously attractive with it.

They finished playing, and Keith turned to his band members to give them notes. He caught Lance standing in the doorway and a smile lit up his face. “Hey, Lance. I’ll be ready in a few minutes.”

Lance nodded and swallowed. “R-right. Take your time, dude. I’ll be here.”

Keith went back to talking with his bandmates, each of them giving their own input on what they should change or fix in the song. Lance backed out of the garage, heading to the living room so he could sit down and put his head in his hands. What the hell? Why was Keith suddenly so good-looking to Lance? Well, it’s not like Keith hadn’t been attractive before, but it was like Lance was seeing him with new eyes. He couldn’t stop thinking about Keith in that tank top with his bangs pushed back, and Lance’s brain was short-circuiting. 

Keith came into the living room with a small towel around his neck. “Hey. I just have to go shower and then I’ll be ready to go. You okay?”

Lance looked up to see a sweaty Keith standing over him, his hair still pushed back and his tank top strap still off his shoulder. Lance swallowed against a dry throat. “Y-yeah. Actually, do you have any pain killers? I have a headache.”

“Pain killers? Yeah, sure. Let me get Shiro.”

Lance’s gaze followed Keith as he headed back to the garage. A moment later he came out with Shiro behind him. “Hey, Lance. Keith said you have a headache. Let me get you some pain killers and some water.” 

Lance felt kinda bad for lying about the headache. “Thanks, Shiro.”

“No problem.”

Shiro headed to the kitchen while Keith stayed behind. “I’m gonna’ go shower now. I’ll see you in a bit.” Lance muttered a reply and Keith walked to the bathroom down the hall.

Shiro returned with the pain killers and a glass of water, and Lance eagerly chugged it down. Had his throat always been this dry around Keith? And  _ why _ was his throat so dry? Why did seeing Keith like that shake Lance up so much? It’s not like he had a crush on Keith or anything. For the billionth time, Lance told himself he was straight.  _ I’m straight, there’s no way I have a crush on Keith. _ He didn’t. He couldn’t.

“So, you and Keith are going somewhere?” Shiro asked.

Lance nodded. “An amusement park.”

“An amusement park?” Shiro echoed. He was silent for a bit. “Huh.”

“What?”

Shiro smiled. “Nothing. I hope you two have fun.”

He stood up just as Adam exited the garage, and Shiro walked over to put a hand on his waist. “Hey, sweaty. You wanna’ go shower?”

“Sure. Are you gonna’ be there?”

“Maybe.”

“I’ll take that as a ‘yes’.”

Shiro chuckled. “Okay. I’ll join you in a minute.” Adam winked and headed upstairs to the second bathroom. Lance had watched the exchange with curious eyes. It was weird for him to think about, but Lance had never really seen a gay couple interact before. 

“Shiro, how did you know you were gay?” Lance blurted. He immediately shut his mouth.  _ Great job, Lance.  _ He didn’t know if it was appropriate to ask someone that, especially since he and Shiro weren’t even that close.

Shiro blinked, then laughed. “You don’t have to look so scared, Lance. I’m not gonna’ bite you just for asking that. I don’t mind answering.”

Chagrin rose to Lance’s cheeks and he gave a wobbly smile. “Sorry.”

Shiro sat in the chair next to him. “Don’t be. It’s pretty simple, actually. I wasn’t attracted to girls in the same way my male friends were. I could love them as people and friends, but never romantically.”

Lance thought about that. “Okay, but how did you  _ know? _ Didn’t you wonder for a while?”

Shiro sighed. “Yes, there was that. It took me a while to understand why I didn’t feel the things for women that I feel for men. For a long time I thought I was broken.” He chuckled. “But there was this one guy I met my first year of college who I just fell head over heels for. And that was it, for me. I accepted my sexuality and I couldn’t be happier.”

Lance didn’t say anything for a bit. Shiro made it sound so easy. It couldn’t be that simple, could it? For one, how did Shiro realize what he was feeling for guys was romantic? And how did he know he  _ didn’t _ feel those things for girls? 

Shiro gave him a cheeky look. “Why do you ask?”

Lance realized what he was implying. “Oh, nonono, it’s not like that. I’m one-hundred percent straight, for sure. Absolutely, without a doubt, straight. I like the girls. Exclusively. Nooooo guys for me.”

Shiro looked amused. “It’s alright, Lance. I’m not the one you should be trying to convince.”

“Wha—I’m not trying to  _ convince _ you, it’s just the truth!”

“I know. But you seemed awfully determined there, for a sec.” Shiro gave him a kind smile before getting up and heading upstairs to join his boyfriend in the shower.

* * *

Traffic was light as Lance and Keith drove to the amusement park. Keith hooked up his Spotify playlist to the car’s speakers, and Lance was pleasantly surprised to find a lot of his favorite songs on there. They sang along to  _ Bohemian Rhapsody _ , and Lance purposefully sang off key so he could see Keith laugh. It was the first time the two of them had been in the car alone together, and Lance was perhaps a bit too excited. He almost ran three different red lights, and he kept having to assure Keith that he was actually a good driver.

They reached Magicfair about half an hour later, and after waiting in line for their tickets they were through. Lance grinned as he took in the rides around him. He loved going to Magicfair. The bathrooms always smelled terrible, and the food was overpriced and pretty low quality, but it carried a lot of fun memories for him. 

He turned to Keith with a wide smile. “You ready to go on all the big roller coasters?”

Keith’s eyes widened. “Uh, are you sure?”

“What, are you saying you’re scared, Kogane?”

“Psh, y-yeah right,” Keith muttered, avoiding Lance’s probing gaze.

Lance smirked. “You’re totally scared.”

“Am not!”

“I’ll race to Drop Zone!” Lance took off running, leaving Keith to chase after him. They arrived at the line breathless, but Lance still had a huge smile on his face, as did Keith. Keith met Lance’s gaze and held it, making the warm feeling travel all over Lance’s body. Lance broke the gaze when they moved up in line, which disappointed him a bit. 

“This is the ride that goes straight down, isn’t it?” Keith asked.

Lance nodded. “Yep. Hence the name, ‘Drop Zone’.”

Keith grinned wickedly. “I’ll bet you’re gonna’ pee your pants once this ride finishes.”

“No way, dude,” Lance said. “I’ve been on this ride hundreds of times.”

“Uh-huh. Ten bucks says you’ll pee your pants.”

“I’ll take that action.” Lance took a step closer to Keith, narrowing his eyes at him. “But my ten bucks says that you’ll burst into tears once it’s done.”

Keith leaned closer to Lance, so close that Lance could see faint scar above his eyebrow again. Lance swallowed and tried his best to keep from blushing or looking away. “You’re on.”

They went on the ride. Neither of them cried or peed themselves. In the end they were just two idiots betting on each other’s misfortune.

“Well, that was a bust,” Lance said as they walked out of the ride. “The ride was fun though.”

“What, you’re mad that you get to keep ten bucks?” Keith teased. “But you’re right, the ride was fun.”

Lance grinned at him. “Well, if you liked that one, there’s plenty more where that came from.”

Keith grinned back. “I bet.”

The two of them went on every scary roller coaster in the park, coming up with more and more outrageous bets as they continued. At this point, Lance was trying to think of the most ridiculous scenarios just so that he could make Keith laugh. He loved seeing and hearing Keith’s laugh. It filled him with that warm, fuzzy feeling that he got whenever Keith did something especially amazing.

“Hey, did you know there’s an aquarium here?” Keith asked as they were in line to get churros.

Lance gasped. “What?! No way! How did I not know that?”

“They built it a couple years ago,” Keith explained. “I’ve been here a few times since then, and it’s pretty cool.”

“We’re going there right now.”

“Uh, our churros?”

“Nope. Aquarium first.”

Keith laughed. “Just wait, Lance. It’ll be there after we get our churros.” 

Lance pouted as he waited for the food, but he was secretly glad he waited. The churros were excellent as far as fried sugary foods went. The two of them ate as they walked towards the aquarium, and Lance could hardly contain his excitement. He hadn’t been to an aquarium in forever due to school or work getting in the way, and he missed it with every fiber of his being. He quickened his pace, getting a questioning look from Keith, but Lance didn’t care. He needed to be in that aquarium. 

They finally arrived and Lance jumped a little in the air. “Yes! Keith, look, it’s the aquarium!!”

Keith chuckled as he gazed at Lance. “I can see that, Lance. You must really like the aquarium, huh?”

“You wouldn’t believe,” Lance said. “Let’s go in!”

The aquarium, although small, was amazing. Lance flitted from one display to the next, trying to consume everything at once. Eventually they reached the jellyfish display, which was Lance’s favorite part. They entered a darkened room, where the main light sources came from the jellyfish’s containers. 

Lance walked over to an exhibit filled with lion’s mane jellyfish. The jellyfish glowed orange, illuminating the space in front of them, and he let out a deep sigh. “Wow.” Keith came up to him, and from Lance’s peripherals he could see Keith staring at him. After a while Lance looked over at Keith. “What?”

“Nothing.” A small smile tipped the corners of Keith’s mouth up. “You looked like you were enjoying yourself.”

Lance nodded. “Yeah. Jellyfish are one of my favorite things in the whole world.”

Keith smiled wider. “I like seeing you so happy.”

Lance couldn’t stop himself from smiling even if he wanted to. He locked eyes with Keith and felt the whole room disappear. Keith’s words might just have been casual, but to Lance they wrapped around his heart and filled his chest with emotion. “I like seeing you happy, too.”

Something flashed in Keith’s gaze and he looked away. “Thanks. I, uh, heard there’s a short documentary at the end of the aquarium. It’s about sharks.”

“Sharks?” Lance was immediately interested. “Let’s go right now!”

He bypassed the rest of the jellyfish, coming to a stop in front of the tiny theater where the movie was playing. Lance went in and sat down at the back, with Keith joining him a moment later. The screen said the next movie would play in about five minutes, so Lance told Keith about the ocean in the meantime.

“There’s this one thingy called the ‘chromodoris lochi’,” Lance said, “and it’s basically the cutest thing in the world.”

Keith raised an eyebrow. “‘Thingy’?”

Lance shrugged. “Well, I don’t know what species it is specifically. But here, look.” Lance took out his phone and showed Keith a picture of the chromodoris lochi. He had a bunch of sea life pictures on his phone.

Keith leaned in to look. “Wow, it is really cute.”

“Right?” Lance said. “And there’s another one called a mantis shrimp and it’s the coolest thing ever! Its punches can go as fast as fifty miles-per-hour, and they have the same force as a .22 caliber bullet.”

Keith’s eyes widened. “Woah, that’s awesome. I never knew how cool the ocean was.”

Lance puffed his chest out. “Yeah, I’m basically an expert on it.”

“Says the man who just called the chromodoris lochi a ‘thingy’.”

Lance rolled his eyes. “I don’t have time to remember  _ everything _ , Keithy-boy.”

“Don’t call me that.”

“Wait, the movie’s starting!”

The two of them watched the quick documentary about sharks, with Lance making whispered exclamations to Keith every minute or so. Keith  _ shushed _ him multiple times, but he looked like he was enjoying Lance’s antics so Lance kept it up. By the end of it Lance hadn’t learned anything new, but it had been fun to watch it with Keith. 

When they left the aquarium Lance was surprised to see how dark it was. “Woah, it’s sunset already.”

“We probably didn’t notice the time going by,” Keith said. “I’m actually kinda hungry, so do you wanna’ ride the Ferris wheel before getting something to eat?”

“Yeah, sure.”

They headed in the direction of the Ferris wheel, taking their time as they walked. Even though they were gonna’ get food after this, Lance was sad to see the day finish so quickly. He wanted to spend more time with Keith. Lance smiled to himself. Even if today was over, he knew that he and Keith would be friends for a while. They had plenty of time to hang out. 

The two of them were almost at the Ferris wheel when someone bumped into Keith. The person stumbled a bit, causing their ice cream to fall, and Lance watched it hit the ground with a  _ splat _ . 

“Oh, man, I’m so sorry,” Keith said, holding his hand up towards them. “Are you okay?”

The person in question was a girl about their age. A really cute girl, Lance realized. She had a heart-shaped face and curly reddish-brown hair that was tied up in a ponytail, and Lance couldn’t help noticing that she looked really good in it. “Oh, I’m fine, really. I’m sorry for running into you.”

Keith frowned. “But I made you drop your ice cream. Let me buy you another one.”

“What?” The girl shook her head. “No, no, it’s fine. I don’t need another one.”

“Please, I insist,” Keith said. “Let me get it for you.”

The girl smiled, revealing dimples. “Okay. There’s an ice cream stand just over there.”

She pointed to it, and Keith turned to Lance. “I’ll be right back, okay?”

Lance blinked. “Okay.” 

Keith gave him a quick nod before walking over to the ice cream stand with the girl, and Lance watched them wait in line for the ice cream together. The girl said something and Keith smiled, and as Lance looked on he started to feel . . . bad. And not just bad, but like a weird, squirmy feeling in his gut that he didn’t like. They continued chatting and the girl said something else that made Keith laugh, and Lance felt his gut dip as the bad feeling intensified. Then Keith’s ex-girlfriends came to mind, and Lance felt like he was going to be sick. He was reminded of the fact that Keith had had relationships before. He’d been on dates, kissed them, and had been intimate with them in more ways than one, and the idea of a girl  _ doing _ stuff with Keith was enough to have Lance swaying on his feet. The blood roared in his ears, and he felt awful. His chest was tight and his gut was twisted into knots. 

Lance swallowed and tried to get rid of the dry feeling in his throat. What was happening to him? It was only natural that Keith had been in relationships before. So why did Lance feel like crying right now? Why did the sight of Keith talking to some random cute girl make him feel like this? Was Lance jealous? Jealous . . . of what? Of Keith? No, that couldn’t be. Lance barely knew that girl, and when he looked at her he could acknowledge the fact that she was cute. But he didn’t feel any kind of desire to be with her, physically or emotionally. But when he looked at Keith, all Lance could think about was being with him. Emotionally and . . .

“And physically,” Lance whispered. His shoulders dropped as a huge realization hit him. He wanted to be with Keith. Lance wanted to be with Keith as  _ more _ than a friend. “I want to be with Keith.”

Suddenly a bunch of things made sense to Lance. The reason why he found Keith so attractive, why he got butterflies around him, and why he felt such an intense desire to get as physically close to Keith as possible. It wasn’t just that Lance wanted to be friends with him. It was that Lance desperately,  _ achingly _ wanted to be with Keith. 

“But I’m not gay,”  he murmured. Lance  _ knew _ he wasn’t gay because he’d had feelings for girls before, and the idea of being with girls still very much appealed to him. He didn’t feel like anything was wrong when he was dating a girl. But at the same time, Lance couldn’t fight the fact that he was feeling things for Keith. Things that, he realized now, friends didn’t normally feel for each other.

Lance looked up as he spotted Keith heading back to him. Keith gave the girl a final wave before turning to him. “Alright, you ready for the Ferris wheel?”

How was Lance supposed to behave around Keith now that he knew he had feelings for him? Whatever Lance was going through, he didn’t want to deal with it now. He just wanted to spend time with his best friend. So he forced himself to smile. “Yep. Let’s go.”

They waited in line for a bit, and even though Lance had tabled his crisis for later, he still didn’t feel like talking much. Especially after getting super jealous of the cute girl earlier. Keith seemed to pick up on Lance’s mood, starting conversations at first but trailing off when Lance didn’t continue them. And that made Lance feel like the biggest jerk in the world, but he didn’t know how else to act. The one thing that kept repeating in his head was,  _ I like Keith. I like Keith. I like Keith. _

The two of them got in the Ferris wheel, sitting on opposite sides. Which of course disappointed Lance. The car climbed slowly into the sky. Keith hadn’t said anything yet, and Lance was sure it was because of his poor attitude earlier. So what if Keith wanted to talk to girls? It was none of Lance’s business.

They were about halfway up the wheel when Keith said quietly, “It’s beautiful, isn’t it?”

Lance glanced at Keith to see him gazing at the city. Lance followed his gaze to see the sun painting the city buildings a deep orange. The clouds were highlighted pink in the sky, and the gradient from orange to blue was stunning. “Yeah.”

“Um, sorry if I . . . said something. Earlier,” Keith said. 

Lance looked back at him. Keith looked kind of embarrassed. And Lance felt instantly more awful. “No, dude, you didn’t do anything. It’s me. I’m . . . just having a bad day.”

“What is it?”

Lance shook his head. “It’s nothing. Just something petty. It’s not even worth mentioning.”

“So tell me anyway.” Lance met Keith’s gaze, and Keith gave him a small smile. “I live for the stuff not worth mentioning. That’s what makes life fun.”

As the car climbed higher up the wheel the sun was able to touch them, and in an instant the small space was flooded with light. Orange and pink blended to make a color Lance didn’t know the name of, but Keith was immediately bathed in it and Lance forgot to breathe. The light refracted off the car’s glass windows to create sparkles and shines and a bunch of lighting effects that made Lance feel like he was in some kind of fantasy world. And in the middle of it all, was Keith. He was beautiful. In this light Lance could see the different shades of grey in Keith’s eyes. In this light Lance could see that Keith’s hair was actually a really dark brown, not exactly black. Lance was truly,  _ literally _ seeing Keith in a whole new light. And Lance couldn’t handle it. 

“I . . .,” he murmured. “I li . . .” Lance trailed off before he could finish the word.

Keith tilted his head. “Yes?”

“I l-lost my lottery ticket,” Lance finished lamely. “That’s why I’m upset.”

Keith raised his eyebrows. “Your lottery ticket? Sorry, dude. Did you think you had a shot at winning?”

Lance gave a shaky laugh and put in effort to carry on the conversation, but inside he was freaking out about how close he’d come to saying something he was  _ certain _ he would have regretted later. How stupid was he?? Yeah, the best way to confess to someone is to tell them in a Ferris wheel car where they’re trapped with you and can’t leave for the next 10 minutes. Especially when you haven’t sorted through your own feelings yet!

When they got off the Ferris wheel Lance told Keith he was going to the bathroom, and he quickly looked for the nearest one. Once inside Lance sat on the toilet seat and held his head in his hands. He was an idiot. He had almost confessed his feelings for Keith, and that would have ruined the friendship forever. Not to mention Lance wasn’t even one-hundred percent sure of his own feelings. It would have just complicated everything.

“Okay, Lance,” he whispered to himself. “You need to get past this or you will never save this relationship. Just pretend your feelings don’t exist, or shove them down, or whatever, and get back to being Keith’s best friend.”

Lance stood up and placed his hands on his hips as he widened his stance. He’d seen this on a TED talk somewhere. If he power-posed for a minute, he would feel more confident. Lance held the pose until his heart had calmed down, gave himself a definitive nod, and headed back out. 

“Dude, what took you so long?” Keith asked. “What were you even doing in there?”

“Power posing.”

“Huh?”

“Nothing. I’ll show you some other time.”

* * *

Lance was in a pickle. He laid on his bed and stared up at the ceiling, wondering how to get out of this pickle. He glanced at the clock to see the time. 3:52 AM. Lance sighed. Yep. Definitely one hell of a pickle. Lance needed to say something aloud to himself. But it was like every time he tried to, he couldn’t get the words past his lips. It was like his body wasn’t allowing him to say it.

Lance sighed again and got out of bed. Maybe typing it would be better. He brought up the word document he’d made before and looked at the list. 

 

  * __Whenever Kogane’s around I feel nervous__


  * _Whenever Kogane’s around I feel pissed_


  * _I can’t stop thinking about him?_


  * _Kogane is actually really good-looking?_


  * _During the riff off I felt . . ._



 

Wow, Lance really  _ was _ an idiot. How had he not known he’d had feelings for Keith before this? Of course he’d gone through that whole “am I gay” sexuality crisis, but Lance had thought it had been because of what Grant had insinuated, and not because of any actual feelings for Keith. Now, however. . . Lance let out a shaky breath and typed out a new list.

 

  * __Keith is really attractive__


  * _Whenever I’m around him I get nervous in a good way?_


  * _I want to hold him and be around him and spend time with him_


  * _I feel good around him_


  * _He feels different to me than my other friends_



 

Lance closed his eyes. Worrying about stuff like this was really not like him. Lance had always thought of himself as confident and self-assured, and even if he was worried about something he never let it show. But with his feelings for Keith, it’s like he couldn’t stop them from overflowing. He wanted to be with Keith so badly it hurt. Lance blinked. Wow. He wanted to be with Keith so badly it  _ hurt _ . Was that normal? Lance didn’t think that was normal. 

“Keith is my best friend,” Lance told himself. “The things I feel for him are just because our friendship is so strong. It doesn’t mean I actually want to kiss him or anything.”

But as soon as Lance said that he imagined what Keith’s lips would feel like, and Lance sucked in a painful breath as he bundled up in a ball on his chair. He squeezed his legs to his chest as tightly as he could, trying desperately to get rid of the feeling of exhilaration and, more importantly, desire. Lance couldn’t feel like this. He knew it wasn’t him; he knew wasn’t gay. The term didn’t resonate with him, and Lance deeply felt that he didn’t and couldn’t identify with it.

Lance shook his head. He needed to get his priorities straight. “I should just focus on the band right now,” he said. “The band and the contest are more important than whatever the fuck is going on with me. I can figure everything out once this whole thing is over.”

Lance repeated that to himself as he got back in bed and tried to get some much-needed sleep. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OHHHHHH SHIIITTTT HERE IT IS!!!!!!! Finally lance understands something about himself. BUT he’s still got a ways to go that will be revealed in the next chapters! at this point i have finished writing this series, so all that's left to do is upload it and hope you guys enjoy!


	14. Chapter 14

School was hell the next day. Lance had a quiz he wasn’t ready for, and couldn’t answer any question correctly when called on. He felt a headache coming on and just wanted to go home, but unfortunately he had a shift at work that day. As he walked back to his car, Lance thought about the one thing that was weighing on his mind the most: his feelings for Keith Kogane. He’d basically spent all of his class time thinking about it and trying to understand whether what he was feeling was real or not. But Lance had a hard time figuring it out. He knew he was attracted to Keith. That much was clear, from the fact that Lance had thought about kissing him more than once throughout the day. 

Lance got in his car and groaned in frustration. He needed to talk to someone about this. Someone who knew what it was like. Someone who could help him sort through what he was feeling. Then it came to him. 

“Duh, I’ll just ask Grant!” Lance said. “Ugh, I’m so smart sometimes.” With that plan in mind, Lance drove home so he could get dressed for work.

* * *

“Psst. Grant. Graaaaant.”

“I can hear you just fine, Lance,” Grant said, giving him a side eye. “There’s no need to whisper.”

“I’m whispering ‘cuz I need to ask you something serious,” Lance hissed. “And I need your help with something serious, too.”

Grant glanced at him and sighed. “Alright. When the rush dies down you can tell me all about it.”

Lance nodded. “Okay.”

The rush died down around the time it usually did, and after wishing the last customer a good day Grant turned to him. “Okay, Lance. Spill.”

Lance twiddled his thumbs together. He could feel his heartbeat in his throat, and his entire body was quivering. Damn, he hadn’t expected to be this nervous. “Well, I’m not really sure how to ask you about it? Also I’m kinda nervous to talk to you about it, even though I know you’ll be cool about it, but it’s also, like, really scary for me? So I’m not really sure—”

“Lance, if you don’t tell me right now I’m going to smack you with this cloth,” Grant deadpanned.

“Fine!” he said. Lance took a deep breath before looking Grant in the eye. “Number one: how did you know you were gay? And number two: I think I have . . . feelings for someone. A guy someone. And I don’t know how to process it.”

Grant’s eyes widened. “Ohhhhh,  _ that _ kind of serious thing. Hm. Okay.” He thought for a moment, propping his hand on his hip. “Well, that’s kind of hard to answer. For a long time, I  _ didn’t _ know I was gay. I assumed I was straight like everyone else.”

“What changed?” Lance asked.

Grant shrugged. “No clue. It was more gradual for me. I just found myself liking girls less and less, as romantic partners, anyway, and when I started getting feelings for guys I just went with it.”

Lance blinked. “You . . . you weren’t confused by it or anything?”

“A little.” Grant shifted his stance so he was leaning against the counter. “I was kind of wondering, ‘Why now’? Why am I getting feelings for guys now? But after revisiting my earliest memories and going through all my previous experiences with love, it was pretty clear that I was gay from the beginning. I just didn’t know it until later.”

Lance was silent. He was comparing Grant’s story to Shiro’s in his head. Shiro had known that he hadn’t been interested in girls, whereas Grant had just gone with the flow of his feelings. Lance didn’t find himself relating to either of their experiences, though.

“As for your feelings for this guy someone,” Grant continued, “what makes you think you have feelings for him?”

A hot blush spread across Lance’s face. “Uh, w-well.” He swallowed. “Whenever I think about him I get this kind of, uh, fuzzy feeling? And he’s really good-looking. And, uhh, when I saw him with a cute girl I got really jealous. I-I realized that I wanted to . . .” Lance trailed off. The thought of doing anything  _ remotely _ physical with Keith had him heating up to the point where he couldn’t think straight, and Lance pressed his head to the cold counter. “I don’t even know.”

Grant chuckled. “Wow, you’ve got it bad.”

Lance glanced at him. “So then I  _ do _ have feelings for him?”

“You said it yourself, didn’t you?” Grant shrugged. “You think you have feelings for him. And it’s pretty obvious that you do.” He paused. “Why is it hard for you to process?”

“I don’t know,” Lance groaned. “Maybe because I’ve been straight my whole life and I’m starting to feel things for a  _ guy _ of all people?”

Grant frowned. “Is it the idea of being gay that’s putting you off?”

Lance hesitated before answering. “Yes, but not because I think being gay is bad. I just don’t think it fits me. It doesn’t feel right to refer to myself as gay, if that makes sense. It, it doesn’t resonate with me, or something. Plus I still really like girls. I don’t want to give girls up forever.”

Grant narrowed his eyes. “Wait, let me get this straight. You know you like girls, right?”

Lance nodded.

“And now you like a guy, but you also still like girls?”

Lance nodded again.

Grant let out a deep sigh and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Lance, do me a favor and tell me what the acronym ‘LGBT’ stands for.”

“Lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender,” Lance answered. Then it hit him. “OHHHHHH!!!” 

Grant looked like he was in physical pain, but he started laughing nonetheless. He started laughing so hard that Lance couldn’t help but join him. Grant wiped at his eyes with his thumb. “Lance, you are such a dumbass sometimes.”

Lance thought about his revelation. “So you’re saying I could be bisexual?”

Grant took a deep breath, still calming himself down. “Probably. Does it feel right?”

“I don’t know.”

Grant put a hand on his shoulder. “How about this: do you know anyone who’s bi?”

A memory from a while back popped into Lance’s head. “Yeah, I do.”

“Then you should go to them and ask them how they knew they were bi. And then after you do that, go kiss that guy you have feelings for.”

Lance pursed his lips. “But he’s straight.”

Grant raised an eyebrow. “Then I wish you the best of luck.”

* * *

Lance glanced up at the building in front of him. He’d confirmed the meeting time earlier, sending a text after his shift ended. Lance swallowed. He was just as nervous as he was when talking to Grant earlier, and although the idea of being bisexual was significantly more appealing to Lance than being gay, Lance still wanted to make sure. And as Grant had said, asking someone who was actually bi would be a big step in helping Lance figure his own shit out. He took a deep breath and entered the apartment building. A minute later he was standing in front of the door. He took another deep breath, begged his nerves to settle down, and knocked on the door.

The door was flung open to reveal Coran’s smiling face. “Lance! It’s been forever, mate! Come on in, come on in!”

Lance was ushered into Coran’s apartment, taking in the amount of clutter around him. Although looking more closely Lance could see it wasn’t just clutter, but just a bunch of things Coran had collected over the years. Action figures, posters, costumes that hung on the walls. Lance took it in with wide eyes.

“Your apartment is awesome,” Lance said. “How did you get all this stuff?”

Coran puffed out his chest and twirled his mustache with one hand. “Well, Lance, it’s simple really. I was but a young boy when all of these so-called ‘vintage’ items were unpopular and affordable, so I was able to build my collection at a very young age. And now it’s worth thousands of dollars! But am I going to sell it? Absolutely not!”

Lance laughed. “Yeah, you’d better not. This stuff is super cool.”

Coran gave a sound of satisfaction. “Hmph. Glad to see someone who appreciates my art for what it is. Now sit, boy, sit. I’ll bring over some drinks. What do you like?”

“A Coke would be nice,” Lance said. He took a seat on the chair next to the couch, taking his time to look at everything in Coran’s living room. 

Coran joined him after a moment, setting the soda down in front of him. Lance took it gratefully, trying to mask the fact that his hands were starting to shake. He was still way too nervous for this, even though he knew Coran would be cool about helping him. Lance took another deep breath and let it out.

“So, what’ve you been up to lately?” Coran asked, sitting down on the sofa. “How’s the band going and everything?” Coran had been a friend of Allura’s father before he passed away, and was more like an uncle to Allura now. He accompanied Allura to their rehearsals sometimes, and Lance was always glad to see him. Coran was pretty funny, and he had a way of making Lance feel at ease.

Sadly that didn’t apply to Lance in this situation. Lance swallowed. “T-the band is going well. We’re in the finals for the band competition.”

Coran’s eyes widened. “What?! You’re in a band competition and Allura didn’t tell me? I swear, that girl. She’ll have to have a stern talking-to when I see her again. But congrats on getting to the finals! I’ll come see you when you guys perform.”

Lance gave a quick smile. “Thanks.” 

Coran grew concerned. “Lance, my boy, what’s wrong? You don’t seem like yourself.”

Okay. This was it. Lance would ask Coran now. “Coran . . . you’re bisexual, right?”

“You betcha!” he replied, a proud smile on his face. 

“So, uh, how did you know you were bisexual?” Lance asked.

Coran lightly scratched at his mustache as he thought. “Huh. That’s a good question. I guess I knew when I started getting attracted to men. It happened later in my life, but it happened. But I was also still very much into women. It took a bit of figuring out, but I finally came to the conclusion that I was bisexual.”

“But how did you know what you were feeling for guys was more than friendship?” Lance insisted.

“Because I wanted to have sex with them, Lance.”

Lance felt his face heat up, and he must have been as red as a tomato. “W-well, yeah, that’s part of it, b-but, uh, surely there’s more to it?” 

Coran gave him a kind smile. “Lance, why don’t you tell me what’s bothering you? I assure you, this is a safe space, and I’ll help you to the best of my ability.”

Lance sighed. “You’re right, I should just say it.” He took a sip from his can, giving him some time before he had to continue. “I think I might be bisexual. But I don’t know for sure.”

“Why do you think that?” Coran asked.

“Because I’m feeling things for my best friend,” Lance said. “Things that friends don’t normally feel for each other.”

“What’s your friend’s name?”

“Keith.”

“Do you want to have sex with him?”

“Coran!” Lance cried.

“I’m serious, Lance!” Coran replied. “When you’re with Keith, what do you feel?”

Lance swallowed and closed his eyes. He pictured Keith in his head, and Lance felt immediately better. His heart felt lighter, and a warm feeling filled his chest. “I feel good. Like nothing can go wrong when I’m with him. I also get really nervous, but not in a bad way. It’s nervous in a good way. I guess ‘excited’ would be the word for it.”

“Okay,” Coran said. “What else?”

“I . . .,” Lance trailed off. “Sometimes I’ll be with him and I’ll feel this, like, really strong desire to get close to him. Physically, I mean. And it’s not even a specific desire, but it’s like I have to be as close to him as physically possible. And then, when I am, my stomach feels really hot? It’s almost painful, actually.”

“Okay. So you’re wondering if your feelings are romantic, right?” Coran asked.

Lance nodded. 

“Well, to start with, you can have romantic feelings for someone without wanting to do anything sexual,” Coran said.

Lance blinked. “I can?”

“Yep. You feel a deeper connection with them than with others, and spending time with them makes you deeply happy. I actually have a few friendships like that,” he continued. “Just by being around them I feel different than with other friends, but I don’t have any desire to get physical with them beyond holding hands or hugging, and they know that.”

“I didn’t know that,” Lance murmured. “I guess that means I  _ do _ have romantic feelings for Keith.”

“Now, the question you have to ask yourself is: are you satisfied with just being around Keith?” Coran said. He had an unusually serious expression. “Or do you want to do more with him?”

“I—”

“Nope,” Coran cut him off. “Don’t answer me right away. Take some time to figure it out. And in the meantime, let me tell you something. If you’re having a hard time with labels and what kind of sexuality you are, focus on what you’re feeling. Your body will tell you what you want.”

Lance blinked, and he took a moment to process that. “Okay.”

“Actually, let me tell you something else,” Coran said, “but you have to promise not to tell Allura.”

“Okay.”

“When her dad, Alfor, and I were younger, I had an  _ enormous _ crush on him,” Coran admitted.

Lance’s eyes widened. “You did?!”

Coran laughed. “Yep, I did! He was smart and handsome and, most importantly, he put up with my craziness. I thought I was in love with him.”

“What happened?”

“He met Allura’s mum,” he replied. “And I saw how happy they were together and I knew it wasn’t meant to be for me. So I moved on. Trust me, I met many men after that who were happy to put up with my craziness. Some of them even begged.”

Lance blushed. “Okay, TMI.”

Coran laughed again. “Alright, I get it. My point is, go home, do some soul-searching, and find out what you want. It’s not that difficult, really. You just have to ask yourself the right questions.”

Lance gave him a small smile. “Okay. Thanks, Coran.”

“No problem, my boy! You know I’d be glad to help you anytime.”

Lance hugged him goodbye and left his apartment, Coran’s words swirling in Lance’s head. Focus on his feelings, huh? Lance thought he could do that. It couldn’t be that hard, right? All he had to do was find out what he wanted with Keith. And Lance knew what he needed to do to find that out.

* * *

Lance sat at his desk, his hands trembling as he opened his computer. For the first time he actually felt ready to ask himself about his own sexuality, and where better to do that than to try out the Kinsey scale test? He typed it into the search bar and clicked on the link. Lance let out a deep breath. This was it. He would be getting an answer one way or another. He went through the questions, answering them as honestly as possible. When it came to questions about doing things with other men Lance pictured Keith in his mind, and he had to take a second to press his hands to face as he waited for the burning in his gut to calm down. It took longer than he thought, but Lance finally finished the quiz and clicked on the “score” button. The page loaded, and Lance held his breath.

“‘Three: Equally heterosexual and homosexual’,” Lance read aloud. “I’m bisexual.”

Lance shot to his feet, raced to the bathroom, and looked himself in the eye. His pulse hammered in his throat, and he was still trembling. But he gazed at his reflection, opened his mouth, and whispered, “I’m bisexual.”

Then he said it louder. “I’m bisexual.”

And his shoulders relaxed as a huge wave of relief washed over him. It felt good to say it out loud. More than anything it felt  _ right. _ Lance felt like this was the word he’d been searching for, something to explain why he was so deliriously attracted to Keith even though he still liked girls. Lance giggled. He felt like smacking himself in the head. All this time he hadn’t even considered being bisexual an option, and now here it was, fitting him like a glove. He giggled again, then started chuckling, and soon he was laughing from relief. He started laughing so hard his stomach hurt, and he fell to the floor in a fit. Tears started forming in his eyes, which just made him laugh harder, and Lance slammed his hand on the ground at the hilarity of it all.

The bathroom door opened to show a worried Pidge and Hunk. Hunk had to speak a little louder to be heard over Lance’s laughing fit. “Uhh, Lance? Buddy? You okay, there?”

Lance inhaled quickly, trying his best to stop laughing so hard, but looking at Pidge and Hunk’s faces just sent him into another spiral. Pidge turned to Hunk. “I think he’s lost it.”

“N-no!” Lance forced out. “I’m f-fine!” He was starting to calm down, but the excitement from his new understanding of himself still made him feel like he was floating. “Guys! I finally figured it out! I’m bisexual!” 

Their eyes widened as huge smiles bloomed on their faces. Pidge burst into the bathroom, crouching down to pull Lance into a tight hug. “Yes, yes, yes! That’s so awesome, Lance!” 

Hunk joined them a second later, crushing the two of them in his arms. “Congrats, Lance! I’m so happy for you, dude!”

They all sat there laughing for a few moments, until Hunk set them down and Lance pulled back to wipe at his eyes. Lance had a crazy big smile on his face, and his cheeks were starting to hurt from holding it so long. “Thank you, guys.”

“How did you find out?” Pidge asked. “Wait,  _ when _ did you find out? And do you still have a crush on Allura or is it someone else?”

Lance shook his head. “No, I stopped liking her a while back. I, uh, actually have feelings for Keith.”

Hunk’s eyes widened. “No. Way!! Oh, dude, you have to tell him!”

Lance blinked. “Wait, what? Why?”

“Because Keith totally likes you back!” Pidge exclaimed. 

Lance’s eyes narrowed. “No, there’s no way he does.”

Hunk scoffed. “I’ve seen the way he looks at you, dude. He can’t keep his eyes off you for more than, like, three seconds.”

Lance blushed. “Th-that’s not true!”

“Aww, he’s blushing!” Pidge said, poking their finger into Lance’s cheek. “You  _ liiike _ him.”

“Of course I do! But he doesn’t like me like that!” 

“Oh, Lancy-boy,” Hunk sighed, shaking his head. “You poor, clueless child.”

“I’m not a kid!” Lance protested. 

Pidge put their hand on Lance’s head. “Don’t worry, little boy. You’ll understand soon enough.”

“Ugh,” Lance moaned. “I give up.”

“Hey, why don’t we get some pizza for dinner?” Hunk suggested. “I’m kinda hungry.”

“Me too,” Pidge agreed. “Lance?”

Lance glanced at them. “Fine. But you guys can’t tease me about Keith anymore, okay?”

Hunk grinned. “No promises.”

Lance groaned again. “Whatever. Let’s just go get that pizza.”

* * *

Later that night Lance lay in his bed, his mind reeling from what he’d discovered that day. He’d heard all sorts of accounts from people with different sexualities, and what they’re experiences had been. And now, Lance could add himself to that list. Because he’d finally realized he was bisexual.

“I’m bisexual,” he whispered, and a crazy big smile spread on his face. Lance couldn’t stop saying it to himself. It felt so good to know what he was, although part of Lance was beating himself over the head for not realizing that he could be bisexual earlier. He’d stupidly thought that he had to be gay or straight, when obviously that wasn’t the case. It’d just never occurred to him that he could be someone who likes boys and girls. And right now, Lance was certain that he liked a guy.

That brought another problem to his mind. What was he going to do about his feelings for Keith? Lance knew Keith didn’t feel them for him. Right? No, he didn’t. Lance knew he shouldn’t hope for that, since it was pretty much impossible that Keith would ever like him back. Lance felt a pang of sorrow in his chest at that thought. He’d never be able to be with Keith the way he wanted to be. So where did that leave him? 

Lance sighed. “I’ll just have to continue being Keith’s best friend. That’s all I can do for him right now.” He didn’t want to complicate anything, or worse, lose Keith’s friendship. “Yeah. Being friends is more than enough.” And even though Lance knew it wasn’t, he told himself it was until he fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not much in the way of plot for this chapter, but i wanted lance to take a moment to figure himself out. He finally discovered the word “bisexual”!!!! Meanwhile everyone else is face-palming until they pass out. But i’m glad he got there eventually!! I’m also glad i finally got to introduce coran ;)))))


	15. Chapter 15

“Okay, guys,” Lance said. He and his bandmates were gathered in the rehearsal room backstage. “The first round of the finals are here. We’ve been practicing really hard this past month-and-a-half, and we can win this thing by putting every ounce of our energy into it. Everyone ready?”

“Yeah!” they replied. Everyone had determined looks on their faces, and Lance felt his own nervousness dissipate. 

“Good,” he said. “We’ve still got some time before we go on, but just know that I’m crazy proud of you guys.”

“We’re proud of you too, Lance,” Allura said. “We couldn’t have gotten this far without you.”

Hunk’s chin trembled, and he looked ready to start crying. “Aww, guys . . . I just love you all so much!” He hooked everyone’s heads together, squeezing them in a hug.

“Oof, get off!” Pidge complained, even though they couldn’t stop smiling. “Yeesh, we get it.”

Lance chuckled. “Okay. I’m gonna hit the bathroom before we have to get into places. Be right back.”

Lance left the rehearsal room and made the trek to the bathroom. Keith hadn’t arrived yet, which was probably a good thing. Trying to act normally around Keith was becoming next to impossible for Lance, and the few times they’d hung out since going to Magicfair Lance had been hyper-aware of every word he’d said and action he’d made. He didn’t want to say something that would accidentally reveal his feelings, but it was harder than Lance had thought. For one, he couldn’t stop staring at Keith. And for two, Keith was really perceptive. So Lance had to keep himself on his toes. 

He finished up in the bathroom and rounded the corner, only to see a very tall person blocking his way. Lance looked up and frowned when he saw who it was. “If you could move your behemoth-like body out of the way, that would be greatly appreciated.”

Lotor smirked as he looked down at Lance. “Lance McClain, we meet again.”

“Not willingly,” Lance said.

Lotor just seemed to get more amused. “Lance, I have a question to ask of you.”

“And I have an answer: no.” Lance motioned to try and move past Lotor, but Lotor placed his hand on the wall, blocking Lance’s path. 

“You haven’t even heard my question yet.” Lotor leaned in slightly so his face was closer to Lance’s. “Surely you can do me the honor of hearing me out.”

Lance swallowed at Lotor’s proximity. Despite Lance’s distaste of him, Lance had to admit Lotor was good-looking. Which pissed Lance off even more. He wanted to get out this situation as fast as possible, which probably meant entertaining Lotor until he had finished his thought. Lance sighed. “Fine. What is it?”

“What’s your relationship to Keith Kogane?” Lotor asked, his eyes probing.

Lance stood his ground, trying not to break eye contact even as he felt his face heating up. “N-none of your business.”

Lotor’s expression became intrigued. “Ahh, so I was right. You’re together.”

“No, we’re not!” Lance blurted. Then he realized what a colossal mistake that was. Lotor simply looked more interested, his grin widening. “Wh-what I mean is, uh, Keith’s straight. And, and I don’t even have feelings for him! And anyway, why would you care?!”

Lotor stepped even closer to Lance, bringing their bodies almost flush together as he tipped Lance’s chin up with one hand. “Because. You’re simply adorable when you get all flustered like that. You could say that I fancy you, Lance McClain.”

_ God _ , Lance’s face was burning. And the pit of disgust in his stomach was twisting itself into a frenzy, leaving Lance to wonder how he was going to get out of this. He pulled away, taking a step back. “Y-yeah, well, I  _ don’t _ fancy you. At all. So can you just leave me alone?”

Lotor looked disappointed. “Tsk. Oh, well. Chasing someone who’s not interested is not generally my forte.” He grinned. “But if you’re ever interested in having the best night of your life, you know where to find me. Plus, I’d love to wake up to your face in the morning.”

Lance glared at him. “For the last time, I’m not interested. And I won’t ever be interested, asshole.”

Lotor just winked. “See you around, Lance McClain.”

Lotor turned to walk away, but as he did Lance called out after him. “Lotor!”

Lotor turned around. “Changed your mind already?”

Lance grit his teeth together. “Keith’s gonna’ beat you. He’s better than you in every way.”

Lotor looked on at him with a disbelieving expression. “We’ll see about that.”

* * *

“You ready?” Lance asked.

Keith nodded, slipping on his gloves. Although he hadn’t been wearing gloves in the other performances, Keith had told Lance they were a good-luck charm. “I’m ready.”

“You’d better be good out there,” Lance said, giving Keith a smile. “Otherwise I’ll have to show you up.”

Keith grinned back. “Looking forward to it, McClain. I just hope you know what you’re getting into.”

Lance rolled his eyes. “Puh-lease. Like I don’t know how dramatic you can be.”

Keith scoffed. “Me, dramatic? You’re the self-proclaimed drama-queen.”

“Hey, guys,” Shiro whispered, “the lights are going down. We should get on stage.”

Keith nodded. “Right.”

Shiro moved to get the instruments in place and Keith took a step to follow, but before he did he quickly turned around and pulled Lance in for a hug. Lance blinked and hugged him back. He could feel Keith shaking. He must really be nervous.

“You’ll do fine, Keith,” Lance said. “I know you will.”

“What if I mess up?”

“Then you mess up. But you’ll learn from it as well.”

Keith chuckled. “Right.” He pulled away from Lance, tugging on his gloves again. 

“Hey,” Lance said. He held up his fist in front of him. “Knock ‘em dead.”

Keith smiled and bumped Lance’s fist with his own. “Yeah.”

And then Keith was heading onstage to help move the rest of the instruments. Lance could feel himself start to shake with his own nervousness for Keith. He wanted Keith to do good. He wanted Keith to be amazing. And Lance knew he would be. Keith was unlike anyone Lance’d ever known. Lance watched them set up in the blue-out, and Keith glanced over at him. Lance gave him a huge grin and held up two thumbs, and Keith gave him a small smile in return. Even just the sight of that smile made Lance’s chest tighten in emotion, and Lance had to stop himself from reacting.

Keith’s performance passed by in a blur, but Lance remembered every detail of it. He remembered the expressions Keith made as he acted out what he was singing. Lance remembered the way Keith flipped his hair out of his face so he could see the guitar better. Lance remembered how he’d been rendered motionless just by hearing Keith sing the first few notes. Lance wondered how he’d gone for so long without realizing his own feelings for Keith. Lance was mesmerized by everything Keith did. 

But when the curtains closed and Lance moved his instruments on stage, he was reminded of the fact that Keith was straight. He’d had ex-girlfriends before. There was no way Lance’s feelings would ever be able to reach him. Lance settled his guitar against him and set his jaw. Even if they could never be a couple, Lance was happy to spend his days being Keith’s friend. Lance would rather keep silent about his crush than lose Keith’s friendship, and Lance took a deep breath as he let that feeling sink in. The curtains opened, and Lance faced the audience. It hurt. Knowing he’d never be with Keith hurt. But that was just how things were. So Lance straightened his spine, readied his pick, and began playing.

***

“Lance, did you see the results?” Keith asked.

Lance set the phone down and set it to speaker mode. “Yeah, we both made it to the next round! That’s awesome!” Unfortunately Lotor had too, but Lance was determined to ignore that. 

“Ugh, I’m so relieved,” Keith said. “I thought for sure I wasn’t going to go through.”

“What are you talking about?” Lance demanded. “You’re the most amazing musician I’ve ever met! I could hardly look away from you when you were on stage.” Then Lance winced as his own words repeated in his mind.  _ Good going, Lance.  _ He had to be more careful.

Keith chuckled. “In that case, I’m glad. You’re the one person I wanted to play for, anyway.”

Lance covered his mouth with his hand as his heart threatened to burst from his chest, and he squeezed his eyes shut.  _ Dammit, Keith! If you say stuff like that you’re gonna’ kill me! _ He let out a shaky laugh. “H-haha, yeah! Just ‘cuz you wanna’ show off.”

“Oof, you got me there,” Keith replied. There was fumbling in the background. “Actually, I wanted to ask, um. I’m playing at an open mic night this Thursday night and, uh, I was wondering if you wanted to come?”

“Thursday?” Lance said. “Don’t you have school?”

“No, I’m not a student.”

“You . . . graduated already?” Lance was surprised. Keith was around the same age as him. 

“No, Lance,” Keith said, and Lance could hear his smile. “I didn’t go to college. After high school I went straight into being a musician.” 

Lance gaped. “No way! I totally thought you were in college.”

Keith chuckled. “Nope. So what do you say about the open mic night?”

Lance smiled. “Dude, of course I’ll be there! What time?”

Keith told him the details, and the two chatted a bit more before hanging up. Wow. Lance hadn’t known how dedicated Keith was to being a musician, but obviously it was more than Lance had assumed. Lance grinned to himself as he thought of Keith sitting in boring college classes and taking notes like a good student. He laughed. Yeah, he couldn’t see Keith in that situation without making some kind of trouble. Lance stretched and went back to his homework, looking forward to Thursday when he’d see Keith again. 

* * *

“I think this is the place,” Lance mumbled to himself. He glanced down at his phone, confirming the address that Keith had sent to him. Yep. Definitely this place. It was a cafe that hosted open mic nights every Thursday, which Lance was happy about ‘cuz he’d get to eat something while he watched. He went inside, pausing when he saw how crowded it was. Lance hadn’t expected this many people. He found an empty table in the middle of the audience, setting his bag down to claim his spot. After getting some food and tea, the host went up to the front and introduced all the performers.

Lance watched the performances at first, but if he was being honest they weren’t very good. When was Keith going to go up? Lance sighed and took out his phone, scrolling through social media as he waited. 

“Next up is someone you might know already,” the host said, which caught Lance’s attention. “He’s been slowly getting a reputation and is currently participating in the Battle-of-the-Bands contest. Please welcome, The Legendary Defenders’ Keith Kogane!” 

The crowd cheered in excitement, and Lance looked around at all the people who had come to see Keith. A weird, uncomfortable feeling surrounded him. It took a moment for Lance to realize that he was a bit upset. Had Keith just invited Lance here as another one of these screaming people? Another one of his fans? Lance shook his head. No. There was no way Keith thought of him like that. They were best friends, after all. Keith had said it himself. There was no reason for Lance to be upset. Keith walked on stage, his acoustic guitar in his hand. He sat down on the provided stool and adjusted the microphones, and Lance looked straight at Keith. A small part of him wanted Keith to look for him in the audience, but Lance knew that was crazy. The audience had been darkened, after all. Keith wouldn’t be able to see much of anything.

Keith looked out at the audience. “This is an original song of mine. Please listen and enjoy.” He focused on his guitar and started playing a slower, simple phrase of three chords. He repeated it and started singing.

_ This warmth that I feel _

_ Is starting to drown me _

_ This hope that I have _

_ That you will see me _

_ I know, I know _

_ That we’re not the same, but _

_ I can’t help but hope _

_ And wish for that day _

Keith continued in that fashion, singing about someone he wished would see him. His face grew pained, and the emotion was raw in his voice. Lance watched in awe as Keith’s words reverberated through him, creating a feeling of longing so strong in Lance’s chest that he felt his throat close up and heat press behind his eyes. Keith’s words were exactly what Lance was feeling. It was scary how similar they were. There was nothing Lance wanted more in the world than to be with Keith. Than to hold him, to kiss him, to look at him and know that Keith liked him in the same way. But Lance knew that was never going to happen. Keith grew blurry on stage, and Lance hastily dragged his sleeve across his eyes. He wouldn’t cry. He’d deal with it. Somehow.

Keith finished the song and looked into the crowd, who exploded into cheers and whoops of enjoyment. Keith’s gaze went through the different people, like he was searching for something, eventually stopping on Lance. Lance froze. Could Keith see him? Keith smiled, his expression softening, and Lance smiled back. Keith could see him. And Lance could do nothing but try desperately not to cry. Keith was beautiful. Absolutely beautiful.

Lance went up to him after the show and didn’t even say anything, instead throwing himself at Keith and hugging him tight. Keith let out a laugh and hugged Lance back just as hard. Lance wondered if Keith could feel how fast his heart was beating. He hoped he couldn’t. 

Lance pulled away, giving Keith a huge smile. “Dude, that was . . . amazing. I know I say that about all of your shows, but that was seriously something else.”

Keith rubbed the back of his head, his cheeks growing red as he smiled in return. “Thanks, Lance. I was really glad you came tonight.”

“Of course,” Lance said immediately. “Anything for my best friend.”

Something crossed Keith’s features, and he cleared his throat. “Right. Uh, I was gonna’ go get some dinner. Did you wanna’ join me?”

Lance nodded. “Yeah. Where did you wanna’ go?”

As they talked about food, Lance wondered what he’d seen on Keith’s face just then. It’d been too fast for Lance to recognize, but Lance was thinking there was something going on with Keith that he wasn’t saying. Lance tried not to feel hurt about it, but if they were best friends, didn’t that mean they told each other everything?

_ Not everything _ , he reminded himself. Right. There was the fact that Lance was hopelessly in love with Keith, and Lance would  _ never _ tell him that. He’d rather cut off his right testicle than profess his love. Which, now that Lance was thinking about it, was probably not the best alternative. But if Lance could keep something as colossal as this secret, then Keith had a right to his own secrets too. Lance simply tried to act naturally for the rest of the night.

* * *

The second round of the finals was already upon them. Lance and his friends had just finished their performance, coming off stage feeling really good about how they’d done. The Paladins had been first that night, and Keith wouldn’t be performing until later. After loading their instruments into their van, Lance and his friends went back to the rehearsal room to hang out until it was Keith’s turn. Lance talked with him about nothing and everything, and finally the stagehand came by to let them know to get ready. Lance helped Keith move his instruments, and soon Lance was standing in the wings as The Legendary Defenders went on stage.

Lance felt a tap on his shoulder, and he turned to see Romelle standing next to him. “Romelle? I didn’t know you were here!”

Romelle smiled. “Yeah, I came to see you guys. Well, that and one other thing, but I’ll tell you about that later. Allura said I could come back here to watch Keith’s performance. Is that alright?”

Lance nodded. “Sure. They’re just about to start.”

He and Romelle waited for the curtains to draw back, but as Keith’s performance started Lance started to think about Romelle’s words. Why had she come back here to watch Keith? If she’d watched The Paladins from the audience, surely she could have stayed there. Lance glanced at her to see a wide expression of awe and admiration on her face. Lance blinked. He hadn’t known Romelle had liked The Legendary Defenders so much. 

The curtains closed once the song ended, and Lance went around backstage so he could meet up with Keith again. Keith smiled when he saw Lance, and the two of them high-fived. “Great job tonight, Keith.”

“Thanks,” Keith replied. “You too.” He noticed something behind Lance. “And who’s that?”

Lance turned to see Romelle waiting for him a few yards away. She gestured for him to walk over and Lance blinked. “Uh, that’s a friend of mine. Hold on, I’ll be right back.”

“No worries. I have to reload the instruments anyway.”

Lance let Keith take care of that and walked over to Romelle. She looked a bit embarrassed, and Lance wondered what that was about. “What’s up?”

Romelle smiled shyly. “Um, well, I was hoping you could introduce me to Keith, actually.”

“Keith? Why?”

A faint blush appeared on Romelle’s cheeks. “I’m sort of interested in him. I want to get to know him better.”

An intense bolt of jealousy lurched through Lance’s stomach, accompanied by an overwhelming feeling of possessiveness. Which he knew was ridiculous. Keith didn’t belong to him, and Lance had no right to deny him meeting new people. Even so, it took Lance a moment to reply. “S-sure. I’ll introduce you to him in a bit.”

Romelle’s eyes lit up. “Really?! Oh, that’s fantastic, Lance! Thank you so much!” She gave him a quick hug before heading back to the rehearsal room. “I’ll be with Allura. Just let me know when you get the chance!”

Lance watched Romelle run off as the feeling of jealousy writhed in his stomach. Why was Lance getting so jealous? It wasn’t like it was confirmed that Keith and Romelle would start dating or anything. So why did even the thought of Romelle liking Keith send such a strong feeling of unease through Lance? Lance closed his eyes and took a deep breath. It was just an introduction. It probably wouldn’t lead to anything. Lance let out the breath and tried to calm himself down. He needed to get over himself already. He shook his head and walked out to the back. 

Lance found Keith just finishing up loading the van, and when Keith spotted Lance he smiled and came over to him. “Hey. I’m pretty much done here. Did you want to meet up later to wait for the results?”

Lance swallowed. “Yeah. Actually, a friend of mine wanted me to introduce her to you. If that’s okay.”

“The girl from earlier?” Keith asked. “Yeah, no problem. Where is she?”

“She’s in one of the rehearsal rooms.” Lance turned to lead him back into the building, and he heard Keith’s footsteps behind him. It was just an introduction. It wasn’t like the two were getting married. So why did every step make Lance more and more sick? 

Lance brought Keith in and headed towards Allura and Romelle, who were chatting in the corner. Romelle looked up as they approached and her face lit up in excitement. She left Allura and headed straight over to the two of them, immediately holding her hand out for Keith to grab. 

“Keith, it’s so great to finally meet you!” she said, practically radiating happiness as she shook Keith’s hand. “My name’s Romelle, and I’ve been a fan of yours for a long time!”

Keith looked a bit surprised, but he gave her an easy smile in return. “Nice to meet you, Romelle. Lance said you wanted to be introduced.”

“Yes, I have so many things to ask you about!”

“Well, ask away.”

Lance took a step back to watch the two of them interact, and suddenly he felt like a wall had been put down in front of him. A wall that stretched for miles upon miles and threatened to choke Lance. It was more like . . . drowning. Lance felt like he’d been submerged under a huge body of water, looking up at the distorted figures of Romelle and Keith above the surface. If he reached out to them, would they pull him up? Or would he be doomed to sink forever? 

A tap on the shoulder had Lance jumping, and he looked over to see Allura wearing a concerned expression. “A-Allura?”

“Lance, are you alright?” she whispered. 

Lance could still hear Romelle and Keith talking, and the drowning feeling threatened to overwhelm him. “. . . Yeah. I’m fine.” 

Allura just grew more worried. “Lance . . .”

But Lance forced himself to smile. He turned to Keith, hoping his wobbly smile would be convincing enough. “Um, I’m actually gonna’ go home a bit early. I’m not feeling too good.”

Keith’s brows furrowed. “Do you want me to come with you?” 

He took a step towards Lance, but Lance moved back. “N-no, that’s fine, dude. I don’t want you to catch it, or anything.” 

Keith frowned, his eyes searching Lance’s. “Are you sure?”

Lance averted his gaze, choosing a spot on the wall to focus on. “Yeah. I’ll be fine. I just need to go sleep it off, or something. Haha.”

“I’ll make sure he gets his rest,” Allura said, placing her hand on Lance’s arm. “Let’s go, Lance.” 

“Sorry to hear that, Lance,” Romelle said. “I hope you feel better soon!”

Lance couldn’t even look at her. “Thanks. Me too.”

Once he and Allura were alone, she turned to him. “Before we find Hunk and Pidge, let me ask you something. Do you have feelings for Keith?”

Lance swallowed. Allura was always scary good at noticing these things. “Is it that obvious?”

Allura gave him a gentle smile. “Lance, I told you that it’s not that hard to see. At least, for me, anyway. You must like him a lot, huh?”

“Yes,” Lance replied.

“And seeing him with Romelle is probably not the best feeling in the world,” Allura murmured, understanding growing on her face.

Lance forced a laugh. “Yeah, that’s an understatement.”

Allura didn’t say anything for a bit. “Lance, I might be wrong about this, but I’m pretty sure Keith’s not as straight as you think he is.”

Lance frowned. “No, he’s straight. He told me.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

Allura sighed. “Alright, then. Let’s get the kids and go home, shall we?”

Lance nodded. “Sure.” 

* * *

Lance stared at his phone for the millionth time that night. He’d received a few texts from Keith, which he still hadn’t answered yet, and a text from Romelle that he’d been reading over and over for the last twenty minutes.

_ Thanks so much for introducing me to Keith!  _ She wrote.  _ I asked him if he wanted to hang out and he said YES!!! Can you believe it??? _

No, he couldn’t. Did Keith like Romelle already? Well, she was very pretty and had an energetic and outgoing personality, so it’s not like she was hard to like. But Lance couldn’t, or didn’t want to believe that the two of them were going on a date already. The rational part of his mind reminded him that Romelle had said “hang out” and not “date”, which meant it was entirely possible they were still friends. But how many more hangouts did it take until Keith became interested? Lance groaned and laid his arm over his eyes. He felt like garbage. Like a smelly, heaping pile of garbage that’d been laying out in the sun for a day. And the bag was filled with fish and baby diapers and wet socks. Lance didn’t have the energy to do anything. He just wanted to sleep. So Lance turned over on his bed and tried desperately not to think of Keith and Romelle. He really,  _ really _ tried. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lance, sweetie…… baby…… keith is gay as hell,,,,,,


	16. Chapter 16

Lance’s ringtone woke him up. He forced himself to open his eyes, squinting at his clock to see who was calling him at . . . 1:02 pm. Ugh, he’d slept in. Lance checked the phone and was instantly awake. What should he do? Answer? Lance roughly shook his head. Duh, he should answer! He slid the call button to the right and held his phone to his ear.

“Hello?” Lance’s voice was way too groggy to pretend he hadn’t been sleeping. 

“Finally,” Keith said. “You didn’t respond to any of texts last night, so I was worried. How are you feeling?”

How was Lance supposed to answer that? Even just hearing Keith’s voice was enough to make Lance remember what Romelle had told him yesterday. “Fine, I guess.” 

Keith paused. Could he tell what Lance was feeling? “Okay. I enjoyed meeting Romelle yesterday.”

Lance closed his eyes as another fit of jealousy took hold of him. “Really?”

“Yeah. She’s charming.”

Lance swallowed. “She told me you guys were going to hang out.”

“Yes, turns out we both like a really obscure band. She invited me to a CD store where they sell a bunch of their albums.”

There it was again. The feeling that Lance was drowning. Like his breath was slowly running out, and there was nothing he could do about it. “That's . . . that’s great.”

Another pause. “Are you sure you’re okay, Lance?”

Lance sighed. “Yes, I’m fine. I . . . I have to go now. I’ll talk to you later.”

“Alright.” Keith hung up.

As soon as the call was over Lance felt his eyes prick and his chest tighten. What was he doing? Being short with Keith, who meant the world to him? Lance laid back down in bed and fought to keep himself from crying. Keith meant everything to him. And Lance was ruining their friendship like this. But Lance couldn’t help it. Every time he thought of Keith Lance imagined him going out with Romelle, and it made Lance sick to his stomach. He hated this feeling. More than anything he hated how it was making him treat Keith. Lance knew he shouldn’t be getting so upset, since he pretty much had zero chances with Keith. Maybe distancing himself from Keith would be best for everyone. Lance sighed and got himself out of bed. It was time to start the day anyway.

Lance spent the next week in a haze. He was making easy misses during practice, and he couldn’t focus during class or work. Grant seemed to understand that Lance didn’t want to talk about it, and he gave Lance space. Which Lance appreciated. It was just unfortunate that Lance was getting upset over the stupidest thing. He’d also been ignoring Keith’s texts and calls, or giving half-hearted answers when Lance felt like answering. And every time he felt like the worst person in the world. 

When the third round arrived, Lance told himself he would focus entirely on their performance. It didn’t matter that Keith and Romelle had hung out more than once this week. It didn’t matter that Lance had lost sleep over the thought of the two of them together. None of that mattered. What mattered was Lance giving his best shot during this round. The third round would determine the last three bands standing, where each of them would perform two songs for the fourth round. Lance just needed to be better than one of the bands in order to pull through. Just one. 

The four of them arrived at the venue and Lance tried his best to fully concentrate on each task. Take the instruments out of the van. Move them backstage. Get ready to be called onstage. He could do this. They pulled their song off perfectly, and as soon as they were done Lance went back to pouring his focus on each individual task. Anything to get his mind off of Keith. When he finished reloading the instruments he went back to a rehearsal room with Pidge and Hunk while Allura went to find Romelle.

“Lance, are you going to watch Keith’s performance?” Pidge asked him as Hunk stood up with them.

“Um, no thanks. Not today,” Lance answered.

Hunk frowned. “Dude, are you okay? You’ve been, like, listless all day.”

“Yeah, the only time you’ve had energy today was when we were performing,” Pidge added.

“Whaaaat?” Lance said, forcing a smile. “No way, guys. I’m totally fine.”

They shared a look. “You can tell us if something’s up,” Hunk said. “We’re here for you.”

“Not to mention it’s totally out of the ordinary that you’re not, like, attached to Keith’s hip,” Pidge said, earning a nudge from Hunk.

Lance held his smile. “Thanks, guys. But I’m fine, I promise.”

“Okay,” Hunk said. “We’ll be back soon.”

As soon as they left the room Lance sat down and put his head in his hands. He hated this. He hated everything about this. Lance hated how he couldn’t even watch his best friend perform without thinking of Romelle and getting jealous. What was wrong with him? 

The performance finished and Lance stood up. Since he wasn’t doing anything of importance he might as well loathe himself in the van as he waited for his friends. Lance left the rehearsal room and started walking there, but as he was about to pass a corner he heard something that made him stop.

“Keith, I wanted to talk to you about something,” Romelle said.

What? Lance pressed up against the wall, hardly daring to peer around the corner. Romelle and Keith were alone. Keith’s back was to him, and from here Lance could see the sweat that had dampened the hair at the nape of Keith’s neck. Lance swallowed. Dammit.

“What’s up?” Keith asked.

Romelle let out a shaky breath. “Wow, I didn’t think I’d be this nervous. I’ll just say it. I like you, and I was wondering if we could go out on a date. What do you think?”

Oh. So there it was. Everything was done now. Keith would say yes. Of course he would. Lance drew in a painful breath and took a step back. He had to get out of there before he heard Keith’s response. Lance tried to turn and take off running at the same time, but he tripped over his own foot and fell to the floor. 

“Crap!” he yelled.

“Lance?”

He turned to see Keith and Romelle looking down at him with surprised expressions. Suddenly Lance’s chest felt too tight. Like he couldn’t breathe. God, he couldn’t  _ breathe _ . “H-hey, guys. I-I wasn’t spying or anything I, uh, just fell down.” He quickly got to his feet and brushed off his knees. “See? I’m totally fine. A-anyway, see ya!” 

Lance took off running in the opposite direction, ignoring Keith’s call of his name. He ran to the other side of the venue, barely even looking where he was going except to avoid other people. By the time he stopped and looked at where he was, he was in a secluded part of the building with nobody around him. Good. Lance didn’t want to be around anyone right now.

“Lance!” 

Lance whipped around to see the one person he couldn’t bear to see right now. Keith’s hands were on his knees as he tried to catch his breath, and Lance faced the wall as he waited for Keith’s inevitable questions.

“Lance, what’s going on with you?” Keith asked, standing up straight. “And don’t try to tell me you’re fine, ‘cuz you’re obviously not.”

“I’m  _ fine _ ,” Lance insisted. “There’s nothing wrong.”

“Bullshit,” Keith retorted, taking a step towards him. “Anyone with half a brain can tell something’s up. Please, can you talk to me?”

For a second Keith sounded so distraught that Lance wanted to tell him. But Lance couldn’t bring himself to do it. “I . . . can’t.”

Keith sighed. “If you don’t want to talk about it, that’s fine. But don’t shut me out like this. Let me support you. We’re supposed to be friends, aren’t we?”

“Maybe we shouldn’t be.” No. Wait, Lance didn’t want this. Why did he say that? Why had those words come out of his mouth? That wasn’t what he wanted at all. 

“What are you saying?” Keith’s voice was quiet.

Lance didn’t reply. He couldn’t reply.

“Lance McClain, look me in the eye and tell me you don’t want to be friends anymore,” Keith said. His voice was shaking.

Lance felt sick. He was drowning again, but this time the water was freezing. He couldn’t sense which way was up. He couldn’t feel his own body. Lance walked past Keith with his gaze trained on the floor. “Just leave me alone. Please.”

Lance walked away from Keith, and this time he wasn’t followed.

* * *

When Lance got home the first thing he did was drop onto his bed. He felt numb. His limbs were impossible to move, and when he turned his head it was like everything was moving in slow motion. Lance rolled onto his back and unlocked his phone. No new messages. Obviously. He’d just told Keith, the person he was  _ in love with _ , to leave him alone. And had possibly cut off their friendship forever. Lance scrolled through the previous messages between him and Keith, landing on a link he had yet to open. It was a link to a video of the night Keith had performed at the cafe. Lance had asked for it so he could listen later, and Keith had sent it to him. Lance clicked on it and watched.

And suddenly everything flooded over Lance. The ramifications of what he’d done, the realization that he’d never be able to fix what had happened. The thought of losing Keith made Lance’s heart contract with pain, and Lance gripped his chest. When Keith’s voice echoed through the phone’s speakers, Lance found himself crying and unable to stop it. He tried to stifle his sobs, hiccuping in pain when they caught in his throat. The tears ran hot down his cheeks, and Lance cried until his head throbbed. He hated himself. Why had he done that to his best friend? Just because Lance didn’t want to see Keith in a relationship with someone else? What kind of a person was he? He loved Keith with his whole body, his entire being. Lance couldn’t bear the thought of never seeing him again, never seeing Keith’s smile or his laugh or how his eyes lit up when he talked about something he liked. 

“D-dammit,” Lance sobbed, and it made him cry harder. All the while Keith’s beautiful voice streamed from Lance’s phone. Lance loved the way Keith sounded. He loved everything about Keith. 

But it was too late. Lance couldn’t do anything anymore. He bundled up into a ball and cried, aching with the loss of his friend.

* * *

“Hey, is everything alright with Lance?” Pidge whispered.

“I think it has to do with Keith,” Allura replied. “He’s been spending a lot of time with Romelle recently.”

“Do you think they’re going out?” Hunk asked.

“No idea,” Allura said. “She hasn’t said anything about it.”

“You know I can hear you,” Lance announced.

“We’re worried about you, Lance,” Pidge said. 

The four of them were on their way to the fourth and final round. Normally Lance would be over the moon ecstatic about the fact that they’d made it to the finals. Keith and Lotor’s bands had too. But Lance had been dragging around a dark storm cloud with him all week, and no amount of music or nerves could make up for the fact that he’d basically told his best friend to piss off. What a  _ great _ friend Lance was. 

At least Allura had the decency to look guilty. “What happened, Lance? Please talk to us.”

“Romelle confessed to Keith,” he muttered. 

“And?” Hunk asked. “What did he say?”

Lance shrugged. “I dunno’. I interrupted them, ran away, and told Keith we shouldn’t be friends anymore.”

“YOU WHAT?!” the three of them shrieked.

“That’s it, I’m pulling over!” Hunk yelled. He pulled them to the side of the highway, got out of the driver’s seat, and flung the van’s side door open. “Lance, what are you doing?!”

Lance blinked in surprise. “I—”

“You’re not serious, are you?” Allura demanded. “Tell me you’re not serious!”

“Lance, you are  _ such _ an idiot sometimes,” Pidge sighed, taking off their glasses to pinch the bridge of their nose.

Lance would have said something in retort, since he was starting to get a bit mad, but Hunk reached into the van, grabbed Lance by the collar, and dragged him onto the road. “Lance McClain, you are a world class idiot!”

Lance tried to push Hunk off him, but Hunk was stronger than him by a lot. “Lemme go, Hunk!”

“No!” Hunk yelled. “Not until you march your ass into the building, find that boy, and apologize to him!”

Lance gawked. “What?!”

“You heard me!” Hunk raised his voice, gripping Lance’s collar tighter and pulling him in closer. “If you don’t apologize to Keith Kogane I’ll never forgive you!”

“Is this about being friends with The Legendary Defenders?” Lance asked. “‘Cuz if so, then I’m gonna’ be really pissed o—”

“No, it’s not about that at all!” Hunk said, finally setting Lance down. He poked Lance in the shoulder. “It’s about the fact that Keith is your  _ best friend _ , and you  _ love him _ !”

Lance shoved Hunk’s hand away. “Exactly! And if he’s with Romelle then I—”

“But he’s not with Romelle, is he?” Hunk said.

“She confessed to him!”

“Do you know  _ for sure _ that Keith is dating Romelle?”

“I—,” Lance stopped himself. Now that he thought about it, he actually  _ didn’t _ know for sure. “Well, no, actually I don’t.”

The three of them groaned in unison, and Lance felt his face heat with embarrassment. “Whatever! It’s too late to do anything about it now.”

“It’s never too late, Lance,” Allura said, her face sad. “We’ve seen how upset you’ve been. Are you sure you can continue without ever talking to Keith again?”

No, he wasn’t. Lance knew in his heart it would take him a long,  _ long _ time to get over Keith. Lance missed him so much, and every morning he woke up with his chest aching. “I . . . don’t know.”

“We do,” Pidge said. “Now get back in the car, you guys. We’re gonna’ be late.”

They continued to the performance hall, with Hunk, Pidge, and Allura discussing ways Lance could try talking to Keith again. Lance loved his friends, and he really appreciated their efforts, but it wasn’t as simple as just talking to Keith again. Lance was in love with him. And knowing they could never be together was one of the most painful things Lance had ever experienced. 

Lance waited in the rehearsal room. Even though only three bands would be performing there were still a lot of people backstage, friends from other bands and family members who had come to hang out and support. Normally Lance liked being around a lot of people, but today he wasn't feeling it. He left the rehearsal room and went to find a corner where he could be alone before the performances started. He was able to find one near the stage-right entrance, and he leaned against the wall as he stared up at the wires and tech stuff covering the walls. 

“Lance McClain.”

Lance closed his eyes and groaned. This was the  _ last _ person he wanted to be dealing with right now. “What, Lotor? Come to harass me again?”

Lotor scoffed and placed a hand on his chest. “What? Me? Well, I never. I just came here to congratulate you for getting to the finals.”

Lance glared at him. “Right. And I’m a mermaid.”

Lotor laughed, walking over to stand in front of him. From this angle Lotor was blocking off the rest of the hallway, and Lance stood up straight in case he needed to run. “Seriously, I did. You’ve impressed me, Lance. You know, at first I thought you were nothing but Keith Kogane’s fanboy.”

“I told you I was the leader of The Paladins when we first met,” Lance reminded him, crossing his arms.

“Yes, but you defended him so gallantly,” Lotor smirked.

Lance averted his gaze. “Yeah, well, there’s no need for me to do that anymore.”

“Oh, that’s right,” Lotor drawled, leaning in closer. “I thought I saw Kogane with that pretty young thing last time. Did she get to him before you did?” Lance’s expression must have said everything, because Lotor threw his head back and laughed. “Hah! I knew it.”

Lance grit his teeth. “You don’t know anything.”

“I know that means you’ll have to give up on him,” Lotor murmured. He placed his hand on the wall next to Lance’s head, trapping him in. “Meaning I get to have you all to myself.”

Lance swallowed. “You don’t get to ‘have’ me, or whatever you wanna’ call it. I said no the first time, so back off.” Lance pushed past him and started walking away, but Lotor grabbed his wrist, making Lance stop in his tracks. “Let go.”

“Come on, Lance,” Lotor said. “Don’t you want to have a bit of fun?”

Lance’s hands curled into fists and glared at Lotor. “Not with you, I don’t.” He tried to pull his arm away to no avail, only ending up causing Lotor to tighten his grip.

Something moved in the corner of Lance’s eye, but before he could look at it, too many things happened at the same time. The grip on Lance’s wrist disappeared, Lotor let out a yell of pain, and the sound of two things loudly smacking together echoed in the hallway. Then suddenly, Keith was standing before Lance. Keith, who was wearing the red jacket Lance loved him in. Keith, who was breathing hard and had a look of burning hatred on his face. Keith, who, at that moment, looked more beautiful to Lance than anything he’d ever seen.

“What the fuck!” Lotor yelled. His hand was pressed to his face, and his eye on that side was squinted shut.

Keith turned his attention to Lance and his expression shifted, becoming worried. He took a step towards Lance and placed a gentle touch on Lance’s shoulder. “Lance, are you okay?”

Lance wanted nothing more to embrace Keith and tell him everything. What had just happened with Lotor, what Lance had been feeling the past few weeks, and how much Lance cared for him. But the thought was terrifying. It was crazy and irrational and terrifying. So Lance shook off Keith’s hand and looked away. “I’m fine. I don’t need you to rescue me.” 

“I wasn’t doing anything wrong to begin with!” Lotor cried, standing up with his hand still on his cheek.

Keith fixed him with another violent glare and started to move towards him, but Lance pushed him aside. “I said I’m fine, Keith! I can fight my own battles! I don’t need you in my life anymore, so would you just leave me alone?!” 

Keith’s eyes were wide when he looked at Lance. His eyes searched Lance’s and for a moment he looked devastated by Lance’s words. But that moment passed, quickly replaced by anger that scrunched Keith’s features and had Lance cursing himself for doing something as stupid as that. Keith gripped Lance’s sleeve, turned around, and started marching away, leaving Lotor to stare on with a dumbfounded and incredulous expression. 

Lance tried to pull away. “Keith, would you stop for one second? Where the hell are you taking me?”

“Shut up, Lance.”

“You can’t be serious.”

Keith glared at him, and Lance swallowed. Yep. He was serious. So Lance shut his mouth and waited for Keith to take him wherever it was they were going. A handful of steps later and Keith was opening a supply closet, dragging Lance inside and closing the door. He leaned against it, probably preventing Lance from leaving, and folded his arms. Lance scowled at him, wondering what the hell he was thinking, and leaned against a rack of supplies at the other end of the closet.

“You wanna’ tell me what we’re doing in here?” Lance demanded.

“What’s going on with you, Lance?” Keith asked. “You’ve been avoiding me for the past couple of weeks, and last week you said you didn’t want to be friends anymore. Which I still don’t buy, by the way. So what’s actually going on?”

Lance remained silent. He was desperately trying to temper the storm inside him, and having Keith with him in such a small enclosed space wasn’t helping. One part of Lance was aching to touch him, to hold him, to  _ kiss  _ him. Another part of Lance was yelling at him to just tell Keith and get everything over with. And the final part of Lance was reminding him that he couldn’t be with Keith, replaying Romelle’s confession in his head like a broken record.

Keith sighed and tried again. His tone was softer. “Lance, I . . . I don’t know if I did something to make you dislike me. But I’d rather you tell me than just cut things off like this. I’m worried about you, especially after what just happened. And . . . I miss you.”

“I told you I can fight my own battles,” Lance muttered, his heart lurching at Keith’s words. He knew it was unfair. He also knew that he’d been ridiculously relieved to have Keith show up when he had.

Keith shook his head, his eyebrows furrowing. “That doesn’t explain why you’ve been avoiding me. I was talking with Romelle about this, and—”

“Oh, so you just talk to Romelle about everything, now, huh?” Lance snapped. It was like he couldn’t stop himself from saying these things. The jealousy ripped through him and made him says things he would never say normally.

Keith looked confused. “What are you talking about? Romelle’s your friend, isn’t she? So she’d be able to help.”

“Yeah, except you went to  _ her _ about it instead of me.”

“You’ve been ignoring me this whole time!”

“But you didn’t have to talk to  _ Romelle _ about me!”

“Is it a problem that I’m talking to Romelle?”

“Yes!” Lance burst. His frustration boiled over. “It’s a problem because I can’t stop imagining the two of you together. I can’t stop thinking about what you do together, what you do to each other. And it’s-it’s . . . it’s making it so I can’t  _ breathe _ ! Don’t you get it, Keith?” 

Keith looked stunned for a moment before his features darkened in anger. He stepped closer to Lance, ending up so that their faces were only a foot apart. “No, I don’t get it, Lance. If you have something you want to say about me, I’d rather you say it to my face.”

This close to Keith, Lance could practically taste the tension in the air. Lance was certain it was something of his own making, but he couldn’t ignore the chills and heat that mixed and traveled up and down his body. He also didn’t know how he was going to proceed. Should he tell Keith the truth? Or refuse to say anything? Either way, his friendship with Keith was pretty much ruined. Lance had screwed up everything. He’d messed up possibly the best friendship he’d ever had. His throat starting closing at that thought, and Lance knew if he was going to lose Keith he might as well tell Keith the truth. 

Lance swallowed. “Okay. Fine. The truth is . . .” Damn, his heart was about ready to burst out of his chest. “The truth . . . is that for the longest time, I’ve had feelings for you. Romantic feelings.”

Keith blinked and took a slight step back. His eyes were wide and his mouth was slightly open in surprise. He looked like he couldn’t believe what Lance had just said.

“Which is gross, I know!” Lance said, his vision blurring with tears. “You’re straight, so you probably don’t like hearing this, but I think about being with you and kissing you and doing other things that friends don’t do. Which is why when Romelle started talking to you I got jealous and I couldn’t talk to you without feeling bad and I know I’m screwing everything up and that doesn’t excuse my behavior lately, but what do you expect me to do? I like you so much it hurts, Keith!”

The resounding silence echoed in Lance’s ears. He’d said it. His tears ran down his face and looked away as he wiped at them. There was no going back after this. Keith would say he didn’t feel the same way, and they’d never be friends again. 

“Lance.”

Lance kept his gaze on the floor.

“Lance, look at me. Please.”

Lance did as he asked, finding an unreadable expression on Keith’s face. Keith took a breath. “Lance, I—”

“Would all performers please gather backstage for their places. Performance starts in ten.” 

The PA’s muffled voice clicked off, and Keith frowned. He gazed at Lance with that same indecipherable look, saying something after a brief pause. “We’ll talk about this later, okay? I promise.”

Without another word Keith left the supply closet, leaving Lance by himself to grapple with what Keith had just said. They’d talk about it later? What did that mean? Did that mean Keith still wanted to be friends? If he didn’t want to be friends, he would have refused Lance outright. But the fact that they were going to talk about it later meant something good, right? At least, Lance hoped it did. Lance used his sleeve to dry his face, hoping his eyes weren’t too puffy, and stepped out, heading back to his band. When he found them gathered in the hallway outside the wings they all looked worried. 

Pidge spotted him first and run up to him. “Lance! Where have you been?”

“We were worried about you,” Allura added, her and Hunk coming up to stand next to them. “Are you alright?”

Nope, he definitely wasn’t. But Lance took a deep breath and gave his friends his best smile. “Yeah. I’m fine, guys. I’ll tell you about it later.”

Movement behind them caught his eye, and Lance looked over to see Lotor and his band preparing to go on stage. They were first on the list, if Lance remembered correctly, and as they passed by Lotor gave Lance a glare filled with contempt. Anger burned in Lance’s chest and he returned the look. Whatever he had going on with Keith was one thing, but Lance felt cold resolve to beat the pants off of Lotor. Lance just needed to focus on giving these last two performances his all, and he’d be set. Each band would perform twice for the finals. Lance and his friends had rehearsed their songs to perfection, and Lance truly felt ready for this. He compartmentalized his emotions, setting aside the trouble with Keith, and helped his friends move their instruments to the wings. They’d be able to do this. Lance knew it. Keith would have to wait.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TTATT i don’t like writing lance so sad UGH WHY DO I DO THIS TO MYSELF. There’s one more chapter left to wrap everything up, so stay tuned!!! I can’t believe this series is almost over already :’)))


	17. Chapter 17

Lance checked his watch for the hundredth time. 10:47 PM. When would Keith call? Lance let out a rough sigh and leaned back in his chair. Then he decided he was too restless to sit and immediately got up to start pacing around his room. Keith said he’d call, right? Was it too much to expect him to call tonight? Dread squirmed in Lance’s stomach and made him feel even more nervous than he already was. He just wanted to get it over with.

After finishing the final performances and putting everything away, Lance had run to Keith’s van to see if they could talk. 

_ “Keith!” Lance called. He came to a stop in front of him, taking a beat to catch his breath. “Um, are you . . . can we—” _

_ “Sorry, Lance,” Keith said, his expression regretful. “I have to leave right away for some band stuff, but I  _ will _ call you later.” _

_ Lance swallowed. “But, I—” _

_ “Don’t worry, Lance,” Keith said. The look he gave Lance said everything and nothing. “We’ll figure it out.” _

“But what does that mean?!!” Lance yelled, grabbing his pillow and screaming into it. He threw it to the floor in a huff. He couldn't stand this kind of waiting. It was painful, and anxiety-inducing, and made him wish he’d never said anything. But Lance had to admit it felt better now that Keith knew his feelings. 

The ring from his phone made him jump, and Lance scrambled to grab it. In his panic-ridden state he managed to accomplish nothing short of shoving the phone off his desk, and Lance cursed as he dropped to the floor. He finally found it before the last ring, and with shaking hands he answered. “H-hello?”

“Lance, hey,” Keith said. “I’m hoping this isn’t a bad time?”

“N-no!” Lance stammered. “Now is fine!”

“Okay. Can you meet me at the park, then? I feel like things like this should be done in person.”

Lance swallowed as his heart took a dip. Keith was going to reject him. He knew it. Lance clenched his jaw and fought against the choking feeling rising in his throat. “Y-yeah, okay. I’ll head over there now.”

“Great. I’ll see you soon.”

The phone lingered in Lance’s hand even after they hung up. All Lance could do was stare at it. Keith was going to reject him. Damnit, Keith was going to  _ reject _ him. Lance squeezed his eyes shut against the choking feeling again. He couldn't lose it. Not now. He’d hear what Keith had to say first. Lance stood up, grabbed his keys, and put his shoes on.

His nerves started acting up again when he got to the park. Lance kept swallowing, trying to get rid of his dry throat, and he kept having to wipe his hands off on his pants. He could feel himself shaking all over.  _ Keep it together, Lance. It’s just a conversation. _

Keith was by the swings again, glancing at his phone. The tanbark crunched under Lance’s feet, catching Keith’s attention, and he gave Lance a small smile. “Hey. I, uh, didn’t think you were gonna’ come.”

Lance swallowed again. “Why?”

“Because of what we have to talk about.”

Lance couldn't bring himself to meet Keith’s gaze. “Oh. Yeah.”

“Hey, it’s not bad,” Keith said, taking a step towards Lance. “I promise it’s not bad, it’s just, uh, hard to say.”

Oh. Here it was. The moment Keith would tell Lance he just wanted to remain friends, and the moment Lance had been dreading all night. He opened his mouth to say something, but Keith interrupted him. “Let’s go for a walk.”

Lance blinked. “O-okay.” 

The two of them walked side by side along the path, with Lance keeping his gaze firmly on the stone in front of them. Keith tried to make small talk, pointing out little things about the park here and there, but Lance couldn’t get the words out. He kept thinking of things to say in return, but it was like his voice wouldn’t listen to him. More than anything, Lance waited in apprehension for the words Keith would inevitably say. The more Lance thought about them, the more scared he got, and the more scared he got the more he didn’t want to be here. Lance couldn’t even be next to Keith without thinking of kissing him and here they were, about to have a “can we still be friends” discussion. 

Lance stopped in his tracks. He couldn’t take this anymore. This feeling of wanting, of  _ needing _ to be with Keith, and the knowledge that it’d never happen.

“Lance?” Keith said, turning to look at him.

Lance could feel his throat closing up, and heat started to press behind his eyes. “I’m sorry, Keith. I’m sorry for everything.” Tears slid down his cheeks and he used the heel of his hand to hastily wipe them away. “I-I messed everything up by telling you that I like you, and now you just wanna’ be friends, and I, I get that, I really do. You’re obviously not into me and, and I’m sorry for getting upset with you. It’s just that whenever I’d see you with Romelle I’d get jealous and it made me such an asshole to you, and. . . Oh, god, I’m so sorry, Keith. I ruined everything.”

Keith looked absolutely dismayed. He quickly took a step towards Lance, grabbing his hands and holding them in his own. “No, no,  _ I’m _ sorry, Lance. God, Lance, I’m sorry. I-I’m not good with this kind of thing. I have trouble expressing my emotions sometimes, especially when I really like someone.”

Lance blinked, sending more tears down his face. “Wait, wh-what?”

Keith’s cheeks reddened, and he gave a hesitant smile. “I should have said so earlier, but I’m saying I like you too, Lance. You big idiot.”

Lance couldn’t think for a moment. Keith . . . liked him? Keith  _ actually _ liked him back? “Wait, you’re gay?”

Keith laughed. “Yes, Lance. I am.”

Lance sniffled. “But then, you, with Romelle, and all your ex-girlfriends . . .”

“We were just friends. And I never said I had ex-girlfriends.” He raised an eyebrow. “Were you picturing girls the entire time?”

“Well, you never mentioned their gender, so how would I know?!”

Keith chuckled, squeezing Lance’s hands. “I’ve actually liked you for a long time,” Keith said, his face growing redder. “But I thought you were straight, so . . . I tried not to get my hopes up. And the more time we spent together, the more I liked you. Even though I knew I shouldn’t.”  

“I thought I was straight, too!” Lance exclaimed. “I kept thinking I was just feeling ‘intense friendship’ for you, or something.”

Keith chuckled. He brought his hand to Lance’s face, gently wiping away a tear. Lance leaned into his touch, shuddering at the contact. Keith’s eyes flitted across his face, landing on Lance’s lips.  “Lance?”

Lance swallowed. “Yeah?”

“I . . . I really need to kiss you. Can I?”

Lance hardly felt the word pass his lips. “Yeah.”

Keith leaned in slightly, and Lance closed his eyes as Keith’s lips barely brushed against his own. Lance gasped at the fire that seared his skin, and suddenly he couldn’t wait for more. He leaned the rest of the way in, pressing his lips to Keith’s and wrapping his arms around Keith’s neck. Keith fully responded, bringing his hands to Lance’s back and pulling him in. Keith’s lips moved with Lance’s and all coherent thought left his brain. It was like Lance couldn’t get enough of him. Their chests pressed together and Lance could feel Keith’s heart beating just as fast against his. It only served to make Lance want him more, and Lance ran his hands through Keith’s hair. It was just as soft—no, softer—than Lance had imagined, and he heard Keith give a quiet moan. A moan which practically sent Lance flying.

Lance pulled away, breaking the kiss. They were both breathing heavily, and Keith’s lips were swollen from kissing him. Lance thought he could have been happy for the next hundred years from that sight. 

Keith pressed his forehead to Lance’s and let out a shaky breath. “Wow. I, uh, wasn’t expecting that.”

Lance gave a weak laugh. “ Me neither. I can’t believe I thought I was completely straight.”

Keith chuckled. “What was it you said that one time? ‘I’m totally gay for you, dude’?”

A blush rose to heat Lance’s face. “Uh, ahaha. Something like that?”

“Well, guess what?” Keith said, tilting his face so his nose brushed against Lance’s. 

Lance barely dared to breathe. “What?”

“I’m totally gay for you, too.”

“Just kiss me, Mullet-Head.”

* * *

Lance held hands with Keith on the way back to their cars, agreeing to go back to Lance’s house. His pulse was still going crazy, but it wasn’t out of anxiety anymore. Lance was simply excited and happy to be around Keith, although he didn’t quite know how he was supposed to behave in a gay relationship. Was it any different from a relationship with a girl? How would Lance know? When they got back to the house they headed straight to Lance’s room, where Lance sat down on his bed and tried to keep his palms from getting sweaty. Keith took a look around before taking a seat next to Lance on the bed.

“So, uh,” Lance started, “I’m not really sure how to say this.”

“What is it?” Keith asked. 

Lance swallowed. “I’ve never, um, been with a guy?”

Keith nodded. “Don’t worry, Lance. We can take things at your own pace. I do want to ask you if you want to be exclusive? Uh, that might be a little fast, or something, but I—”

“Absolutely!” Lance interrupted. “Don’t kiss anyone else but me.”

Keith laughed. “Okay, Lance. I will be sure to only kiss you.”

He leaned forward and Lance gladly met him halfway, allowing their lips to meet and that amazing tingling feeling to wash over him. Lance smiled through the kiss. Was this really happening? Was he actually dating Keith Kogane? He couldn’t believe how lucky he was. Suddenly a knock sounded at the door.

He immediately pulled away from Keith. “Y-yes!”

The door opened just a crack, and Pidge poked their head through just enough to show their eyes. “So, are you two, like, boyfriends now?”

Lance’s face burned. “Pidge! Seriously?”

They opened the door a little to show a huge smile on their face. “You are, aren’t you!” 

Keith looked embarrassed and slightly uncomfortable. “Um, well, uh . . .”

“Guys, get up here!” Pidge yelled down the stairs. “Lance and Keith are making out!”

“Pidge!” Lance yelled. 

“I think I’m gonna’ go for now,” Keith said as he stood up. 

Lance shot to his feet. “I’ll walk you out.” As they passed Pidge in the hallway Lance gave them a hard glare. “Don’t you  _ dare _ follow me, Pidgeon.”

They smirked. “Whatever you say,  _ Lover-Boy Lance. _ ” Great. Lance would probably be stuck with that nickname for the rest of his life, thanks to the gremlin. He made a mental note to kick Pidge’s butt later. 

Lance walked Keith to the door to get their shoes on, closing it behind them once they were outside. They walked to Keith’s car, where Keith turned to him before his gaze settled on something over his shoulder. “Looks like we’ve got an audience.”

Lance turned around to see Pidge, Hunk, and Allura all watching him through the window. At least Allura had the decency to hide when she saw him looking back, but Pidge and Hunk just gave him big smiles and four thumbs up. Lance blushed heavily and turned his back to them. “Whatever. They don’t matter.”

Keith smiled and reached for Lance’s hand. For a moment the two of them just stood there looking at each other. And when Lance felt the butterflies in his stomach, it was accompanied by an overwhelming feeling of joy and warmth. His happiness threatened to choke him, and Lance squeezed Keith’s hand.

Keith squeezed it back. “I have to go now. But do you wanna’ have dinner at my place tomorrow?”

Lance nodded. “Definitely.” Before he lost his nerve he leaned in and quickly kissed Keith. It was short, but very sweet.

Keith let out a content sigh. “Bye, Lance.”

“Bye, Keith.”

Keith got in his car and drove away, giving Lance a wave as he passed by. Lance waved back, and when Keith’s car was out of sight Lance gave a huge jump in the air. He whooped and cheered and practically sprinted back into the house, where he shouted, “I’M DATING KEITH KOGANE!!”

His friends came rushing around the corner with cheers of their own, and Hunk wasted no time in bulldozing Lance with a huge hug. Lance laughed, and when he was set down Pidge wrapped him in another hug. Finally Allura came up to him and tackled him in a big hug of her own. 

“Finally!” Pidge said. “It was almost painful watching you two dance around each other like that.”

“I’ve known for a while,” Allura said, a smug look on her face.

“Yeah, Allura knew before I did,” Lance admitted. 

Hunk clapped him on the shoulder. “The important thing is that you’re together now.”

“And you’re totally gonna’ bone later,” Pidge added.

Lance’s eyes widened and he could feel his blush all the way down his neck. “Bone?!”

“What?! I’m right, aren’t I?”

Lance paused. He thought about it. Then felt his face get even redder. “Yeah,” he mumbled.

“Hah! I knew it!”

“Whatever!” He shoved Pidge’s face away from him. “You’re such a stalker.”

“Maybe we should all go get dinner somewhere,” Allura suggested, tactfully changing the subject.

“Yeah, good idea!” Hunk agreed. “What about that Japanese place where they cook the food in front of you?”

“That sounds good!” Lance said. 

“Alright, let’s all go!” Pidge declared, immediately heading to the entrance. 

* * *

Lance checked the elevator mirror one last time to make sure his hair was in place before walking to Keith’s apartment door and knocking. Keith greeted him with a broad smile, leaning in to place a gentle kiss on Lance’s lips. Lance felt his heart soar.

“Hey,” Keith murmured.

“Hey.”

Lance went inside, setting his stuff down on the coffee table before flopping down on the couch. “By the way, congrats on getting first place.” The results for the finals had been posted yesterday, and Lance had been filled with a mixture of relief and pride. He was happy with second as long as Keith was first. 

Keith’s eyes lit up. “Thanks. Congrats on getting second.”

Lance gave him a huge smile. “Thanks! I’m just glad Lotor didn’t get anything.” The Paladins had received a $1000 cash prize as a reward for being runner up, but third place hadn’t received anything.  _ Suck it, Lotor _ .

Keith hummed in agreement. “Me too. If I ever see his face again I won’t hesitate to throttle him on the spot.”

Lance’s eyes widened, and he remembered that Keith had pretty much saved him yesterday. “Oh, yeah. I didn’t thank you for helping me yesterday when, uh . . .”

Keith placed his hand on Lance’s, sending a fresh wave of electricity through him. “There’s no need to thank me, Lance. I couldn’t stand by and do nothing.”

Lance’s features softened, and he leaned forward to press his forehead to Keith’s. Keith’s exhale was unsteady, but he pulled Lance’s hand up to gently kiss it. For a moment the two stayed like that, neither one expecting more but both of them leaning on each other. Lance closed his eyes and his happiness threatened to overwhelm him. God, how could be this lucky? 

Keith was the one to pull away. “By the way, I go on tour with Marmora Blade at the end of the year, and it’s only for a few months. So we’ll be able to spend some time together before then.”

“That’s good,” Lance said. “You know I’ll be watching all of your performances live.”

Keith smiled. “I’ll keep that in mind. All of my performances are for you, anyway.”

Suddenly Lance remembered something. “Wait. The open mic night at the cafe you had an original song, and you sang about not hoping someone could see you. Was that about . . . me?”

And then Lance wished he’d gotten a recording of Keith’s reaction, because Keith turned redder than Lance had ever seen him. The blush reached down his neck almost down to his collarbone. “Y-yeah. Please don’t bring that up.”

Lance laughed wholeheartedly at Keith’s embarrassment, wrapping him in a tight hug. “Awww, it’s okay, babe, no need to get embarrassed. Do you wanna’ play video games to distract you?”

Keith sighed, and Lance looked up to see him pouting. “Yes.”

Lance grinned and turned on the console and loaded up Smash, taking him back to when they first played it. This time Lance would win. But as he was getting closer and closer to delivering the final blow, Keith leaned over and whispered, “I like when you call me ‘babe’, by the way”, and Lance got so flustered he flubbed the match. 

“Darn you, Kogane!” Lance growled. “Making me lose.”

Keith smirked. “Just ‘cuz you’re my boyfriend doesn’t mean I’ll go easy on you.”

Lance giggled. “Heh. ‘Boyfriend’. I like the sound of that.”

Keith turned to him and linked his arms around Lance’s neck, dropping the controller on the table. “I like the sound of you.”

Lance winced. “Oof, gross, dude. That’s way too cheesy.”

“You started it, Lover-Boy Lance.”

“If you keep calling me that I’ll have to shut you up.”

Keith grinned and shifted his leg over Lance’s lap so Keith was straddling him. “And how will you do that?”

Lance swallowed and returned a wobbly grin, his pulse migrating to his stomach and his face burning. “I’ll kiss you.”

Keith smiled wider and leaned his face in closer. “Alright then, Lover-Boy Lance. Are you gonna’ keep your promise or what?”

Lance chuckled, saying, “Darn you, Kogane,” before closing his eyes and meeting Keith’s lips with his own. Their video games would have to wait.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I CAN'T BELIEVE IT’S FINALLY DONE!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you to anyone who stayed with me this far, your encouragement is super motivating and I couldn’t be more grateful. I hope you’ve enjoyed it and I hope you stick around for my next klance fic (which is currently in the works, btw ;)))) I’m most active on my tumblr (same username), where i post fanart, memes, and other ship-related material, so if you wanna follow me there that’d be great! That’s all for now! See ya!!


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